Unexamined Life | By : WhosJeebus Category: Yu-Gi-Oh > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 2579 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own YuGiOh!, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Title: Unexamined Life
Author: WhosJeebus
Rating: NC-17 (here there be smut - eventually)
Pairing(s): Seto/Joey, Tristan/Joey (with brief hints of Yugi/Téa, Joey/Mai, Tristan/Duke & Duke/Mai)
Beta: Jennie B. & AngryHamster (teaming up to save the world from bad grammar once again!)
Pairing(s): Seto/Joey, Tristan/Joey (with brief hints of Yugi/Téa, Joey/Mai, Tristan/Duke & Duke/Mai)
Spoilers: Slight mentions of the first episode, and also the ending of the anime series.
Disclaimer: Don’t own it. Would like to, but they won’t let me. Wonder if that restraining order is still in effect? Mr. Takahashi, it was all just a big misunderstanding, I swear...
Summary: Nearly fifteen years after being forced apart from the one he loves, Joey Wheeler reminisces on the events leading up to their separation, and holds onto a dim hope that they might one day be reunited. But, after hardships faced and conquered, can things ever really go back to the way they were?
A/N: This fic was written for the Love or Lies Anniversary Challenge at A Dragon's Lair Technically, it's a space age A/U with no specific setting, based loosely on a number of popular science fiction premises. It was tweaked and molded to fit the LOLAC criteria, which it was not originally intended for. However, the more I wrote on it, the more I thought, ‘this fic has everything to do with the passage of time and the memories we build in conjunction with, and about the people close to us.’ If that doesn’t just scream anniversary, then I don’t know what does… A number of things happened along the way, and I scrapped this idea in favour of another, but, eventually, I came full circle again. (I think) I’m glad that I did. Anyway, enjoy!
*** Special note on the A/U concept behind this fic: Though it DOES technically have a sci-fi premise, the futuristic aspects of this fic are meant to be a bare bones backdrop to the overall story itself. Do NOT expect to see wildly OOC behaviour, or ridiculous notions such as ‘Space Captain Kaiba Saves the Universe’. That’s all in the sequel, folks. Not. ***
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
“I didn’t kill her.”
The tall brunet was on his feet the second the doors had parted and he caught sight of a shock of bright golden hair emerging from between them.
Joey Wheeler sighed deeply as he stepped past the two large guards framed in the doorway, and into the small, confining space. He heard the pneumatic double doors slide closed behind him, the electronic lock engaging on the other side with an ominous *click*. He then found himself alone in the cell with his lover as silence hung oppressive in the stale, recycled air. Finally, Joey spoke:
“I know you didn’t, Seto.”
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
Joey startled awake suddenly, coming up hard against his seatbelt and stifling a low groan as his chest constricted painfully. The dream had been so vivid and tangible that it took him a few moments to re-orient himself to the proper time and place. Once his vision had managed to clear away the blurred residue of sleep, he realized that he was still firmly ensconced in his first class seat on board a private, outbound transport from Domino Colony. On their way to the Culver Beach Colony at sub-light speed, a small, unexpected asteroid shower had necessitated the use of the seat restraints, and still abysmally sleep deprived from his whirlwind press tour, Joey’s overtired brain had at last succumbed to his body’s demands for rest.
He must have been more exhausted than he had realized to have fallen asleep in such a stiff, uncomfortable position, but it was obvious that all the activity and excitement had finally caught up with him. Undoubtedly, his fatigued state of mind had had a hand in conjuring the previous, haunting images from the recesses of his subconscious, not to mention the massive amount of stress he’d been under lately. At least, that’s what he told himself anyway.
It was becoming harder with each passing cycle, denying that it was the same thing, the same resurrection of the past, that had manifested itself in this exact manner for over fourteen years now. The universe went about its regular business unmindful of his concerns, and as he approached the fifteenth anniversary of that fateful day, the sense memories, triggers and responses became stronger and more undeniable. Even now, it was as though the compartmentalized sections of his brain, the ones he’d walled off following the events of January 20th, regularly convened meetings to unanimously decide the method of his yearly torment. Arduously locked away and denied the access to influence his life, they had gradually begun to stir about, having judged the task of making him miserable to be a cause worthy of his subconscious mind’s efforts and pursuit. As he glanced furtively at the date on his watch, Joey knew his respite from himself was over.
The 18th of January already? Where had the past year disappeared to so quickly? Despite his denial, time marched inexorably onward, and for the other 347 days of the solar year, Joey was able to refute the power, the sheer inevitability, of those painful events, and focus on anything and everything besides the ticking time bomb of despair that awaited within. Some years, a random glance at the calendar would send some anonymous signal, triggering the landslide of memory and grief. Other times, more insidious but no less traumatic, the recollections would ambush him in his dreams, building in strength and intensity until his weary heart and mind perceived his nocturnal time travels as the TRUE reality; his waking world relegated to nothing more than a pale substitute. It seemed that this year would be of the latter variety.
Despite the foreboding date, Joey attributed the larger part of this latest bout of remembrance to Yugi’s most recent 'helpful' suggestion. Nearly two decades past their initial mentor and student relationship, Yugi was still attempting to gently nudge his best friend toward the path of enlightenment, happiness and confidence. Whenever they spoke, Yugi could be expected to drop any number of hints and not-so-subtle reminders that it was he, and he alone, who had always had Joey Wheeler’s best interests in mind.
"'Write a book', he says,’’ Joey murmured aloud to himself, doing a fair impression of Yugi’s high alto and eager enunciation. “It’ll be good for you.”
He had to laugh at this. Yugi had assumed that Joey found the notion ridiculous, and he certainly hadn't given his diminutive friend any reason to think otherwise. Oh sure, he’d been slightly affronted at Joey’s seeming outright rejection of the idea, but his feelings weren’t truly hurt. He was more than used to the blond’s stubborn insistence on living his life his OWN way, and whether or not Joey’s way was the easiest or the best was totally irrelevant.
Little did Yugi know that the book he was so gung-ho for Joey to write had already been penned some ten years prior. Inevitably, the manuscript was dedicated to Seto, and even though his current level of fame and high profile meant he’d have no problem finding a publisher, Joey had vowed never to release it until his former lover had been found. Which, in actuality, meant simply that the rough draft would moulder away in obscurity, forgotten by all except for the man who had authored it as a means of purging his own guilt and preserving the last remnants of a lost love. And really, was that such a loss? Though Joey himself had never given up the search, he’d long ago stopped asking himself exactly what he hoped to gain from it.
He shook himself roughly out of his maudlin thoughts, and debated the odds of a positive outcome if he were to face his demons head on. Who knew? It might just help him to finally move forward, to start living his life again. He must be beginning to feel his age, since he’d managed to convince himself that he was happy, these past few years. Wasn’t that what people were supposed to do at thirty-five? Build a life for themselves and their families, aim for a goal, look only to the future? It had never been that simple for him, though he’d thought it might have been, once upon a time. No, happiness was something that still managed to elude Joey Wheeler despite his successes, and now, in the wake of his dream, the illusion he’d surrounded himself with lay shattered around him, exposed as the fragile and crystalline structure it had always been.
Joey lowered his head and rubbed tiredly at his temples. This press tour had come at the worst possible time for him, and he cursed the unfortunate scheduling. He didn’t for one second regret his actions, or his decision to come out of retirement and accept the controversial case, but being out of the limelight for a number of years had softened him. The public hadn’t, as he’d hoped, forgotten his face or his activism, and his previous fame had been both a boon AND a bane in the trial against the young native of Tula, who stood falsely accused of spying for the Nivian Alliance.
Procuring an acquittal had not, in all honesty, been very hard work. The poor alien kid had been railroaded from the very beginning, and the case had garnered massive amounts of media attention. Joey soon found himself at the center of a firestorm of controversy and debate, hounded by newspapers and magazines, both local and system-wide, his visage plastered across animated billboards and vid screens in every Colony and holding. His strong beliefs and fervent words became nothing more than sound bites to be repeated again and again ad nauseum, and he found his footsteps shadowed by admirers and opponents alike.
This press tour had been another of Yugi’s brilliant ideas, he reflected glumly. Yugi, who knew first hand that hiding from fame most assuredly did NOT make it go away. But, Joey had already been down this road before, and he remained semi-reluctant to traverse it again. Still, in his experience, Joey had found that the best, most effective plan of action for dealing with the angry bull of an unwanted spotlight, was to just go ahead and lock horns with it. He planned on over-saturating the media with his presence and making his adoring public so very sick of his face and voice, that when the smoke finally cleared, he could safely burrow back into the comfort and isolation of obscurity and insignificance. Until the NEXT time, that is.
He gave a heartfelt sigh as he contemplated the utter and irrefutable truth of that realization. There would ALWAYS be a next time; of that he was certain. It was in his nature to fight against perceived injustice, and he’d made a promise that January day, nearly fifteen years ago now; it was a promise he had every intention of keeping, right up unto his dying day.
Lifting his head and seeing that the caution light had gone off, Joey unfastened his seatbelt and stiffly made his way over to the well-stocked minibar at the front of the cabin. As he leaned over, reaching into the small refrigerator for a bottle of water, he spied Tristan’s soundly sleeping form sprawled out awkwardly across the row of seats nearest the exit door. Smiling affectionately, Joey paused on his way back to his seat at the rear, bending down to stroke his husband’s dark hair back and press a gentle kiss to his forehead. Tristan wrinkled his brow briefly, muttering nonsense and turning over onto his side, even as he resumed his quiet, even breathing. The brunet didn’t travel nearly as often as Joey himself did, and as a result, his body’s internal clock resisted any sort of deviation from Galderma Prime mean time more strenuously than Joey’s own.
He’d tried, albeit with half a heart, to talk Tristan out of coming along on this trip, knowing full well that he’d be dreadfully morose company this time of year, as well as insanely preoccupied with various meetings, public appearances, and press conferences. But his husband was nothing if not loyal, even to a fault, as he far too often set aside his own needs and desires to accommodate those of his love’s. If experience was anything to go by, Joey figured that he’d probably been talking in his sleep again, and it was most likely this ever-present, ever-painful reminder of his heart’s first owner that had driven Tristan to seek refuge elsewhere in the posh transport ship’s spacious cabin.
As he settled himself back into the comfortable upholstery, Joey spared a moment of sympathy for his agent, his legion of staff and assistants, and various other hangers-on crowded into other compartments of the ship, but he shrugged it off just as quickly. He really couldn’t be bothered to deal with any lingering guilt over the issue. After all, he’d gotten to where he was today by overcoming adversity, through years of hard work and dedication, and he valued his privacy above all else. Tristan was the one of the few people he allowed into his personal sanctuary, and even HE knew to make himself scarce when Joey was in his annual throes of remembrance. Hence the strategic retreat to more isolated sleeping accommodations.
In all fairness, he WAS vaguely ashamed that those closest to him felt the need to tiptoe around him cautiously every year at this time, but Joey could not change who he was, who Seto had made him, nor would he even WANT to, if given the chance. It was all he had left to cling to, and Tristan had entered into their relationship with full knowledge of his lover’s past, eyes wide open and full of acceptance and compassion. 'Damaged goods', he’d joked once, and only once, after seeing the hurt flash across the blond’s face at the careless words, and Joey himself didn’t have it in him to disagree with the assessment.
Sipping his water and brooding silently, Joey made the conscious decision to not let his husband’s sacrifices go in vain. These memories haunted him for a reason, and a very specific one at that. They were his cross to bear, shouldered willingly so long ago, accepted the very day he had been forced to say good-bye, as well as come to the most painful decision of his life. The decision to walk away from the only true happiness he had ever known.
Reclining his seat as far back as it would go, Joey Wheeler closed his eyes and remembered:
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
“I know you didn’t, Seto.”
It broke Joey’s heart a little to see Seto nodding and looking so pathetically grateful for those few kindly spoken words of reassurance. Though his pride was still evident in his posture and mannerisms, Joey couldn’t help but view his lover through a critical eye. He seemed almost broken, and the very thought that there could be ANYTHING in existence capable of bringing the great Seto Kaiba this low made his throat constrict with terror.
Never taking his eyes from Joey’s face, Seto stepped back to seat himself stiffly on the edge of the cell’s only furnishings, a narrow pallet too sparse to be called a proper bed. Joey felt an irresistible urge to propel himself forward and wrap his lover in a comforting embrace, but despite the defeated slump to his shoulders, Seto’s posture remained stiff, something in his overall demeanour warning Joey off.
The brunet sat with his knees pressed tightly together and his hands fidgeting restlessly in his lap, giving off waves of uncertainty and causing Joey’s apprehension to grow. At least he seemed to be drawing SOME measure of comfort from the pointless movements, though his deep, blue eyes were wide and caused him to appear almost frightened. The dark circles beneath them only helped to highlight the fragile expression that sat so alien on his handsome features. It was this expression, coupled with the tremulous smile of relief that had lit Seto’s face when the open doors first heralded his arrival, that had frightened Joey the most.
Had he done something to cause Seto to doubt him...? Granted, he was terrified of what was about to happen, but Seto’s uncharacteristically timid behaviour unnerved him more than any of the traumatic occurrences of the past week. At a loss for words, and desperate to keep the tremor out of his voice, Joey stammered, “I’m sorry, but even with Yugi’s influence, this was the first time they’ve let me in to see you. I’ve only got an hour…” he trailed off, looking apologetic.
Apparently, those were the magic words that Seto needed to hear, enabling him to shed his former, hesitant persona as easily as if he were shrugging off his trademark full length coat. “I’m relieved you’re even here at all. I’ve been worried sick that you’d bought into their lies, what with all their so-called ‘evidence’ to back them up.” He snorted derisively, and Joey was treated to a brief glimpse of the Seto Kaiba he knew and loved. “I was beginning to think that you believed the nonsense they were spewing; that you actually thought me capable of -- “
“Seto, stop. We - we can’t DO this. There’s… no time.” Joey’s carefully schooled his attitude to appear vaguely businesslike as he fixed the other boy with a firm gaze. “I’ve come to talk to you about your options.”
Before he could even begin laying out the facts, he was interrupted by a bark of incredulous laughter.
“Options? Joey, there AREN’T any. The court has handed down their sentence, and it’s final. That’s all there is to it.”
