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Reviews for The Words Never Spoken

By : BruceMaxwell
  • From hermione494 on February 23, 2008
    This story was great! I really like Anikishipping! Though Spiritshipping is my favorite Yu-gi-oh GX yaoi pairing. You did a very good job on the sex scene too.
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  • From ValheruYaoi on February 10, 2008
    More!!!!! It was pretty good but spacing could have been improved. The worst part was grammar stuff. you did nice great sentences for the begining and then you did a paragraph with no breaks at all which meant reading a person rushed through it and it broke the flow of the story (the paragraph that starts with :::“You smell so amazing.” Just then Jaden picked up Syrus bridal style and kissed him once again but with more love and passion they kissed even when Jaden put Syrus on the bed with no wasted time Jaden started putting light feathered touches over Syrus’s chest and...:::) that one could definetly be fixed. you made the first sentence too long.

    Otherwise it was pretty good and keep it up. feel free to e-mail me if you want me to beta read and give suggestions for a potential future chapter. ValheruYaoi@yahoo.com
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  • From mistressofyaoi on May 26, 2007
    ooh i want to see this definatly continued, yaya for syrus/jaden smut!
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  • From SnowLeopard on January 23, 2007
    snleopard@yahoo.com Only if you'd like some help.
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  • From SnowLeopard on January 23, 2007
    This has potential but it was kinda hard to read with all the grammer, spelling and punctuation errors. It kinda needs to be beta'd. I'd be happy to help, if you'd like.

    I'd like for this story to be continued...
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  • From ANON - Retsu on December 13, 2006
    this its your first fanfic? well this its soooo cool! very good job! i hope you can add more chapters, cya! :3
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  • From ANON - Shacala on December 12, 2006
    no offence, but do you re-read what you type or do you just post it right after. There are a lot of grammer mistakes. I would seriously consider reading your writing before you post it, and maybe even getting a beta or just a friend to read over it and make sure that it sounds ok. It was an ok fic. and pretty good for a first try. It's nothing to rejoice about though. It needs a lot of work before it can be considered a good peice of work. I'm not saying any of this for spite or to be mean or because i got a bad review I really do believe that this fic. is not living up to it's potental. If you do need some help feel free to contact me my e-mail is cami611@yahoo.com just incase you can't get ahold of it.
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  • From Wicabeth on December 03, 2006
    Kinda reminds me of my GX stories. Good work for a first fic
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  • From ANON - acacia on December 02, 2006
    this is a good story and you should continue this
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  • From ANON - PEACHY on November 30, 2006
    Um... hey this is good though it was pretty fast it was entertaining to say the least, personally i don't read Sy/Ja but i guess this was a pretty good one.
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  • From ANON - Anon on November 29, 2006
    The story was good i like the way you displayed their feelings towards each other and I'm hoping that i get to see more chapters of this story cause i can tell its going to be good oh yeah and the title i don't know how you came up with it but its already a classic
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  • From ANON - RandomPerson on November 29, 2006
    The storyline was good...but you need to work on your grammar - a few full stops wouldn't hurt. Progressed a little fast, but I like the way you showed the character's feelings. Like the idwa, but it's just the structure and the punctuation that needs some improvements.
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