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Reviews for Shining Through the Rain

By : RebeccaRucker
  • From AxiaDrake on December 09, 2007
    It's a good story, it would be a shame to take it off the site
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  • From lapislazulai on November 15, 2007
    Ouch. You have a lot of work to do with your writing.

    You change tenses at least once, for starters. The style is severely lacking, and you need to re-evaluate the way you structure your sentences. Also, for lack of a better way to say this, the way you write and the adjectives you choose are just *lame*.

    "The idiots closed in on him."? "The thugs were no match for me and they ran off." Are you serious? It's flat out retarded.

    Work on your style, get yourself a good beta-reader. Please don't publish another THING until you get yourself straightened out.
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