“NO! You gotta stop thinkin’ like that, dammit!” Joey turned away from Seto, addressing the smooth, blank metal of the wall as stinging hot tears threatened to spill forth. “I’ve talked with Tris, and together we think we’ve pieced together why Mai contacted you in the first place.” Joey began to gradually warm to his subject, forgetting his audience for the time being. He welcomed the excuse to take his mind off of his lover’s impending fate, to feel like he was accomplishing SOMETHING. He rummaged through the front pockets of his jeans, emerging with double handfuls of scribbled notes, which he consulted as he paced back and forth across the tiny cell. “Tristan even thinks it has somethin' to do with Duke’s accident. Well, actually, turns out that it wasn't really an acci--”
“Joey, quit it.” Seto’s calm, level command cut through the blond’s chatter. “There’s no point to this, don’t you get it? We’re never going to see each other again after tonight. Can’t you just sit down and BE with me, at least for the little time we have left?”
Joey heaved a loud and mournful sigh as he shoved the scraps of paper back into his pockets. After running his fingers agitatedly through his messy hair a few times, he plunked himself down on the bed next to Seto and did his best to sound confident as opposed to merely placating. “You know that’s why I’m here. But I haven‘t given up yet, either.” He leaned his shoulder into Seto’s, reaching up with both hands to gently turn his face until their lips met.
Seto exhaled sharply, his breath shuddering against Joey’s mouth, and then he was crushing them together, his lips and teeth everywhere on Joey’s face and neck, kissing him, devouring him hungrily. Joey couldn’t help but respond in kind, parting his lips eagerly when Seto’s hot tongue demanded entrance, only to throw his head back in ecstasy a moment later when the brunet suddenly dove lower and bit down hard, just above the pulse point in his throat.
It seemed that Seto couldn’t keep his attention focused on any part of his lover for more than a few seconds at a time, his hands scrabbling frantically at Joey’s clothing, or tangling in his hair, only to move away again in a desperate search for something more tangible to hold on to. Joey felt overwhelmed, consumed by Seto’s passion and need. The kissing, the clinging, the sensation that Seto was trying to climb right inside his skin with him seemed to last forever, but was over with far too soon. Seto pulled back abruptly, placing one palm against Joey’s flushed cheek and panting heavily. Searing blue met brown as Seto slowly regained his composure, staring down at his lover with undiminished fire burning brightly from his eyes. Caressing his thumb over Joey’s cheekbone, he opened moist, kiss-swollen lips and breathed out, “Joey, I --”
Behind them, the double doors slid open again almost soundlessly, revealing the form of Yugi Moto, standing awkwardly between the two burly guards. As he stepped inside, he had the grace to look embarrassed at discovering his two friends in such a compromising position, but he quickly settled his face into his usual, compassionate smile.
“I’m sorry to interrupt, guys. I came down as soon as the Ruling Council finished with their deliberations.”
The hand on Joey’s cheek snaked down and twined around his fingers instead. Squeezing gently, Seto asked, “And?”
Yugi’s eyes slid away briefly. “Not a single one of them voted with me.”
All three faces fell at these words, Seto managing to look both discouraged and unsurprised at the same time. Joey knew that Seto had stopped relying on other people ages ago. Yugi , Mokuba and himself were really the only exceptions to this rule, although his love for Joey had blinded him to most of the blond’s faults by now. Their passion for arguing and the powerful emotions they had formerly channeled into their fierce competitiveness had morphed into an all-consuming hunger and devotion that rendered propriety and rational thought a near impossibility when they were together. Seto may not have been able to hide his disappointment from the two of them, but the fact that he didn’t even bother to TRY covering his reaction illustrated the changes he had undergone in the past year. Joey spared a moment’s thought to reflect proudly on the obvious fruits of his influence before he remembered that everything was about to be lost...
Unbeknownst to Joey, Seto found himself thinking along much the same lines. The previous months he had spent with the blond, learning him, loving him, had changed him on a fundamental level that couldn’t be perceived by the casual observer. But, it wasn’t Joey alone who had influenced these changes in Seto, even though he HAD accomplished the unthinkable in teaching Seto to be more open with his feelings and with himself. Yugi had done his part as well, so much so that now Seto had hardly any trouble at all in bringing himself to admit a grudging admiration for his former rival.
He had to accede that Yugi had guile and ambition to spare; something he’d not thought the diminutive duelist had possessed in such large quantities when they’d first met. At only twenty-one, becoming the youngest Council member in all the recorded history of the Colonies was quite the impressive feat; just the thing to impress the accomplished young man who had been a child prodigy at eight, boy billionaire at ten, and self-made CEO at the age of fourteen. But what made Yugi unique in Seto’s mind was the fact that all of his successes had come with a price, the same as it had been for Seto himself. Nothing had come easy to Yugi, and despite all the uphill battles he‘d had to struggle through, nothing had deterred him from his goal.
In fact, Yugi sat on the Ruling Council through a cruel twist of fate, finishing out the late Solomon Moto’s incomplete term. After his grandfather’s sudden death from a heart attack, Yugi had made the decision to run for office and was voted in with surprising ease. The rest of the Council tended to view Yugi as a joke, a mascot even, despite the fact that he had won the election based on his own merit and NOT out of nepotism and bribery, as a number of the other members had.
From their first very introduction, Seto had been left standing on the sidelines, watching dumbstruck as Yugi worked his various miracles. Whether it was summoning Exodia to the field on day one, or demonstrating the courage to duel his ancient Egyptian counterpart, effectively saying good-bye and sealing him in the past, Yugi had never ceased to awe Seto with his fortitude and exhaustive efforts at winning. His ever-cheerful disposition disguised a core of iron, and he now counted Yugi among the few and proud souls who were able to refer to Seto Kaiba as ‘friend’.
These days, Yugi was working miracles of a different sort, struggling to make his voice heard over those of the other, more self-serving members of the Council of Rulers. Members who claimed to fairly govern the multitude of Earth Colonies strewn about the solar system, but who, in reality, did nothing more than promote their own interests while simultaneously lining the pockets of their sycophants and cronies. Yugi had turned his formidable powers of persuasion and do-gooder sense of optimism toward eliminating these corrupt officials in an effort to affect change on a larger scale than Seto had ever thought possible, even for someone of Yugi’s level of prowess and determination.
But now, it seemed as if Yugi’s endless supply of miracles had finally run out. When he’d come to Seto that first night in prison, ablaze with righteous indignation and outraged fervor to see justice prevail, he’d made such a strong case for how and why it was unthinkable for this travesty to continue, that Seto had been convinced it would only be a matter of hours before he was released, with apologies and a red carpet to see him on his way. Now, one week later, with his sentence to be carried out the very next day, Seto didn’t feel quite so invincible anymore. Nevertheless, he took what meager comfort he could from having Yugi so steadfastly in his corner. It was something, and even if he WAS pathetically grateful for it, there was really no need for anyone else to know more than he was willing to let on.
Joey, on the other hand, might just be a different story. The blond had been happy to see him again; that much was obvious. But, did he TRULY believe Seto’s proclaimed innocence? He turned a searching gaze on his lover, willing him to meet his eyes and allow Seto access to the truths hidden there, but all his attention was focused on Yugi at the moment. The news of Seto’s denied appeal seemed to have ignited a fire in the other boy.
Joey jumped up from the bed, yanking Seto’s arm along with him. He turned a questioning glance on the brunet, who shrugged, but adamantly refused to release his grip. “So... is that it? We can’t be out of options already, Yug’!” When Yugi did not immediately reply, Joey became even more incensed. He tried to jerk his hand free from Seto’s, to no avail. “No! I refuse to accept that we’re just gonna sit back and let them --” he choked up, unable to voice his fears. He looked away angrily and used his free hand to swipe at the tears leaking from the corners of his eyes.
Seto tugged on Joey’s arm, pulling him back down on the bed and wrapping him in a tight embrace. The blond buried his face in Seto’s chest and sobbed brokenly, all pretense of restraint gone once he felt his lover’s arms about him.
Yugi clasped his hands behind his back and retreated a few steps to lean against the wall, seeming both anguished and uncomfortable at being the bearer of bad news.
Seto leaned down, murmuring low, comforting nonsense words in Joey’s ear, and then pressed a soft kiss to the back of his head. He looked up at Yugi over the tousled golden mane and asked, “What about Mokuba? Did you ask if they’d be willing to wait until he could be sent for?”
“A few of the Council members were sympathetic,” Yugi began, “Until I informed them that Mokuba was in school at Juniper Colony, and it would take at least three weeks for him to get here on the earliest transport.”
Joey lifted his tear-streaked face to stare at Seto in dismay. He struggled visibly, attempting to pull his scattered emotions back together for Seto’s sake. “Oh Seto, I’m sorry. I’ve been so selfish! I never thought for one second about Mokuba! I didn’t even contact him to let him know when you were -- when they told me...” He trailed off, lower lip trembling.
“Shhh...” Seto soothed, wiping away stray tears with his thumbs. He mused on how he’d been so very traumatized and upset before Joey had arrived, pacing his cell like a caged animal and railing at the world for the unfairness of it all. HE had been the one needing comfort and reassurance, but now he realized that Joey had gone him one better, by giving him someone to comfort instead. Seeing to his lover’s needs was the one thing guaranteed to take his mind off of his impending fate.
He gazed down at Joey fondly, his words quiet but clearly audible. “I knew the high likelihood of their refusal, and as always, I was one step ahead.” He gave a ghostly version of his trademark smirk as he released his hold on Joey to reach beneath the pillows at the head of the bed. He pulled out a thick sheaf of folded papers, filled from margin to margin with small, precise lettering. He stood up and walked stiffly over to where Yugi still stood with his back up against the wall. “Yugi, thank you for all you’ve done for me. You’ve been a true and loyal friend throughout all of this.”
The smaller boy looked taken aback at the solemn words, though his smile was no less warm for it.
“I suspect you never thought to hear those words from ME, did you?” Seto laughed softly. His question was already answered, as Yugi’s shocked expression had merely confirmed it for him. “Well, I mean them sincerely, though they’re coming too late. I figured I’d try to ‘slip them in under the wire’, as it were.”
Joey frowned at the dark humour evident in his lover’s voice, and he opened his mouth to protest such an offhand, morbid statement. It didn’t do to go ‘whistling past the graveyard’, so to speak. “Seto --”
Seto held up one slim hand. “Hush. I’m not finished yet.” He turned back to Yugi. “I have one more favour to ask of you, if you’re willing.”
“Anything I can do, Seto. You know that.”
He held out the papers for Yugi to take. “Then please make sure Mokuba gets this letter when he arrives, if you would. And let him know that I was thinking of him, always.”
Yugi reached up to place one hand briefly on Seto’s shoulder, before accepting the papers and stuffing them inside his coat pocket carefully. “He already knows, Seto. He knows.”
All Joey could do during this exchange was watch with a horror-struck expression on his face, looking back and forth between the other two men in disbelief. Seto could tell that Yugi wanted to offer some form of comfort to his best friend, but held back because he knew it wouldn’t be accepted. For Joey, reality had not yet sunk in.
As Yugi turned toward the door, he addressed Joey directly. “I did the best I could Joey, but the Council has refused to grant Seto an appeal or to overturn his sentence. You have special permission to stay with him tonight, but I’m afraid only family and Council members are allowed at the... procedure,” he finished lamely.
Joey surged to his feet, fists clenched at his side. “Shut up! Stop sayin’ things like that!” He whirled on Seto, next. “BOTH of you! You can't just -- You don’t KNOW!”
Yugi took a step forward, reaching for Joey, who jerked away from the outstretched hand only to collapse in the middle of the floor. As the blond’s renewed sobs reached their ears, Seto took pity on his guilt-stricken friend.
“It’s OK, Yugi. I’ll take care of him.”
Yugi looked uncertain for a moment.
“It’s alright; trust me. You should go on home; I’m sure Té
a is worried sick by now. You probably ran out the door without an explanation when they called the emergency session, didn’t you?” Once again, Yugi’s easily apparent, decidedly sheepish, expression gave him away. How the man had come to the conclusion that politics were his destiny was completely beyond even Seto’s formidable intellect.
Yugi sent a grim, closed-mouthed smile Seto’s way before he pushed the intercom button and asked the guards to let him out. He shuffled his feet restlessly, giving Seto one last glance and a solemn nod. “I’ll see you in the morning, Seto. Joey, if you need anything...” Yugi looked away, unsure of how to wrap up his well-meaning sentiment. Instead, he murmured a barely heard, “Farewell,” before exiting the cell with his head lowered.
Once the door had closed again behind him, the only sounds in the small room came from Joey’s continued crying and Seto’s own footsteps as he strolled casually around the figure huddled on the ground. Seating himself back on the bed, he took a few moments to stare down at Joey impassively. Watching his lover as he lay doubled over, his thin body wracked with harsh, braying sobs, Seto was hard-pressed to keep from breaking down himself. He didn’t have the luxury or the time however, and now, neither did Joey.
Seto leaned back on the pillows, crossing his arms over his chest and splaying his legs out before him on the bed. He took a deep breath. “Joey.”
Joey twisted his head slightly, so that one tear-rimmed brown eye stared balefully at Seto from under the crook of his arm. In place of a response, the eye vanished again just as quickly as it had appeared.
Seto sighed deeply. “Joey, get up.”
Keeping his face hidden, Joey shook his head furiously, the sobs coming even more loudly and ragged than before. Seto knew from experience that there was only one line to take with Joey, when he was like this, though he dreaded doing it. Joey was the very reason he’d left his former, cold persona behind in the first place, and he hated that he was able to slip back into the role so easily when needed.
“Joseph Anthony Wheeler,” he said in a hard voice, watching in satisfaction as Joey stilled his thrashing at the use of his full name. “You’re acting like a spoiled child, and you KNOW it.” The sobs began to taper off, but Joey stubbornly refused to look up at Seto as he spoke.
Springing up lightly from the bed, Seto gave a soft snort as he strolled over to gaze down at Joey in derision. He hovered over the prone form, pacing with his hands behind his back, his words dripping with invective. “Weak. Pathetic. Sniveling.” With each pass, each heaped upon insult, Joey’s spine stiffened a little more, until his sobs had died out and only the barest hitching of his breath remained. Yet he STILL refused to face his lover. “All the things I called you back when we were enemies...” Seto began, “I guess they were true after all.”
