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Reviews for The heart of the cards

By : yugixdmg
  • From ANON - ChaosLacky on January 11, 2006
    For a PWP it's got an okay story but it looks like there have been formatting errors where parts of sentences have been cut off. Here are a few examples:

    Yugi whined to his other slef. said his other self sadly. said Yugi to Yami. he said to Yugi.


    "Well I want you to make love to me." she said taking off his cloths. said Yugi to Yami. said Yami goading Yugi. said Yugi as his member reached about 9 inches and increadibly thick to which the Dark Magician Girl squealed in delight and thought said Yugi.


    Also a large part of the text is italized.
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  • From ANON - Matt Gross on September 05, 2005
    This is a very good story. Could you show what happens between Joey and the Lady Assailant of Flames? I want to see what happens when the Lady Assailant seduces Joey.
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  • From ANON - the ? on June 15, 2005
    VERY INTERESTING, CONTINUE!!!!!!
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  • From ANON - dale ray ii on May 03, 2005
    greatest couples yugi/dmg and joey/the lady assilante.
    making some more chapters.
    thank you
    dale ray cameronii
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  • From ANON - dale ray ii on April 29, 2005
    please making some more chapters.
    greatest pairing little yugi/Dmg.
    please and thank you
    dale ray cameronii

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  • From ANON - dale ray ii on April 12, 2005
    i love it.please some more chapters and the best pairing of little yugi/dmg
    please and thank you
    your friend
    dale ray cameronii
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  • From ANON - Yugi X Black Magician Girl Fan on December 05, 2004
    LOL! That story rocks! Best story in the world!
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  • From ANON - darkcupid on March 21, 2004
    ok im asking nicely now....PLEASE UPDATE IVE HAD ENOUGH TORTURE FOR ONE DAY!!!
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  • From ANON - Anon on February 06, 2004
    cool please update a.s.a.p.
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  • From ANON - sean sierra on January 26, 2004
    upload the next chapter please i wanna see what happens to joey and yugi and DMG
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  • From on December 31, 2003
    I WUV THESE KIND OF PARINGS LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  • From ANON - AJAngelique on December 17, 2003
    OMG! That was HILLUS! US! But you need to go back and break the chapter up! It got confussing with the whole thing in one big block like that.
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  • From ANON - randomstranger on December 16, 2003
    *snickers* OMG that is seriously a fucked up story. I couldnt stop snickering! Wow..how hilarious! Be sure to separate the paragraphs next time!
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  • From ANON - Dchan on December 16, 2003
    This is a pretty interesting idea...you don't see much het in this fandom. [Mainly b/c the female characters are just...bleh. Anzu=annoying as hell, Mai=bitch, Isis=static, no character development] I personally prefer yaoi, but that's beside the point. And I like the 'freak accident frees a duel monster' thing. I would suggest reading more het lemons and getting a beta reader, though. There aren't that many spelling/grammar issues, but the writing itself could use some reworking. And if you used the less than/greater than signs to frame thoughts, you need to use a different symbol. The text box thing here treats stuff framed in those as html tags, and it won't actually show up in the text. And I don't know if you've actually looked at your published story here yet, but 1/2 of it is in italics. If you want to italicize a word, use 'greater than'i'less than' text to be in italics 'greater than'/i'less than'.
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