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Reviews for Mine to love

By : dacori
  • From firelilly on January 13, 2010
    Over all your story has a lot of potential.

    However the plot was almost too fast paced and it was hard to fallow with all the single and double slashes meaning different things. Please use quotes for talking, after all it was what they were made for. Also don't have talking with the single slashes fight after thinking. It made it confusing as to which was which. You also need to space things out more. I understand that every writer has a different style and I respect that unless it is too confusing for the reader to fallow.

    Please don't take this the wrong way. I am just trying to help. It will be very hard for you to get and to keep readers if they can't fallow what is happening. Look at other stories and see how they format. It might be a good guide for you to fallow. Please keep trying because I honestly think you have talent but you just need to work on slowing the action down and making the format easier to read.

    Best of luck to you.

    firelilly
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