Joey finally turned to look at Seto, shock and hurt plainly visible upon his face, along with the barest beginnings of anger. Seto ceased his pacing long enough to toe Joey’s hip with his boot, shoving him off balance and over onto his side. He knelt down on his haunches and stared straight into the other’s liquid amber eyes. “Joey, I love you more than life itself, but if you’re going to roll over and show your underbelly at the first sign of adversity, then you’re not the same person I fell in love with, all those months ago.”
Unmindful of the disadvantages of his prone position, Joey immediately went on the attack. “First sign of adversity...?!” He shoved forcefully at Seto, toppling the taller boy back onto his rear. “You have an extremely selective fuckin' memory, you ASS!” he spat, knuckling away the remaining tears from the corners of his eyes with one hand, and pointing an accusing finger at Seto with the other. “YOU were the one tellin' ME to just give up not twenty fuckin' minutes ago! I swear to God, Seto, sometimes you are the biggest hypocrite that I have ever --”
Tuning out Joey’s tirade, Seto brought a hand up to cover the small smile just beginning to break over his face. Joey Wheeler, and his uncanny ability to go from emotional train wreck to willfully belligerent in less than three point five seconds, had never ceased to amaze him.
Pausing to take a breath, Joey observed Seto’s reaction and narrowed his eyes dangerously. “Wait a sec. Are you LAUGHIN’ at me??”
Unable to suppress his mirth any longer, Seto burst out in amused laughter, his delight only heightened by the blond’s outraged indignity. Oh God, it felt wonderful to laugh again, to be like this with Joey, to feel normal once more, if only for a brief time. He’d spent the past week hoping against hope that this had all been a horrible nightmare, that he would wake up, warm and groggy, tucked safely in his own bed with Joey’s body wrapped tightly about him. This, now, was the first genuine moment that had felt real, the one thing he wouldn’t gladly give back, since this entire tragedy had begun playing itself out. It was at once both a blessing and a curse, because it brought home to him with full force exactly what he had to give up.
Joey pulled himself up on his knees, glaring at the brunet with a mixture of confusion and irritation. Seto merely shook his head fondly at him and asked smugly, “Feeling any better?” Joey’s petulant frown only deepened, and this gave Seto another excuse to chuckle. “Nearly a year together and you’re still just as easy to manipulate. I can read you like a book, Wheeler.”
“Hmmph. But I thought you always said I was ‘unpredictable in my predictability’,” Joey pouted, gracing Seto with a hesitant half-smile.
“I was only humouring you so you‘d put out.”
The red flush that suffused Joey’s cheeks sent Seto into further gales of laughter. Chagrined, but ever-forgiving, the blond stood and wrapped his arms about Seto’s waist, leaning his head into his lover’s chest. He sighed yet again, a breathy, forlorn sound, and buried his face in Seto’s plain, black t-shirt. Nipping at the soft fabric with his teeth and lips, Joey let his hands wander up underneath the shirt, feeling the smooth muscles in Seto’s back contract at the cool touch. His voice was muffled as he asked, “Seto, what are we gonna DO?”
Dimly, Seto’s mind registered that Joey had spoken, but he was too lost in the pleasant sensations coursing through his body to immediately respond. It felt SO good to be touched again. For as long as he could remember, people had been intimidated by his cold and standoffish attitude, even when he was only a child. And now, after the past week’s events, everyone looked at him like he was a leper. But to Joey, he had always been just Seto. OK, so he’d occasionally been known as ‘Moneybags’ or ‘Pompous Ass’ or even ‘You Obnoxious Prick’, but Joey Wheeler had only ever SEEN the boy that was to become his friend, his lover and his soul mate. He’d never been viewed as anything less than human, for which Seto would be eternally grateful. He found it difficult to believe he’d actually entertained the notion that Joey might reject him after hearing the jury’s verdict...
“Seto?”
The brunet leaned down, his mouth nuzzling at Joey’s neck, his hands drifting lower until they brushed against the seat of Joey’s jeans, cupping the rounded buttocks and pulling the smaller boy flush against his body. “Hmmm...?” he murmured against sweat-damp skin.
“I asked you a question.”
“Oh.“ Seto lifted his head, blinking rapidly as he thought back. “Do? There’s nothing TO do. We’ve got tonight, and that’s it. We should try to make the most of it.” He emphasized his point by grabbing Joey’s hand and pressing it against the hardened flesh between his own legs.
Joey jerked his arm back, pulling away and glaring up at Seto. “I can’t believe you’re thinkin’ about sex at a time like this!”
“You started it!” the brunet spat out defensively. He decided to try a joking tactic instead, as he pulled Joey to him once more. “Come on. Think of it as a last request?” Seto realized his mistake when Joey sucked in a huge breath of air and looked horrified. He planted both hands flat against the taller boy’s chest and shoved.
Seto didn’t try to resist, merely giving out a frustrated grunt as he toppled backwards onto the bed in a boneless heap. “Fine! You know, YOU have the option of waltzing out that door and back to your life any time you damn well please.”
“Are you sayin' you want me to leave?” Tears welled up in the amber eyes once more, and Seto felt an irrational surge of anger at the sight of them.
“NO!! I haven’t even been within arm’s reach of you for over a week now; I’m going crazy from the isolation, and I just want to hold you again, make love to you one last time! Why is that so god-damned WRONG??” Flinging himself back onto his pillows, Seto threw an arm up over his eyes and turned to face the wall.
Joey stared down at him for the space of two heartbeats before he crossed over to sit at the foot of the bed. “I know, Seto. And believe me, I’d like nothin’ more, but I can’t stand feelin’ like this, like there’s something I could be doin’ to FIX everything. I want to make it all alright again.” As he spoke, Joey carefully unbuckled Seto’s boots and set them on the floor. He made short work of his socks as well, pulling the long, elegant feet into his lap and giving Seto a serious look. “Me and Tris, we dug up so MUCH information. It explains everything, proves your innocence, and exposes the whole fuckin' mess, but no one will LISTEN.”
“I’ll listen.”
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
Joey awoke slowly to the sensation of a warm hand gently nudging his shoulder. He blinked furiously against the bright overhead light that attempted to creep beneath his barely parted lashes.
“Joey? You awake, babe?”
“Wha...? Tris? M’blind...”
“Shit. Sorry ‘bout that.” The blissful half-gloom of the transport ship’s interior was restored as Tristan reached over Joey’s head and flipped the switch. “Better?”
“Much. What’s up? We there yet?”
Tristan flopped down in the seat to Joey’s left, nearest the window. He lifted the shade and pointed out into space. “Sorta.”
Raising his seat back up and leaning over Tristan’s lap, Joey saw that their transport was currently waiting at the end of a long queue encircling an orbital space dock. He clearly recognized the planet below from his previous visit to the Culver Beach Colony, but he couldn’t recall ever seeing a port THIS busy anywhere in all his travels. “What the hell is goin’ on down there?”
Tristan shrugged. “Don’t have a clue. The pilot came back a few minutes ago and said that all he’d been told was that it was some kinda customs snafu. The long and short of it is that we’re stuck here in orbit for the five hours they estimate it’s gonna take to straighten things out.”
Huffing in exasperation, Joey exclaimed, “That’s just great! We’ll barely make the press conference as it is! And we might as well just say ‘fuck off’ to any chance of bein’ able to check in to the hotel first!”
“Whoa. Sounds like someone didn’t get enough beauty rest. Everything OK?” The brunet put a hand out to touch Joey’s cheek, his voice moving smoothly from joking to concerned.
Joey smiled wanly and grasped his husband’s hand with his own, bringing it to his lips for a chaste kiss. “Sorry, it’s just...” he trailed off, uncertain how to continue. He settled for looking Tristan in the eye and stating simply, “It’s the eighteenth.”
Tristan made a low noise in the back of his throat. “Wrong. It’s the nineteenth in this quadrant. We’ve gained a whole extra day on the way here.” Joey didn’t seem terribly pleased at this revelation, so Tristan decided to try a different tack. “We could, uh, pull the rest of the shades down while I try to take your mind off of it, “ he offered suggestively. “Might kill some time, anyway.”
Laughing, Joey released the hand he was holding so that he could wrap an arm about the brunet’s shoulders and pull him over into a heated kiss. When they finally parted, Joey rested his forehead against Tristan’s and breathed out, “As much as I appreciate the offer, I’ve got one bitch of a headache at the moment.”
Snorting, Tristan stood up and languidly stretched his arms above head. “Like I’ve never heard THAT one before.”
“You haven't. At least not from me anyways, since I always give it up. Who are you bangin’ on the side, Tris?”
“Your momma.”
Growling, Joey tossed his empty water bottle at Tristan’s retreating back as the other man scurried for ample cover. “How old are you? Twelve?”
A dark head popped up from a few rows in front of Joey. “Heh. You left that one wide open. Besides, I married you so we could be juvenile together for the rest of our lives. Since you’re not laughing, you must finally be growing up on me.”
“Never. You can come back out now; I’m all outta ammo.”
“I don’t believe youuu...” the brunet taunted in a sing-song voice as he crept out into the aisle on his hands and knees. “I think I’ll come over there and frisk you, just to make sure.”
“Tristan Taylor, I swear to God, if you try to tickle me again I will put my foot up your ass.”
“Ooh, kinky.”
“Knew YOU’D think so,” Joey snarked, leaning back against the headrest. He grimaced, closing his eyes tightly as he massaged his temples with firm strokes of his fingertips.
Tristan’s playful demeanour turned serious as he crawled over to Joey’s side. “Can I get you anything? It’s not another migraine, is it? Honestly, I told you this press tour would be too much. I mean, couldn’t we have just --”
“Tris’, it’s OK. I'm OK. I just need a little more sleep.”
The brunet nodded his head in agreement, then dipped down to place a quick kiss on Joey’s lips. “Good thing I brought a book with me. You’re shit for company on this road trip.”
Joey took a half-hearted swipe at Tristan as the other man stood and made his way back to the front of the cabin.
“Love ya, babe. I‘ll be up here if you need me.”
“Love you too, Tris, and I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Get some sleep.”
Joey reclined his seat once more and blanked his mind, knowing his thoughts would inevitably drift to where they wanted to go; where they ALWAYS wanted to go at this time of year. The day his very world had come to an end and his life had changed irrevocably...
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
He stood numbly amongst the crowded throng outside the courtroom, not really aware of his surroundings except for the comforting touch of Yugi’s hand on his elbow. Whenever the crowd moved forward an inch, Joey did too, mechanically placing one foot in front of the other. When they reached the imposing, dark-paneled double doors, Yugi showed his identification to the bailiff, indicating Joey with a sweep of his hand, but none of the words exchanged made any sense to the blond. The bailiff nodded brusquely at Yugi and quickly ushered Joey inside, away from the milling mass of reporters and would-be spectators.
The court room was eerily hushed, despite the shoulder to shoulder seating and the presence of a number of additional reporters and their camera crews. Joey turned to ask Yugi where they should sit, when he suddenly became aware of the fact that he was alone. Vaguely, he recalled his friend mentioning that he wouldn’t be allowed in during the proceedings, due to the possibility that the Ruling Council might be called upon to hear an appeal in various, special circumstances. None of this had really registered with Joey when he’d first been informed of it, and he’d spent pretty much the entire span of time since receiving Yugi’s frantic phone call in something of a fugue state. He viewed everything through frosted glass; every sound that reached his ears seemed muffled by layers upon layers of wool. The world turned around him in slow motion, and Joey couldn’t quite bring himself to notice or care. He had to see Seto, he had to know if what Yugi had said was true...
He finally took a seat in the rear of the courtroom, on what he hoped was the defendant’s side, but he really had no way of knowing at this point. He sat with his head bowed and shoulders ramrod straight as he tried to piece together the fractured shards of his life. None of this felt like it could truly be happening, but he’d already spent more than enough time trying desperately to wake himself from his worst nightmare made real.
The call had come not long after Joey himself had phoned Yugi at three A.M. Sunday morning, panicked after Seto had not returned home from the office following an afternoon of Saturday meetings and general catching up. He wasn't answering his cell phone, and he hadn’t called, either, so Joey was well past the point of panic when he’d spoken with his friend, frantically informing him that he’d already checked every hospital emergency room in the district, and please, PLEASE, was there anything Yugi could do to help? All he knew was that Seto’s secretary had seen him leaving Kaiba Corp headquarters around six PM, and the parking garage attendant could attest to the fact that Seto’s Porsche had checked out around fifteen minutes later.
Yugi had promised to do anything in his power to find Seto, and this had quieted Joey’s fears somewhat. He knew from experience that his best friend could fix just about anything that went wrong in Joey’s life, so he was at least becalmed by Yugi’s reassurances that everything would be just fine. Then Yugi had betrayed his trust by phoning some two hours later to inform him that Seto had been arrested for murder. And not just ANY murder; Seto’s alleged victim was none other than Mai Valentine herself.
Now, a little more than twenty-four frantic, sleepless hours later, Joey was sitting numbly on a wooden bench, still waiting for someone to tell him what the FUCK was going on. Yugi hadn’t been able to find out much, but at least he’d been able to get Joey in to observe the actual trial itself. It still amazed him to think that, long before he was born, people actually had to wait months and sometimes even YEARS for a case to come before a judge and jury. With the advent of the Mnemonic Display Device, or MDD, as it was commonly known, criminal trials were simply a matter of filing the right paperwork and making sure all parties involved showed up at the right time and place. The MDD had eliminated the need for lengthy investigations, witnesses, and in most cases, even expert testimony. A jury in situ was really the only factor that required any amount of time to put together, and even then, it was a task easily accomplished in under a day. Though Joey himself had never witnessed a real trial, or seen the MDD in practical use, he was aware that it was a speedy process from start to finish. He tried to tell himself that this was a good thing, and it meant that Seto would be acquitted all the more quickly so that Joey could take him back home where he belonged. Their one year anniversary was coming up in a matter of days and they had big plans...
Everyone in the court room abruptly stood up, and after a moment’s hesitation, Joey did too. The man in the row directly in front of him was obviously a Belorian, being that he was half again as tall as he was wide, and Joey struggled to peer around the enormous alien to see what was happening. Then the bailiff from outside the door was making his way up the aisle to the front of the courtroom, instructing them all to be seated once more. He caught the phrase ‘court is now in session‘, and ‘the Honourable Judge Harry Preston presiding’, but the rest was just meaningless chatter. When the Belorian sat down again, Joey was able to see that the judge had arrived and settled in, as had the prosecutor and the defense attorney, a man Joey recognized from a number of previous Kaiba Corp business and social functions. Joey was relieved to note that he had indeed chosen the correct side of the courtroom.
Joey’s breath froze in his lungs as a door on the left opened and Seto was brought in, striding arrogantly ahead of the security officers who attempted to escort him. In spite of the handcuffs that he wore as if they were a designer accessory, the defiant smirk firmly in place on that handsome face left no doubt as to who was in charge, and who was merely a barely tolerated entourage. He looked beautiful, Joey thought, despite the fading bruise that marred one delicate cheekbone, all insolence and confidence. In fact, Seto seemed ready to take on the world, and God help anyone who got in his way.
He paused a moment as he stood before the defense table, allowing one of the guards to unlock his restraints and taking a moment to turn his fierce scowl on the gathered crowd . His eyes lit up as they fell on Joey, who was still standing dumbstruck at the back of the room, paralyzed with shock and struggling to make sense of what he was seeing. Seto’s scowl transformed into a tremulously reassuring smile when the blond met and matched the intensity of his gaze, but that smile faltered and faded away altogether as his lover showed no outward indication of returning it. Frowning once more, Seto turned to face the front of the courtroom as he gracefully swept his long coat out of the way and settled into the chair next to his attorney.
Joey’s legs gave out underneath him, and he plopped back down in his seat with a soft grunt. He’d literally been immobilized at the sight of his lover, the reality of the situation had crashed down upon him all at once, and he’d been wholly unable to acknowledge or respond to Seto’s heartbreaking gesture. Now, all he could do was stare stupidly at the back of that beloved auburn head, silently begging for Seto to turn around and smile at him again. He hated himself for needing the comfort he knew only Seto could provide, and wished he could be the strong one, just this once.
Seto appeared visibly shaken by his lover’s lack of response, and his lawyer had apparently picked up on it as well. The man put a hand on Seto’s wrist, leaning over slightly to whisper in one ear as the brunet nodded tersely in agreement, his CEO mask reaffixed to his face and meeting everyone’s stares evenly once more.
There was a sudden flurry of activity on the prosecutor’s side as the assistant District Attorney stood up and began to read the charges against Seto. The legal jargon mostly flew over Joey’s head, but one phrase stood out in his mind with crystal clarity:
Second degree murder.
The judge interrupted at this point, shuffling through the papers in his hands and asking, “I thought we were hearing a case for voluntary manslaughter, Mr. Marcus. Has something changed?”
The ADA cleared his throat and answered respectfully, “Yes, Your Honour, that WAS the situation at the time of the arraignment. However, the state has decided to forego manslaughter and up the charge to murder in the second. Forensic evidence suggests the victim was non-combative, and did nothing whatsoever to precipitate the attack. All the paperwork was filed this morning, and you should have a copy of the new motion in that latest batch of folders.”
Judge Preston nodded as he turned to the defense table. “And you were made aware of these changes as well, Mr. Sawa?”
“Yes Your Honour, and we have no issue with the expanded charges. The defense is confident all allegations will be proven false.”
“Mr. Kaiba, you ARE aware that the mandatory sentence for anyone found guilty of second degree murder is complete memory erasure and re-implantation, yes? Manslaughter only carries a maximum penalty of partial erasure and rehabilitation. That’s a big difference, son.”
Seto crossed his arms defiantly over his chest. “I’m aware of the difference. With respect, the sentencing is irrelevant, as I am innocent of all charges.”
The judge seemed satisfied with this and requested that the proceedings continue, but Joey remained swept up in the horrific sensations that had assaulted him when the he’d heard the words ‘complete memory erasure and re-implantation’. Seto could get mem-wiped? The very thought of having one’s memories purged, essentially having everything that made you who you are, gouged out and replaced with a new, false identity terrified Joey beyond the capacity for rational thought. That was the harshest punishment doled out by the Colonies’ justice system, reserved for only the most serious of offenses. Joey couldn’t believe that the possibility hadn’t occurred to him before now.
A niggling voice spoke up from the recesses of his brain, insisting that if Seto WAS guilty, then it was certainly no less than he deserved. Joey suddenly felt very sick to his stomach. He knew, deep within his heart, that Seto was innocent, yet the voice refused to be quieted.
Are you so sure of him, even now? Do you think a year with you has changed him that much, remade him in YOUR image? Is he a better person for it? Wow, you certainly think highly of yourself, don’t you? You really don’t even know what he’s capable of...
On and on in endless circles, the voice taunted him, made him doubt Seto’s love, doubt his own self-worth, until at last, Joey had had enough.
Stop! I refuse to listen to any more of this! I know, without a doubt, that taking another’s life is something Seto is NOT capable of. He’s never had it in him to do such a thing, and everything will turn out OK, I know it. It just HAS to...
Snapping out of his reverie, Joey saw that Seto was being led to the witness stand, his head held high and his trademark disdain for everyone and everything around him writ prominently upon his face. A smallish, middle-aged man in a white lab coat trailed along behind him, carrying a small black bag. As Joey watched, rapt, Seto seated himself arrogantly in the witness box, regally reclining in the plush leather chair as if it were a throne, and one found lacking, at that. The other man followed him up onto the dais, opening his bag and pulling out various instruments, bottles and phials. Behind and to Seto’s right, more security officers were busy setting up a huge, flat vid screen, making it easily visible to the entire courtroom.
The man in the white coat turned out to be a doctor, Joey found out, as he observed the man perform a perfunctory examination on Seto, checking his heart rate, measuring his blood pressure and shining a small penlight into narrowed blue eyes. Seto complied willingly enough throughout the entire process, though his face wavered somewhere in between smug assurance and outright distrust. Joey flinched in sympathy when the small doctor inserted a needle in the back of Seto’s hand to start the IV, though the brunet himself didn’t even blink at the discomfort. From what he knew of the MDD via word of mouth and countless television crime dramas, Joey surmised that the drugs administered through the IV were to help the witness relax and to allow easier recall of memory. Seto looked ANYTHING but relaxed however, and by the time the doctor had attached all the trailing electrodes and placed the thin metal headpiece on Seto’s brow, he seemed more than ready to bolt. Not that anyone else would be able to tell of course, but Joey knew every nuance of expression, every nonchalant gesture, every taut muscle as well as he knew his own, and it was obvious to him that Seto Kaiba was scared shitless. Joey’s heart ached for his lover, and he wished with every fibre of his being that it was him up there on the witness stand in Seto’s place.
After the doctor had stepped away, Seto could no longer resist the urge to fidget, and with a wary expression on his face, his hand strayed upward to caress the metal band of the MDD on his forehead. Joey almost laughed aloud at the sight, his traitorous brain supplying him with the thought that Seto Kaiba had finally met a piece of technology he didn’t like. Joey shoved the slightly hysterical giggle back down, focusing again on the events rapidly progressing at the front of the courtroom.
Mr. Sawa strode confidently up to the witness stand, sparing a kindly smile for his client and employer. Seto’s face was once more composed into what Joey had always thought of as his ‘dueling mask’ and he now knew that this selfsame expression pulled double and triple duty as his ‘closing the deal’ and ‘addressing the boardroom’ mask, respectively.
“Mr, Kaiba, if you would, please recall for the court the events of this past Saturday, January 13th; specifically what occurred that evening, as you were leaving work.”
Seto glanced up at the huge vid screen hesitantly.
The judge peered over the banister at Seto, giving a reassuring nod. “Just start talking, son. The device will do the rest.”
Seto cleared his throat lightly and began speaking in a clear, concise voice. “I finished up my work day shortly after six PM and was looking forward to heading home.” His eyes met Joey’s across the crowded room, and the blond was overwhelmed by the longing he saw reflected in the blue depths.
I wanted that too, Seto, Joey thought desperately. I want that more than ANYTHING, now. God, I CAN'T lose him...
Seto pulled his gaze away from Joey and continued addressing the court. The screen behind him remained dark. “As I was on my way to the downstairs parking garage, I received a call on my private cell phone line. That would have been around six fifteen PM, and the caller was Mai Valentine.”
A soft ripple of murmurs spread throughout the spectators, and Judge Preston banged his gavel impatiently.
“She sounded panicked. It had been nearly a year since I’d spoken to her last, so I was surprised to hear from her, to say the least. She was borderline hysterical the whole time, and she repeatedly begged me to meet with her at her apartment. When I questioned her as to why it was so urgent, she insisted that she couldn’t talk about it over the phone; that I had to meet her in person.”
The screen behind him began to flicker and show images from the perspective of someone, obviously a very tall individual if all the men and women seen at shoulder height were any indication, striding purposefully through the crowded hallways at Kaiba Corp Headquarters. Joey was floored when he realized that they were actually SEEING through Seto’s eyes. Seto too, had noticed the vid screen come to life, and his words trailed off as the story unfolded for all to see.
Seto’s voice could be heard repeating an address back into the cell phone, and suddenly Mai’s voice reached Joey as if it were in his own ear.
“Please, PLEASE hurry. I know we’ve had our differences in the past, but you know I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”
Differences? Now THAT was the understatement of the year... Joey recalled how those two had spent the better part of three whole months fighting over him, before he’d even found out about it. When Tristan had finally let the cat out of the bag, Joey was even more chagrined to learn that he was, indeed, the LAST person to know. As it was, Joey’s relationship with Mai had fizzled after a handful of dates, and he’d refused to even entertain the notion of going out with Seto until he’d proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that he could at least be civil to Joey’s friends.
He was brought back to the present by the odd, echoing quality of Seto’s voice as he soothed the frantic Mai. It truly was as if he were hearing HIMSELF speaking into the cell phone.
“Just relax, Mai. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes. Whatever it is, I’m sure everything will be OK.”
Through the phone’s earpiece, Mai’s could be heard laughing unsteadily, and her voice was tinged with hysteria. “No. No it really won’t. Look, just hurry!”
There was an audible click as the connection was broken, and onscreen, Seto could be seen agilely flipping the cell phone closed with one hand. Elevator doors slid open to reveal Kaiba Corp’s underground parking garage.
Seto’s attorney stepped smoothly back in front of his audience. “Thank you, Mr. Kaiba. Could we please skip ahead to when you arrived at Ms. Valentine’s residence?”
The huge display screen flickered, and the scene changed to one of Seto standing outside a battered and closed apartment door. The lettering on the door read simply, ‘7E’ and Seto’s fist could be seen and heard rapping impatiently on its scarred, wooden surface. Another long-fingered, elegant hand entered the frame, pulling up Seto’s coat sleeve to prominently display the insanely expensive watch Seto wore on his left wrist. The time was nearly six thirty on the dot.
Turning his back on the monitor, Seto picked up the exposition again with practiced ease. “When I arrived at her apartment, she was still rather upset. Once inside, I escorted her over to the sofa and attempted to calm her and find out what the problem was. She was still a bit too emotional to make much sense, so I stepped into the kitchen to get her a glass of water. When I came back into the living room she was --”
Seto stopped speaking abruptly when a loud, collective murmuring began to spread throughout the gathered throng. Events onscreen had begun to diverge greatly from Seto’s narrative, and to Joey’s horror, had taken a sickeningly violent turn for the worse.
Mai’s apartment door was opened barely a crack, and half her tear-streaked face could be seen peering out from inside. As she closed the door to release the chain, one of Seto’s hands forced the door open the rest of the way, while the other shot out with remarkable speed and wrapped around Mai’s throat. Her violet eyes widened in terror as she was forced back inside the apartment, choking and gasping for breath. The sound of Seto kicking the door shut behind them echoed throughout the stunned courtroom and Joey watched, helpless, as Mai was shoved down onto her own sofa, frantically struggling to break the iron grip around her throat. Once Mai was in a prone position, Seto was able to use both hands and his superior body mass as leverage to strangle her in earnest. Her full lips paled, and then slowly morphed into a frightening shade of blue as her blood oxygen count decreased rapidly.
The packed courtroom was abuzz with talking and the occasional outburst as the assault played out, and Judge Preston was required to bang his gavel frequently to keep the noise level under control. Meanwhile, all the colour had drained from Seto’s face as he stared, transfixed in terror and revulsion as he was forced to watch himself commit an atrocity.
Mai’s hand had released its hold on Seto’s wrist, realizing it was useless to pit her strength against his. Instead, she scrabbled frantically at several items on the end table next to the sofa, her fingers finally closing on a heavy, decorative sphere made of leaded glass. She brought her arm up and around in a wild roundhouse punch that landed squarely on Seto’s cheekbone with a nauseating thud.
Growling in pain and anger, Seto released his hold on her throat and grated out, “You bitch! You’re going to pay for that!”
As this scene played itself out in excruciating detail, Seto incriminated himself further by lifting one shaking hand to his cheek and gently fingering the fading bruise there. All eyes were on his movements and reaction, and this gesture did NOT go unnoticed by the jury. Joey himself knew the true story behind that bruise, and it turned his stomach to think that his own clumsiness might help to damn his lover.
Late Friday night, or early Saturday morning depending on one’s perspective, Joey had awakened around four AM, groggy and disoriented, and had staggered his way to the en suite bathroom. He hadn‘t bothered turning on any lights as he went, and even though Joey had been living with Seto for close to six months, he was still not entirely accustomed to sharing both a bed and a bathroom with another person. They had surely experienced their own fair share of awkward moments as a result.
It hadn’t even occurred to Joey that Seto might already be up, preparing for an early day at the office, and having the bathroom door flung open to strike him full in the face had been quite the unpleasant wake-up surprise for the brunet. Seto had gone down hard in a tangle of long limbs and a bathrobe, and Joey had been utterly mortified at his cloddish mistake. Of course he had also been extremely apologetic, insisting on kissing every single one of Seto’s myriad of bumps and bruises before he allowed the injured CEO to leave the house. This, in turn, had escalated to further enjoyable antics, and had ultimately resulted in Seto’s actually being LATE into work that day. Despite being forgiven, as well as fucked into oblivion that morning, Joey couldn’t quite bring himself to look at Seto’s black eye without feeling a twinge of guilt. It was technically his fault that Seto had even been at the office that late on a Saturday. If he’d already arrived back home when he’d received Mai’s call, then Joey could have gone with him to the apartment, might have been able to do something to prevent...
Shaken out of useless recriminations, a rasping yell pulled Joey’s attention back to the action on the vid screen.
Mai made a mad dash for freedom, only to be pulled up short by Seto reaching out at the last second to savagely yank at a handful of trailing blonde hair. She screamed hoarsely as she fell onto her knees and began crawling toward a wooden desk situated in the corner, Seto following close behind. She jerked open the nearest desk drawer and began pawing through it urgently, her panicked sobbing the only sound audible in the small apartment. The perspective shifted somewhat and Mai fell out of the frame as Seto’s gaze lit upon a metal letter opener lying atop the desk. His right hand closed over it and then Mai was shown again, backing along the floor and waving a small, handheld stunner out in front of her. Swiftly, Seto dove down upon her and began stabbing her repeatedly in the chest and neck, droplets of blood flying everywhere and partially obscuring his vision. With a last, dying effort, Mai leveled the stunner and pulled the trigger. The hand clutching the letter opener suddenly halted its descent, Seto's fingers opening and closing convulsively as the weapon fell from his grasp to land upon Mai’s now unmoving chest. Then the screen went dark.
Chaos ruled the court room as a massive roar went up from the gathered spectators. The judge banged his gavel in agitation and called for order. Seto was up on his feet in the witness box, struggling to be heard over the din. “NO! That’s a lie! That’s not how it happened at all!”
Still striking his gavel against the podium in exasperation, the judge pointed his finger at Seto’s hapless lawyer. “Mr. Sawa, I’m going to have to ask you to restrain your client or I WILL have him forcibly removed from my courtroom!”
The poor attorney in question was pale and horribly shaken, but he somehow managed to stutter out a coherent reply, “Y-yes, Your Honour.” As Mr. Sawa placed a calming hand on his client’s shoulder, Seto pushed forcefully past him and addressed the bench with fury evident in his face and voice.
“I’m not going to stand here and be railroaded by this mockery of a trial!” He forcefully ripped the MDD off his head, electrodes and all, and flung it at the feet of the prosecutor. “This device is faulty, and I demand that it be examined at once!” Seto slammed his fists down on the banister between them, all semblance of his former control lost.
Judge Preston stared at him evenly. “Son, the mnemonic display only shows us what’s in YOUR memory. It can’t lie, even if YOU do.”
Enraged, Seto began tearing at the IV needle in his hand, breathing heavily and glaring wildly around the courtroom. The judge motioned to the waiting security officers, indicating Seto with a wave of his hand. The brunet wiped his bloodied hand on his suit jacket and whirled to confront the jury, blue fire blazing balefully from his eyes. “WHY??” he shouted at them. “Ask yourselves that! Why would I kill her?” The security guards had flanked him by then, and in the end, it had taken all four of them to wrestle Seto to the ground and re-fasten the cuffs around his wrists. They forcibly dragged him from the courtroom, with the CEO kicking and cursing the entire way. As they exited the same door through which they had first entered, Seto implored the jury one last time, “I had no reason to kill Mai! This doesn’t make sense! Can’t you people SEE that?” And then he was gone from sight.
Mr. Sawa sat at the defense table, looking like his life had just come crashing down around him, and Joey could easily relate. He had felt the same way when he’d stepped through the doors and into this courtroom, only now, he was filled with a fiery determination to prove Seto’s innocence. He’d never been more sure of anything in his life before, and after witnessing the lies that Seto had been accused of, he realized that his options were clear and unavoidable. Seto hadn't committed that crime, and Joey might very well be the only person who knew it for the truth.
In spite of his eagerness to go out and do something to correct this travesty of justice, he decided to wait out the results of the trial, hoping against hope that the jury would see reason. The worst case scenario involved nothing that Joey cared to dwell on, though the gears were already turning in his head, making plans to set things right. He knew that he would need to enlist the help of his friends, and as he plotted, he only halfway listened to the prosecutor make his closing argument.
As it stood, Joey hadn’t even been allowed in to see Seto yet, but he was willing to bet that a quick call to Yugi would be the best place to start trying to rectify that situation. Tristan would be willing to help, without a doubt. He had never been fond of Seto, even after he and Joey had started dating, but the other brunet was like a brother to him, and would never refuse a plea for help. Rebecca would be a must to have on board as well, in case they needed access to the police report or any government documentation. He sorely wished Duke was able to be called upon, for his own sake as well as Seto’s -- the former reporter had sources of information that boggled the mind and made even Rebecca’s extensive database pale in comparison.
While Joey pondered and problem solved, the jury had quietly filed back into their seats and announced that they were prepared to render their verdict. They’d barely been gone for twenty minutes, and Joey knew for certain that such hasty deliberations did not bode well for Seto. He watched, and listened, his heart in his throat and his pulse pounding painfully as the jury foreman stood and announced the unanimous verdict:
“Guilty as charged.”
The words echoed in Joey’s brain as the judge dismissed the jury, thanking them for their services. Less than an hour had passed from beginning to end of Seto’s trial, yet somehow, it was deemed adequate time for the man he loved to be declared a cold-blooded murderer. How could everyone just sit here and let this happen? Why wasn’t someone DOING something about it?
Frustrated, he pounded his closed fist against the back of the wooden bench in front of him, earning him a disapproving glare from the giant Belorian. Joey couldn’t have cared less, though. He had realized the main flaw in the Colonies’ use of the Mnemonic Display Device as the end-all, be-all, ‘humane’ alternative to traditional methods of interrogation. It was ridiculously easy to pinpoint, actually, and he could finally see what all the nay-sayers had been so vocal about in the past. Using the MDD eliminated one very vital component of the fair trial process: justification. Sure, it enabled the jury to witness the intimate details of a crime first hand, and pinpoint the perpetrator with deceptive ease, but what about motive? None of the people on that jury had even stopped to ask themselves why, so stricken were they by the gory details of the murder itself. They were probably too busy patting themselves on the back for doing the ‘right' thing instead of trying to step back and take a look at the big picture. And now, Seto would be the one to pay the price for that short-sightedness.
The judge had turned to address Seto’s devastated attorney. “Mr. Sawa, do you have any motions at this time?”
The lawyer lurched sluggishly to his feet. “Yes, Your Honour. I’d like to move that the verdict be set aside in the interest of -- “
“Motion denied. Is your client able to be returned to the courtroom for sentencing?”
Sawa’s face fell once more. “No, Your Honour. I’ve just received word that Mr. Kaiba is being held in isolation under heavy sedation. He won’t be joining us anytime soon.”
Nodding as if this were the answer he’d been expecting all along, Preston addressed the room at large, “Very well; I’ll make this brief. I’ve seen no reason to make an exception in this case, and despite all of Seto Kaiba’s past accomplishments and contributions to the Colonies, he has proven himself to no longer be a productive member of this society. I find his crime heinous enough to place him in a category judged beyond the help of rehabilitation and therefore I have no choice but to impose the harshest sentence allowable by law. I feel that it’s time to simply start over and render this individual harmless.”
Joey couldn’t help but notice that the judge was looking particularly smug during this speech, and it made him want to vomit. Faces around the courtroom mirrored the judge’s expression and various heads bobbed up and down in agreement. None of these people even KNEW Seto; how could they hate him so much?
“Mr. Kaiba is hereby sentenced to total memory erasure and re-implantation, sentence to be carried out five days hence, on Saturday, January the 20th, no later than eight AM Galderma Prime Mean Time. May God have mercy on his soul. This court is dismissed.”
With one final bang of the gavel, Joey’s world came to a complete stop. You can’t! he thought dumbly, That’s our one year anniversary!
All he knew immediately after that moment would only ever come back to him in the briefest fits and flashes. Being ushered out of the courtroom with the rest of the assembled throng, shoulder to shoulder with people chattering aimlessly about the excitement, the juicy scandal of it all. He hated them all, blindly. He wanted to lash out with his feet and his fists, to make them all pay for their smugness or force them to see reason; either one would suffice. But he resisted; he wasn‘t even sure what he wanted himself, anymore. He remembered his vision blurring with tears as he stumbled along en masse, when suddenly Yugi was there with him, tears streaking his own small face, telling Joey, “...sorry, I’m SO sorry...”
And then he was pushing past Yugi, shoving him away and running. Running and not thinking, not stopping, not remembering anything until he woke up at Tristan’s apartment the next morning. Joey spilled the entire story in a rush, sobbing into Tristan’s arms and barely pausing for breath. In the end, the two of them, together, began to formulate a plan. But what had struck Joey the most, what he remembered most clearly even today, was that Tristan had never hesitated in his unwavering loyalty to Joey; had thrown his lot in with his best and most trusted friend, no questions asked. Joey remembered feeling hot tears prick his eyelids once more as Tristan had stated simply, “We have five days left, Joey. Where do you want to start?”
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
“... Joey?”
“Mmm...?”
Seto smiled down at Joey in fond exasperation. “You were going to tell me what you and Tristan had found out?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah. Sorry, Seto. I was just lost in the past for a minute there.”
“Was it something good?” Seto leaned up to playfully tug on a lock of Joey’s hair. “Maybe even that time you had your wicked way with me in the flight simulator at Kaiba Land?” He grinned rakishly and waggled his eyebrows a bit.
Joey couldn’t help but laugh out loud. “Heh. No, it wasn’t. If I start thinkin’ about that, I won’t remember ANYTHING I wanted to tell you about.”
Seto smirked. That really HAD been one of his more innovative escapades with the blond. And who knew that Joey could be so aggressive? Apparently , sex in public places was a little known kink of his, and it brought out a side in his lover that Seto had never seen before. They’d definitely have to do that again sometime...
His smirk faltered and disappeared as the reality of the situation crashed down around him again. He fixed Joey with a piercing stare. “So tell me what you’ve found out. I know you and Tristan have been busy over the past week. Yugi’s told me that you were like a man possessed, trying to prove my innocence. I truly don’t mean to belittle your efforts, I’m just so glad to see you.” Seto leaned forward again and wrapped Joey in a tight embrace. “You’re all I’ve thought about this whole time, you know.”
“Seto, I...”
Seto cut him off before he could finish his sentiment. “Now; what have you two amateur sleuths uncovered?” He pulled his feet back under himself, sitting up against the pillows at the head of the bed and bringing the full force of his attention to bear on the blond.
Joey felt the scrutiny of that steady blue gaze like a tangible weight on the back of his neck. God, how he would hate to be an executive or adman whose very livelihood depended on making a successful presentation before this intense young man. Seto’s stare wasn’t malevolent in the least, but nevertheless Joey felt measured, assessed and found lacking. He nervously fumbled for the scraps of paper he’d shoved back into his pockets earlier, spilling several to the floor in his haste. His fingers trembled with urgency and anticipation. So much was riding on this, surely there was something that Seto could accomplish that Yugi couldn’t...?
“Relax, Joey. I’m not going to bite you or anything.” Seto considered his own statement for a moment. “Not until later, anyway.”
Joey smiled and tried to unwind a bit. He herded together his scattered thoughts and tried to think of the best place to begin. Might as well start with some of the most damning evidence of all...
“You didn’t kill Mai, but the blood on your hands WAS hers.”
Seto visibly flinched at this blunt statement, as Joey nodded to himself absently. “Yeah, we figured as much right from the beginning. Whoever did kill her must have put it there, and we have reason to believe that your so-called drug test was tampered with, too. There‘s no WAY it came back ‘inconclusive‘.”
“I repeatedly informed the police that I had lost consciousness at some point. The last thing I can recall clearly is Mai screaming as I came back from the kitchen. I remember feeling a sharp pricking sensation on the side of my neck, and when I woke up next, I was being read my rights.”
Joey latched onto this eagerly. “You WERE sedated somehow, I’m sure of it. Even the arrestin’ officers were willin’ to admit to me and Tris that you were way more disoriented than a simple shock from a stunner could account for. Funny that both of them were conveniently transferred to precincts outside of Domino Colony so suddenly, ain’t it? And it’s not just that, either. The anonymous call that they received WAS traced, despite what the DA claimed, but the records mysteriously disappeared just prior to your trial. That’s just too many coincidences at once. So the long and short of it is, we smelled a rat.”
Seto was suitably impressed. In less than one week, and with no formal training whatsoever, Joey had methodically set out to prove his lover’s innocence, and had managed to get further along in that endeavour than any of Seto’s own overpriced attorneys or the legions of detectives at Kaiba Corp’s disposal. From the beginning of their relationship, Seto had made it a point to help bolster Joey’s self confidence, telling him that he could accomplish anything that he set his mind to. He only wished that the ultimate test of Joey’s drive and determination hadn’t come under such trying circumstances. Attempting, most likely in vain, to absolve his boyfriend of a murder rap was really not the practical application Seto had had in mind...
Meanwhile, Joey seemed to be waiting expectantly for him to say something. Seto cleared his throat lightly and asked, “So, we know that Mai had to have been killed by someone else. Someone who obviously didn’t want me to find out the reason she asked to meet me that night. But who? And, more importantly, why?”
“Well, it’s obvious to me that YOU were framed because they’re afraid she might have told you something before they were able to get rid of her. The thing is, they couldn’t be certain of it, or you’d be dead too. It was important that you be discredited, more than anything else.”
Seto blanched. Joey had a point, and not one he really cared to dwell on for very long, either.
“That’s where me and Tris started with our line of reasonin’.” Joey glanced down at one of the ragged pieces of paper in his hand as he recited, “Point number one: What did Mai know and who else might have known it too?” He looked up at Seto with an open, serious expression. “What was so important to hide that nearly TWO people have already been killed over it?”
“Two?” Understanding dawned on Seto abruptly. “You said that what happened to Duke was no accident?”
Joey nodded affirmatively. “You WERE payin’ attention,” he joked. “Duke had been workin’ as a freelance journalist since he graduated college. I mean, we all knew that, but what we didn’t know, was that he’d been undercover for almost an entire year, diggin’ up some huge kind of story or scandal. And that’s not all. Apparently, he and Mai had been seein’ each other the whole time, and they hadn’t told anyone about it, neither.”
“And you think this ‘big story’ has something to do with why Mai was killed?”
“I know so. Duke’s car wreck was no freak accident.” Joey paused for full sensational effect, his voice dropping to barely a whisper. “He was SILENCED.” He paused for emphasis, allowing his words to sink in.
Seto rolled his eyes and barked out a short laugh. “A little overly dramatic, don’t you think?”
Joey’s reaction wasn’t so much affronted as it was morally outraged. “God dammit, Seto! How can I possibly be OVERLY dramatic about something like this! Duke is twenty-one years old, and he'll be spendin’ the rest of his life in an institution, not able to feed himself or even remember his own name!”
Seto felt slightly ashamed at his comment, but he instinctively lashed out in anger. “And I’m ALSO twenty-one years old, about to lose everything that I’ve built over a lifetime! You, and all that we’ve shared. My brother, my company. Each and every life experience I have stored away, every single thing that makes me ME will be wiped out! It will all be GONE, and the person known as Seto Kaiba will cease to exist! I think I deserve to be a little bitter about it!”
Joey said nothing at first, he merely looked down at his feet as Seto stood there, panting heavily and allowing his temper to spiral back down to a more rational level. He felt compelled to apologize for his outburst, but stubbornly refused to do so. Sometimes, he wondered if that stubbornness was all he had left.
Still staring pensively at the ground, Joey’s soft voice carried clearly to Seto‘s ears. “You have EVERY right to be bitter, Seto. I only wanted you to know that I haven’t given up all hope yet. Maybe you’ll realize that by the time I’m done.”
Seto was once again mildly ashamed of himself, but refused to accede the point. He merely inclined his head in Joey’s direction and mumbled, “Go on.”
The blond lifted his head after a moment, picking up his narrative where he had left off. “We know that Duke’s story started out as a bio piece on Marcel Binoche, the inventor of the MDD itself. If you remember your history correctly, and I know you of all people do, we’re comin’ up on the fiftieth anniversary of the mnemonic display technology bein’ used in law enforcement.” Joey grinned sheepishly. “I actually had to go and look that up.”
Seto nodded absently. Where was Joey going with this?
“To make a long story short, and don’t you dare say ‘too late’ ya big smartass, Tris and I believe that Duke uncovered evidence that the device is faulty and he was goin’ to go public with it. They HAD to shut him up then. And if he told Mai about it...” Joey hopped up from his seat on the bed, pacing the length of the room and waving his hands animatedly as he became more and more excited over his subject. “Imagine it, Seto! The cornerstone of our modern justice system, proven to be ineffective! The exact same means they used to convict you, not only faulty but able to be manipulated to suit anyone’s purposes. I’m positive that’s what happened in your case; there’s no other explanation! Now all we have to do is --”
“Joey, slow down. You’re putting the cart before the horse, don’t you think?” Seto ran his hands through his hair in exasperation, biting back an angry snarl as he saw Joey’s face fall once again. “Look. Do you have evidence to back any of this up?”
“Yeah, of course, “ Joey sulked. “Tris and Duke used to have a thing goin’ on back in high school, and lucky for us, he hadn’t changed very many of the passwords on his home computer. I’m guessin’ the bad guys didn’t have the same luck, or else they just got the hard copies and left the rest. Anyways, it’s all a bunch of techno mumbo jumbo that Tris claims to understand. I’m not really sure if I believe him or not, but we’ve got Rebecca standin’ by, and she’s willing to back us up on it. She’s the only person I know who’s better with tech stuff than you are, and if SHE tells them that the --”
Seto held up one hand. “Hold on! What do you mean ‘better’ than me?”
Joey paused in mid step and turned to give Seto an incredulous stare. “Seto, this is NOT the time for me to be pamperin’ your massive ego, OK? Now, what was I sayin’? Oh yeah. The techno crap isn’t my department, you know. I’m more of the ‘legwork’ guy, and those two are the brains of the operation.” He grinned mischievously, giving Seto a sly wink. “Believe it or not.”
Shuffling through his notes once more, Joey’s eyes lit up. If possible, he became even more excited, as he scurried over to kneel at the bedside, grasping Seto’s hand in both of his. “And here’s the part that’s gonna get you out of here, wait and see. From what we can tell about Duke’s investigation, it looks like several members of the Ruling Council already knew about the problems with the MDD and they’ve been quietly covering it up for YEARS. Who knows? Maybe even one of them was behind what happened to Duke and Mai.”
Seto gaped at Joey in mute horror as the full implications behind this theory dawned on him. Snatching his hand back out of the blond’s clutches, he grabbed a fistful of Joey’s t-shirt and dragged him across the bed. Nose to nose, Seto stared straight into wide amber eyes and spat, “Joey, you could have been in danger! You probably still are! What the fuck were you thinking?!”
“I was thinkin’ about YOU, Seto. What else?”
“Well DON‘T! Thinking isn’t exactly what you do best!”
Joey turned his face away from Seto and clenched his fists in anger, biting his lip fiercely to withhold the spiteful retort that threatened to spew forth. Seto read everything he needed to know from the blond’s wounded expression, and his own face immediately flushed with remorse. His damnable temper still got the better of him on occasion, and the problem was frequently compounded by the fact that more and more often, Joey seemed to be the level-headed one of the pair these days. He was showing remarkable restraint even now, and with a resigned sigh, Seto released his hold on the other boy’s shirt. “I’m sorry, Joey. I was just worried about you. Something terrible could have happened -- could STILL happen -- if the wrong person finds out what you know. Have you told Yugi about any of this?”
Huffily setting his clothing to rights once more, Joey refused to look Seto in the face. “No. Tris figured we better play our cards close to our chests for now. Besides, Yug’ has to deal with those bastards on the Council every single day, and we didn’t want to endanger him, what with the baby on the way and all...” Joey stood and walked away again, scuffing his feet aimlessly as he went. “But now that we have proof, I can go straight to the DA and get her to --”
“You’ll do no such thing!” Seto leapt up from the bed, grabbing Joey by the upper arms and spinning him around forcefully.
“Huh? But -- but WHY?!”
Seto tightened his grip on the blond until Joey grimaced in pain. He knew he was hurting his lover, but he had to make sure Joey understood that going public with his discoveries was NOT an option. “You’re just not seeing the big picture here!” Seto punctuated his words by giving Joey a firm shake. “Think of the upheaval a revelation like that would bring, Joey. The MDD is the universally accepted means of conviction throughout all the colonies. Combined with using mem-wipe as a punishment for the most severe offenses, it’s been THE single most effective crime deterrent in human history. Felonies and misdemeanours both are at a record low, the death penalty is obsolete, and everyone is happy with the status quo. Thanks to these developments, traditional incarceration is practically unheard of; hell, prisons don’t even EXIST any more, and rehabilitation is as simple as the push of a few buttons. Coupled with the fact that all forms of memory erasure are permanent and irreversible, you’ve got a near perfect system of justice that only an idiot would want to mess with.” He smiled slightly to take the sting out of his words. “No offense.”
Joey shook his head throughout the entirety of Seto’s lengthy speech, denying the truth he didn’t want to see. “You don’t know that for sure! People would want to know that the system’s corrupt. They deserve to be -- ”
“Dammit Wheeler! Open your eyes!” he lashed out reflexively. “If it came to light that the Colonies’ one and only method of determining guilt or innocence, used exclusively for almost fifty years now, was NOT, in fact, totally infallible, can you even BEGIN to imagine the chaos that would be unleashed? Hundreds of thousands of people have been mem-wiped since the technology was first introduced. Every single one of them was someone’s lover, friend, or family member. Do you think the rest of the public is going to accept that it was all some huge, horrible mistake and just move on with their lives? There’s no kind of all-purpose apology that covers a monumental fuck up like this, Joey. Protests, rioting, governmental meltdown, and martial law would just be the beginning. Countless people in every corner of the Colonies, from every walk of life could be hurt and/or killed over this. Are you prepared to risk all that for my freedom?”
“YES!!” Joey cried, tears streaming anew down his cheeks.
Seto released Joey’s arms, reaching up to tenderly cup the blond’s face in his hands. He pressed his forehead against Joey’s and murmured, “If you don’t care about what happens to other people, which I find difficult to believe, then at least be realistic about this. The most likely scenario is that those in power will ignore the evidence, and then covertly do away with you and anyone else who knows what you’ve found out.” Seto brought his mouth down to brush against Joey’s own, his tongue sliding out briefly to moisten the other’s lips. Breathlessly, he tried reasoning with his lover one final time. “I’m sorry to be painting you a picture that you refuse to acknowledge, but this is one gamble you don’t want to take, Joey. Trust me on this, please. They’re not going to just let me walk out of here with a ‘Sorry for the misunderstanding, Mr. Kaiba. Please feel free to return to your everyday average life. No harm, no foul.’ Even YOU have to realize that.”
Choking with the strain of holding his sobs in check, Joey adamantly pushed the issue. He wouldn’t, COULDN’T face giving up on Seto, not with all that was at stake. “That’s not the way it would happen, Seto. You’re just too stubborn to admit it. You’d be a figurehead, a way to show everyone how the Council wants to win back the public’s trust. You’re well known and respected; that’s why Mai came to you in the first place, I bet. If they showed everyone that they were makin’ an effort to fix what’s broken, and held you up as an example...” Joey trailed off, realizing he was grasping at straws now.
Seto pulled away, turning his back on the blond. “My God, would you just LISTEN to yourself? This isn’t some seventeenth century class struggle, and despite the irony of the situation, it’s not ‘Crime and Punishment’, either! Supposing we DO somehow manage to get my conviction overturned; then what? Even you aren’t naive enough to think we’ll just ride off into the sunset together. It’s time to face the facts. This IS going to happen, and there’s nothing that either of us, or anyone else for that matter, can do about it. Whether I’m a martyr for the cause today, or fifteen years from now, the end result is the same.” Seto whirled to face his lover, his own wide blue eyes pleading mutely, brimming with unshed tears. “This is IT, Joey. This is the end of everything, and I am so fucking scared right now. Will you please just drop your pointless crusade and hold me, one last time?”
All of Seto’s iron control broke free at that moment, and as Joey rushed into his arms, throwing him forcefully against the far wall, he sobbed bitterly, hating himself for being weak, hating life for being so God-damned unfair.
“Christ, Seto, “ Joey grated out against the brunet’s neck. “This is really takin’ one for the team on a cosmic scale, you know?” He leaned away in order to meet Seto’s eyes as he forced a shaky smile. “Why can’t you just be selfish for once, huh?”
Smiling through his tears, Seto said thickly, “I’m always selfish, Joey. I’ve never done anything noble in my entire, worthless life. Let me have my moment, will you?”
“Shut up.” Joey crushed his lips to Seto’s, claiming his mouth in a fierce, searching kiss. The brunet found himself humming breathless encouragement as Joey’s tongue curled frantically around his own. Overwhelmed with lust and longing, the only thought that surfaced in his beleaguered mind was, “God, how much I’ve MISSED this...”
Strong, calloused hands cupped his face briefly before gliding down to his shoulders, his chest, his nipples, demanding responses that Seto couldn’t have held back, even if he’d wanted to. His own hands found Joey’s nape, fingers tightening in silken locks as his lover’s thumbs circled and teased and moved on. He found himself reaching for Joey’s button fly with hands that suddenly wouldn’t cooperate, and he cursed his own nervousness. Shaking off his uncharacteristic hesitancy, Seto grabbed the waistband of Joey’s jeans and roughly pulled the blond’s groin against his own, taking back control of the situation. Pulling away briefly from their passionate kiss, he tilted his head to one side and bit down sharply on the side of Joey’s neck. Hearing his lover’s submissive whimper, he smiled knowingly against the heated flesh. “Beg me,” Seto growled, low in his throat. “Beg me to take you.”
“Please,” Joey gasped out, tossing his head and arching his back, desperately pleading for more contact. “Please fuck me.”
Seto smiled his predator’s grin once more. “No. We’ll do this slowly.”
Joey groaned in protest and drove his pelvis against Seto’s own, needing to establish more pressure, more sensation through the bothersome barrier of their clothing. Seto relented long enough to allow Joey to undress them both, having learned long ago that the simple act brought his lover a modicum of enjoyment all on its own. Once they were both naked and panting yet again, Seto reclaimed the upper hand, forcing Joey back onto the small bed and rapidly bringing him off once, then twice, with his talented mouth and hands, until by the time Seto gently turned him over onto his stomach, the blond was pleasantly boneless and half asleep with sated bliss.
“Joey.”
“...Mmm?”
“I’m afraid I don’t have anything to use for lubrication. It wasn’t really a request I felt comfortable making on my own behalf, you understand,” the brunet said sardonically. “The uh, hand soap in the bathroom has been working just fine for me thus far.”
Joey gave a soft laugh at that. “You mean you’ve been...” He left the rest unsaid, his voice teasingly scandalized.
“Of course,” Seto agreed amiably as he kissed his way up Joey’s smoothly muscled back. “I DID say that I’ve been thinking of nothing but YOU this entire time, didn‘t I...?”
“S’OK, Seto. I know you’ll make it good. You always do.”
Seto set about doing just that, as he trailed his tongue up along the base of Joey’s spine, eliciting a deep moan and a full body shudder for his efforts. The blond spread his legs wider and crawled forward on his belly, shamelessly displaying his most private recesses, trusting his lover to bring him only pleasure and comfort. Seto slid his hands between the firm cheeks, spreading them apart and baring the hidden crevice to his eager view. Seto kissed and licked all the tantalizing areas he had unrestricted access to, without pushing any further, though he made a point to keep returning to the center. Using his thumbs to rub firmly against the skin behind Joey’s balls, he entered the blond with his tongue, lightly thrusting in and out, teasing mercilessly around the puckered opening. He delighted in the sheer abandonment and feral quality of the noises the smaller boy was making under his expert ministrations, probing deep and feeling for the tense muscles to gradually loosen. When he judged that Joey was finally relaxed enough for the next step, Seto deftly inserted two slim digits into the clenching passageway, listening avidly for any signs of distress. As he ruthlessly manipulated the small gland within, Joey cried out loudly, bucking wildly against Seto’s hand. At last, the brunet could no longer deny himself the much anticipated pleasure to be found in Joey‘s ready and wanton body.
Removing his fingers, Seto guided the other boy up onto his hands and knees, and positioning his straining arousal at his lover’s entrance, the brunet carefully pushed inside, groaning aloud as the head of his cock slipped past the tight ring of muscle. Joey sucked in a sharp breath of air, instinctively lurching forward, away from the painful penetration. Seto stroked the blond’s shoulders soothingly as he pressed slowly onward, feeling the tight heat surround his aching member, desperately denying the savage part of him that wanted to break free and ravish this beautiful creature spread so wantonly before him. After an interminable amount of time to his delirious, ecstasy-clouded mind, Seto was fully sheathed inside his golden lover, and he fought to regain control over his runaway senses. Leaning forward over the other boy’s violently trembling back, Seto ran his strong hands through the soft, sweaty blond tresses at the base of Joey’s neck, murmuring nonsense words to help ease the discomfort of the burning intrusion.
Seto closed his eyes tightly, fighting unsuccessfully to bring his traitorous body back in line with his brain. Giving in after only the briefest of struggles, he grated out through clenched teeth, “Oh God, Joey. I know I need to take this slow, but I just CAN’T. I’m sorry...” With that, he pulled back and then immediately thrust forward again, drawing a strangled moan from deep within the blond’s throat.
“It’s alright Seto,” Joey gasped out, his breath hitching again in pained pleasure as the brunet flexed his hips and drove ahead once more, hitting that spot deep inside. “Don’t be sorry. This is-- hnn... exactly how I’ve always seen you. This is how you love me...”
Seto fell against his lover’s back, biting, mouthing wetly at the side of Joey’s neck as he rasped, “How’s that again? How do you see me?”
“Tender and beautiful, but with an-- ahh! With an edge...”
Joey’s husky words, combined with the heat and nearly unbearable tightness of that lithe body surrounding his eager cock, snapped the last thread of Seto’s self restraint and he started to move in earnest now, striving for the perfect climax that lay just out of his reach, beckoning him onward. His body established a rapid, rolling rhythm completely of its own volition, and Joey responded willingly, pushing back against Seto’s harsh thrusts with a natural grace born of practice and perfect symmetry. As Seto threw his head back and growled out his passion to the heavens, Joey fell forward onto his elbows, his cries escalating in pitch and volume as he too, skirted the edge of completion. “Ah God, Seto-- harder! Fuck me HARDER! Ungh... Make it hurt! Make it-- ahh! Please! I don’t want to ever forget this!”
The words hit Seto like a sledgehammer to the gut, and he felt his throat tighten restrictively. Joey couldn’t know what he was saying, how much it struck directly at Seto’s very soul and made him want to shake his fists and curse the cruelty of fate with his last, defiant breath. Not so very long ago, when he and Joey had made love for the first time, it had been a new experience for the both of them, neither having ever been with a another man before, and despite the fumbling and awkwardness of the whole affair, it had been sheer perfection as well, right down to the moment when Joey had shouted out his love for Seto as he climaxed. The blond had been remorseful and embarrassed immediately afterward, but Seto had merely soothed away his fears, returning the sentiment and quietly advising his new lover to never regret the utterances of passion. They were the only truths ever spoken directly from the heart, he’d told him, and Seto certainly couldn’t fault Joey for revealing his heart now, no matter how painful it was for him to hear. Not when he himself wished so desperately for the very same thing.
As Joey continued to whimper and beg for release, Seto sped up his thrusts to the point of mindlessness, snaking one hand around the blond’s hip and wrapping his long fingers around his lover’s engorged cock, stroking it firmly in time with the rhythm he had established. Joey came almost instantly, crying out raggedly as his legs collapsed underneath him, his hands curving into sharp talons as he dug his fingers forcefully into the mattress below. The moment Joey’s support gave way, Seto’s arm shifted beneath the smaller boy’s now limp figure, grasping him firmly around the waist and holding the blond’s exhausted body tight against his own. He grunted with the effort as he pumped several more finishing strokes into the still convulsing channel, all pretense at gentleness long since abandoned. Hoarsely screaming Joey’s name, Seto finally allowed his own orgasm to overtake him, his body wracked with almost painfully intense shudders as he spilled his essence deep within the confines of his lover's limp form.
Collapsing overtop of the smaller figure, Seto fell into a brief stupor, moving in and out of awareness until he felt Joey begin to stir slightly underneath him. The restless movements brought him rapidly back to full hardness, and still buried snugly in the embrace of his lover’s clinging passage, Seto began to rock slowly, softly against the sleeping figure beneath him, bringing the blond to gentle wakefulness. Joey keened quietly into the bed pillows as the brunet made love to him with infinite care, as if to atone for his earlier ferocity. When they reached their sated conclusion as one entity, Seto at last drifted into full, blissful slumber, descending swiftly into darkness as he murmured breathy ‘I love you’s’ against the nape of Joey’s neck.
When he awoke again, Joey was lying on his side next to Seto, gazing down at him intently in the near total darkness. “I love you,” the blond said simply, and he kissed the taller boy with such tenderness and longing, Seto thought for a moment that perhaps his heart had stopped beating in his chest. Methodically, Joey worshipped Seto’s body as if it were the holiest of relics, taking his lover skillfully to the edge and then back again repeatedly, until the brunet was delirious with pleasure and longing for release once more. Joey’s hands were everywhere at once, caressing his face and shoulders, chest and sides, and he stared down at his lover, awestruck and somewhat bemused as he slipped easily inside Seto’s waiting heat. Thrusting smoothly, Joey never once closed his wide, amber eyes in bliss, nor looked away from the beloved visage below him. When the blond reached his peak for the final time that night, Seto watched in fascination as his lover transcended every possible definition of the word exquisite, his face transformed with amazement, luminosity and simple, aching gratitude. Seto followed quickly after him, too exhausted to cry out, carrying the memory of Joey’s beatific expression with him as he spiraled down into oblivion. The last thing he heard before sleep claimed him permanently was a whispered, “Happy anniversary, Seto.”
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
When Joey awoke groggily the next morning, he knew immediately that something was wrong. He shifted around restlessly on the bed, detecting various aches and pains that brought a smile to his lips. Still somehow discomfited, he finally surmised that it must be the chilly temperature of the surrounding atmosphere that had woken him so out of sorts. He rolled over to pull Seto more firmly against himself for warmth, but when his arm met nothing more than empty air and rapidly cooling sheets, he snapped to full awareness, panic overwhelming him instantly. He bolted upright, gathering the sheet and blanket around his nude body, gaping in disbelief at the cell door standing wide open and unattended. “Oh God, Seto --” His eyes flew around the room wildly, alighting on the featureless walls, the bathroom door panel standing open, concealing nothing inside, his own neatly stacked clothes in a pile at the foot of the bed, a folded letter resting on top. “No,” he choked. “It can’t be...”
This isn’t happening! It’s not, it’s not, it’s not... On and on his brain circled futilely, until he swallowed hard and forced one shaking hand out to grasp the tri-folded papers that had drawn his attention. Numbly, he opened the letter and began to read:
Joey,
I know you’re not going to be very pleased with me when you read this. Believe me, if I’d thought of a better way, I would have leapt at it in a heartbeat. Please don’t hate me for being a shameless coward and saying good-bye in this manner. I only wanted our final moments together to be painless, or at the very least comforting, as opposed to tragic. I want you to remember last night, always, and carry those special memories with you in place of tearful farewells. You can understand that now, can’t you?
Regardless, it’s past the time for useless recriminations, and that’s not really the point of this letter. Enclosed you’ll find a missive that I had formerly been working on for some time, trying to come up with an adequate way to sum up my feelings for you on the occasion of this, our very first anniversary together. Things didn’t quite go as planned, needless to say, but I still wanted you to see that you were forever in my thoughts. And though I don’t mean to torture you with pointless ‘might have been’s’, I couldn’t walk toward my fate with my head held high if I believed that you’d never truly known what our love has meant to me.
This isn’t getting any easier, and as I sit here watching you sleep peacefully, I want nothing more in the world than to curl up against you and ignore the cruel destiny that awaits me. It wouldn’t do to have the guards burst in upon us, dragging me kicking and screaming from your embrace; therefore I find this a kinder, gentler parting by far. You may not agree, but I desperately hope that you can someday absolve me of my aversion and arrogance.
I’d like to be noble and counsel you to just go on without me, to be strong and move forward with your life, but as I said before, I’m too selfish by far. My nature has never been self-sacrificing, and it would be a discredit to you for me to believe that you wouldn’t immediately see through my ruse. Carry me in your heart for all eternity, Joey, is what I want to urge you instead. As long as the memory of Seto Kaiba resides within you, then I truly DO still exist. Even if you can never bring yourself to forgive me for abandoning you, I hope you’ll think on me kindly, and with love, whenever your thoughts stray to the brief, but happy, moment in time that we once shared. In that small, special way, I will always be with you.
Love,
Seto
Joey stared at the page in his hand, reading and re-reading until the words were etched into his mind; not daring to break them down and analyze them too closely, yet still wanting so very badly to simply rush out of the room and put an end to his own miserable existence. You’re such a sly one, Seto, he thought admirably. You knew exactly what buttons to push to prevent just that, didn’t you?
Setting the first page aside, Joey moved on to the remainder of the letter, this part inscribed on elegant Kaiba Corp stationery. Joey suppressed a small smile as the image of Seto, seated behind his huge office desk, hunched over and scribbling furiously, came unbidden to his mind. His stomach clenched painfully with longing, but he diligently pressed on and began to read once more:
Joey,
I find myself sitting here in my office with mountains of work to do, yet unable to hold a single thought in my head except for the desire to rush home and kiss you senseless. And yes, that IS about as poetic as the great Seto Kaiba will ever wax, so I hope it’s enough to tide you over for the rest of our lives together.
I can picture you now, looking faintly surprised as you read this, hopefully with me looking over your shoulder while you do so, able to gauge your reactions and reap the benefits of a few kind words in the process. A kiss or two perhaps? Maybe something more adventurous? Maybe later, then. Does that indeed shock you? That I want to spend the rest of my life with you? You shouldn’t be all that taken aback; I’ve certainly made no secret of the fact that being with you has made me happier than I’ve ever been in my entire life. I never even knew that I possessed the capacity for love, Joey, much less to the depth and degree that I feel for you. I have YOU to thank for that, you know. Why wouldn’t I want to hold onto that for as I long as I live?
Next week is our one year anniversary and I can’t help but want to do something extravagant, something outrageous even, to mark the occasion. Hopping a red-eye transport to the Paras Nebula and having a romantic dinner at the top of the observation station seems too cliché
somehow, don’t you think? Trust me when I say we’ll do all that and more someday, but for now, I’m finding it a chore just to write my own thoughts and feelings down on paper. You do realize that if this letter ever finds its way into the wrong hands, I’ll have no choice but to disavow its existence, right? But never you, Joey. Never US.
Again, putting these thoughts into words isn’t going as smoothly as I’d first hoped when I started writing this, but there are a number of important things I wanted to tell you, and I’ll gladly say them to you again in person, when we celebrate our year of happiness together and toast the countless years to come. But, for now, I’ll settle for giving you some heartfelt advice, direct from the heart of one who owes you so much, the one whose life has been irrevocably changed for the better, in the hopes that I can do the same for you.
The one positive thing that Gozaburo ever did for me was to impart his own admiration of the Greek philosophers, and in particular, the writings of Socrates himself. My favourite quote by far reads as follows:
‘The unexamined life is not worth living.’
Straightforward and to the point; or so I’d always thought. I took Socrates’ words to mean simply that knowing oneself, on an intellectual level, to analyze and break apart all that is logical and reasonable, and apply it to one’s own life, was the key to happiness itself. I did just that, tirelessly, religiously, and for years on end, until there was nothing left in my own psyche that could ever surprise me, and I thought that I was happy because of it.
And then YOU came along.
We’re opposites, you and I, in too many ways to count, but that’s only on the surface, Joey. Your strength of character and inner drive are more than a match for my genius and cool logic in every way. I can see that look on your face again, and I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty that you NEVER expected to hear those particular words from me, did you? THE Seto Kaiba, admitting that he has an equal? Yes. Undoubtedly and without hesitation I hold you up as a shining example of all that is possible through compassion, bravery and the triumph of the human spirit. Now all I have to do is convince YOU that it’s true.
Your lack of self esteem and doubt in your own abilities is a source of endless frustration to me, Joseph Wheeler. Like myself, your life hasn’t been easy. The way you’ve struggled through it all and managed to come out the other side unbroken, never allowing your misfortunes to harden your heart against others, has frankly never ceased to amaze me. But I don’t want your upward climb to greatness to stop there, when I know in my own heart and soul that you’re capable of SO much more. If you’d only learn to tap that inner desire, to find the willingness to take that initial step forward and examine your own life, and all that it still has to offer you, I know that you, too, would see the truth in my words.
I’d like to make that my first gift to you, if you’ll let me, on the esteemed occasion of our one year anniversary -- the gift of a hand to hold and guide you on your way as you set out on the journey to seek the happiness you so richly deserve, and the reassurance that comes with knowing that no matter how far you roam or what difficulties you may encounter on that journey, you’ll always have someone to return home to at the end of it.
Promise me that you’ll do me the honour of accepting my humble gift, such as it is.
With Love Always,
Seto
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
Back in the present for the time being, Joey idly stroked the now tattered sheets of paper that he carried with him at all times, reflecting on how he’d taken Seto’s advice to heart, enrolling in college and then law school, eventually finding the way and the means of going public with his discoveries about the MDD. He’d almost single-handedly brought down the corrupt system with a minimum of upheaval, and earned himself, Tristan and Rebecca a place in history, as well as reputations for being staunch crusaders against injustice.
Joey had been extremely vocal in his denunciation of the mnemonic technology, and the practice of memory erasure in particular, holding up his three contemporaries, Duke Devlin, Mai Valentine, and the famous-in-his-own-right Seto Kaiba, as examples of a well-meaning corrections system gone horribly wrong. They had become modern day martyrs, not that any of the unfortunate trinity were capable of caring about such things, but every soul in the Colonies now knew their names and their involvement to Joey and his tireless efforts -- few knew of the real relationships behind the headlines, however, or the true story of all that had been lost in the process from realization to actualization.
Joey had even gone so far as to use the connections that came with his fame and influence to covertly launch a search for Seto and his new identity, never quite letting go of the hope that he might one day be found. The blonde harboured a secret and desperate hope that upon being rediscovered, one look at his lost love would magically restore all that had been stolen from Seto, and their life together would begin anew. This dark fantasy was, of course, hideously unfair to Tristan, though Joey still couldn’t bring himself to be thankful that the search had never borne any fruit. It remained nothing more than a shameful daydream to be taken out and examined only on rare occasions, and with much guilt and recrimination involved.
That would change if he ever decided to publish that book, Joey mused as he exited yet another run-of-the-mill press conference. That damned book that haunted him nearly as arduously as the memories themselves. Did the world deserve to hear about that aspect of the now-famous tale? It wasn’t quite ancient history just yet, but fifteen years in the past was a good deal of distance to put between himself and the pain. At least it was at any other time of the year than right now.
Did he even WANT the fickle public poring over his private heartache, even in this brave, new world he had helped to forge? There was a very real possibility that the masses and the media would freely discuss it, take it apart from every conceivable angle, and God forbid, judge him for his actions, past AND present. Did he truly want to subject himself to that again, on a personal level? More importantly, would Seto want him to?
Tristan pulled him out of his grim reflection by wrapping a comforting arm around his waist and gently guiding him toward their waiting limo. Joey sighed again, his thoughts finding yet another avenue to take that brought him no closer to a decision. Tris would be affected just as deeply as Joey himself if the details were to emerge, and even though he’d never been anything but honest with his husband regarding his history with Seto, the attention would still drag hurtful truths and reminders up from the buried past. Reminders that the sensitive brunet would always be a mere shadow to the memory of the man who was Joey Wheeler’s first, and greatest, love.
But Joey knew without a doubt that Tristan would support him no matter what his final decision on the matter may eventually be, and it had always been that way, for as long as they’d been together, as friends and more. What Tristan had felt for Joey since their childhood together had grown, and as their bond had deepened in the days and months that followed Seto’s departure, he’d revealed those feelings to Joey, asking for nothing in return other than to be heard and acknowledged for them. Years passed, and as they fought together to see past wrongs righted and future tragedies avoided, Tristan had steadily worn Joey down. The blond was tired of being alone, and often were the nights that the two young men slowly learned to take comfort in each other, carnal or otherwise. Eventually, it was enough to forge a newer, stronger bond, though it often paled greatly in comparison to the all-consuming fire and passion that was Seto Kaiba’s legacy. There was nothing to be done for the way he felt, not that Joey would ever have wanted to alter the status quo, were it possible. He could never betray Seto's memory by giving away his entire heart, no matter how much it hurt Tristan in the process.
Riding in the limousine on the way to their hotel, Joey glanced at his watch and saw that some time between the docking of the transport ship and the end of the press conference, January 20th had arrived. Joey leaned his head over onto Tristan’s shoulder and accepted a chaste kiss to the forehead. He’d done what Seto had asked of him, hadn’t he? But if so, why wasn’t he happy?
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
Gazing blankly down at the letter still clutched tightly in his hand, Joey didn’t realize that his vision had started to blur until the first wet droplets began to strike the page, blotting the small, precise lettering wherever they happened to fall. Shaking himself out of the trancelike state that had overcome him, Joey dressed swiftly and scrambled out the cell door at breakneck speed. He ran through the maze of twisting hallways and out of the holding facility itself, not a single soul attempting to bar his way or question his frantic, headlong rush. He hurriedly glanced up at the digital readout at the top of the clock tower across the street, and saw that it was more than half past eight in the morning. He increased his pace, hoping against hope that he wasn’t too late. He was unsure of exactly what he would do when he arrived at the Hall of Justice; vague notions of simply wrestling Seto away from the security officers and making a run for it flitted through his confused head as he ran, and he nearly laughed out loud at the absurdity.
As he rounded the corner to his destination, Joey skidded to a halt in front of the massive stone edifice. Standing out front at the top of the steps, looking tiny and forlorn, was the figure of his friend, Yugi. The smaller boy stood tense and expectant, just as if he had merely been waiting for Joey to happen along.
“Don’t say it, Yug’! I’m not too late! I won’t hear it!”
Yugi stepped forward, his arms outstretched, and Joey brought his fist up to his mouth, biting his knuckle sharply and trying in vain to hold back his hysterical laugh. His eyes darted around wildly like a caged animal‘s, as he slowly backed away from the smaller boy. Yugi stopped advancing on him and called out pleadingly, “Joey, wait!”
Joey snapped out of his stupor somewhat, his wide eyes fixing intently on his friend, as if spotting him for the first time. “You were there, weren’t you, Yug’? They did it, didn’t they?”
“Joey, I --”
The blond seized his best friend by the collar and lifted him until his small feet kicked several inches off the ground, shaking him like a terrier worries a rat. He was laughing and crying at the same time, though it was obvious he didn’t even realize it. “Help me find him, please! I HAVE to find him!” Joey continued to cry brokenly as Yugi wrenched himself loose from the distraught boy’s trembling grasp.
“Even though I’m on the Council, they wouldn’t let me in to the actual procedure! That’s what I was trying to tell you! Knowing the... condemned... is a breach of ethics, they said. I only waited here to say good-bye, Joey. It’s all I could do for him. I’m sorry.” He lifted his sorrowful gaze to Joey’s own, apologizing with his heart visible in his wide, violet eyes. “He -- he wasn’t afraid.”
Joey wasn’t listening however. His face had lit up again with a wild kind of hope. “You’re on the Council, pal! You can still help me find him!”
“They purge the records, Joey! The new data doesn’t even exist anymore, you KNOW that. I’m sorry, but... he’s gone.” These last words were spoken in a choked whisper as Yugi looked away, no longer able to meet his friend’s grief head on.
Joey took one lurching step backwards down the wide, stone stairway, but Yugi held onto him easily, the two falling to their knees on the concrete steps. They each wrapped their arms about the other as Joey wept bitterly, unmindful of both the busy downtown traffic and curious passers by. When the blond had finally calmed somewhat, he returned his friend’s concerned stare evenly. “You said -- you said he wasn’t scared?”
Yugi smiled gently. “No, Joey, he wasn‘t. He seemed almost... serene, really. He said to tell you...” The shorter boy thought back briefly, mindful of choosing the exact words spoken to him by Seto just a short while ago. “He said to tell you that he was glad he hadn’t led an unexamined life, after all. Do you know what that means?”
Joey nodded tersely as he attempted to wipe away the tide of tears that stubbornly refused to be stemmed, even now. “It means I’ve got a promise to keep. And no matter what else comes along, I’m gonna make sure that I do.”
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
As the hired limousine pulled up in front of their hotel, Joey gazed out at the quiet streets of the Culver Beach Colony. Tourism was practically nonexistent in the winter months, but he remembered being here years ago, one scorching-hot August, enjoying the seaside air, the food, the ritzy nightlife, the surf, the devastatingly handsome CEO at his side...
“Babe, I’m gonna head on up to the room for another nap, OK? I think you gave your headache to me, you inconsiderate jerk.”
Joey laughed softly at Tristan’s feigned distress. “Sorry. I would have warned ya if I knew it was contagious.”
“You coming up?”
“Nah. You go ahead. I think I’m gonna walk along the beach for a bit. Haven’t been here since... Well, it’s been a while.”
Tristan nodded in understanding and leaned over to kiss the side of Joey’s neck, carefully rearranging the blond’s scarf back over the spot where his lips had pressed. “Keep your scarf on, you hear me? That wind is freezing, and it only gets stronger the closer you get to the shore. I’ll be here waiting for you, when you decide to come back.” Joey’s beleaguered brain pondered the possible double meaning of these words as his husband tossed a casual wave over his shoulder and disappeared inside the hotel.
Joey walked for a short time until he’d left behind most of the hotels and high-rise structures, wandering into a more secluded area of beach properties consisting mostly of small, fully furnished bungalows with their own quiet sections of private shorefront. It was here that he and Seto had stayed so many years ago that distant summer, and Joey remembered being impressed that the billionaire had garnered them such humble accommodations, already knowing instinctively that Joey would be ill at ease in more opulent surroundings.
Nostalgia and longing gripped his heart fiercely as he meandered further, passing landmarks unchanged by the years, along with newer ones he didn’t recognize, until he was standing directly in front of the familiar grey beach house. It looked more weathered than he remembered, but basically no different than the pictures conjured in his mind.
No longer able to hold them back, he also recalled treasured moments from that glorious August week, laid out like snapshots in an album of his weary heart's making:
The whispered intimacy of one dinnertime confession -- Seto had never in his life tried shrimp before. “They look like giant insects,” he’d scoffed, deftly dodging the blond’s repeated attempts to trick him into opening his mouth. “You wouldn’t want to eat something you might come across in Weevil’s deck, now would you?” Laughing, Joey had acceded the point, and the offending delicacy had made no more appearances on that trip.
The pleasant surprise of learning that the cold, often distant-seeming CEO was in actuality a talented surfer, and though Seto himself had turned out to be wonderful instructor, Joey’s own attempts were less than successful, to say the least.
The summer cold he'd caught, forcing the two of them to spend a number of days solely indoors, holed up in the cozy bungalow. They'd passed Joey's convalescence by discussing their respective plans and dreams, and by making love in the garden hot tub, the hammock, or even, when Joey had been feeling up to it again, on the wet sand of the private strip of beach.
Staring out across the rapidly darkening horizon, Joey was taken swiftly back in time, feeling the firm yet sticky sand once again under his back, the sensation of Seto within his body, filling him to the breaking point, the cool ocean waves lapping rhythmically at their intertwined legs. He had stared wonderingly, blissfully, up at the two full moons overhead, alternating his ecstatic gaze between the handsome face above him, Seto’s blue eyes closed tight in concentration, full lips slightly parted and panting with exertion, and the newly-risen twin satellites, casting their hypnotic white glow over the entire scene, painting it with romance and mystery.
Tonight, as that same night so long ago, both moons were full and bright, and Joey found that pulling himself back into the present was one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do.
It was well past dusk when Joey turned to head back, spying a small family huddled around a fire pit, roasting hot dogs and marshmallows as they laughed and talked amongst themselves. One small boy of about ten was stubbornly running up and down the shoreline, trying in vain to get his box kite to soar in the listless nighttime breeze. As Joey started past, the father of the group rose just then, revealing his true height and standing silhouetted by the bright glow of one of the moons. Joey was instantly transfixed in place, his breath freezing in his lungs.
A voice he knew as well as his own, the voice that to this very day haunted his dreams and waking hours alike, broke through the ice in his chest, calling out in exasperation, “Michael! It’s getting too dark to fly that thing! Come over here and eat some hot dogs, will you? We’re leaving soon!”
Suddenly, Joey’s world began to move again, but far too quickly for his shocked mind to completely comprehend. As the father turned to look past the boy, his eyes caught Joey’s and the light of recognition dawned in them, bright and unmistakable in the deep blue depths. The man bent down, whispering something briefly in the ear of a woman sitting at the fireside. She too met Joey's gaze, giving him a distinctively odd look as she nodded absently.
Then, no matter how many times he tried to tell himself that this wasn’t happening, that he was lying in his own bed asleep, dreaming fitful dreams, Seto was crossing the sand toward him, taking long, purposeful strides over to where Joey was standing, still paralyzed.
“Joey? Joey Wheeler?”
Hearing that voice speak his name for the first time in fifteen years was finally enough to restore motion to his traitorous body, but only to the point that he nodded dumbly in assent.
“I thought that was you!” Seto turned back briefly to survey the small group behind him, waving cheerfully. He whirled to face Joey once more as he smiled and said, “My wife Lynn, that’s her over there, was telling me I was crazy, but I KNEW I recognized you!”
Joey had at last found part of his voice, and he stammered out, “S-Seto?”
The brunet frowned and looked puzzled for a moment, before smiling widely once again. “Don’t tell me we’ve met somewhere before! I’d be horribly embarrassed at not remembering! Anyway, you’re close, but it’s Seth. Seth Keaton.” He stuck his hand out in front of him as his smile brightened even further, if possible. “It’s an honour.”
Joey grasped Seto’s warm hand reflexively, biting back a soft groan as those oh-so-familiar slim fingers enveloped his own smaller ones for the first time in years. “Likewise.”
‘Seth’ pumped Joey’s hand vigorously as he babbled, “I’ve been an admirer of yours for a long time now, and I just wanted to let you know that we all appreciate what you did. It took real courage and lot of strong belief to challenge the system like that." He ducked his head and smiled shyly at Joey through lowered lashes. "Man, I’m terrible at this! I guess what I’m trying to say with all my rambling is that the everyday, common folk like me and my family can never thank you enough.” He finally stopped yanking up and down on Joey’s limp hand, looking a bit chagrined at his own eagerness.
It was the same speech, Joey had heard at least a million different versions, from a million different faces, but he’d never expected to hear it from THOSE lips. Lips he had kissed more times than he could count, lips that had murmured sleepy ‘I love you’s’ in the silent, predawn hours, or shouted his name to the heavens in the throes of passion. It was too much, too surreal for him to process, and he dimly heard his own voice replying by rote, “I did what I had to do. It was the right thing. Anyone would have done the same, in my stead.”
Seth laughed lightly and gave Joey a conspiratorial wink. “Oh, not just anyone, I’d bet. The thing is, all the Colonies are grateful to you. You should be proud. I’ve been following along on that Tulin kid's trial in the news every day, you know. You really deserve a pat on the back for that one, too." He turned introspective for a brief moment, and Joey was treated to a heartbreaking glimpse of the man he had once known and loved. "You know, I used to think about going to law school myself, but I knew I didn’t have the smarts for it.”
Hearing these unfamiliar, self-deprecating words brought Joey out of his shock and made him want to fall to his knees and cry. Cry for the first time since Seto had been gone from his life, cry for this man in front of him; this shell of the person he’d loved and been loved by in return, a shell filled with false hopes and dreams, false memories. Joey wanted to cry for himself and all that he had lost, but mostly... mostly he wanted to cry for Seto himself. Brave Seto, who had walked straight ahead with his eyes wide open, knowing what awaited him, staring fate in the face and trusting Joey to keep his memory alive, preserving the love they had shared by keeping it safe within his own heart. It was all Seto had asked of him, and Joey had spent nearly fifteen years denying that last request, intent on seeking out a person who no longer existed, and resurrecting a love that could never be again. Worse, he had promised Seto he would be true to himself, and he hadn’t even managed to do that. All of his accomplishments paled in comparison to that one simple failure, his unforgivable lapse of faith.
Joey finally, after all this time, understood Seto’s parting words to him, and as he stood underneath the stars on that cold beach, he met guileless, expectant blue eyes for the last time and intoned, “Don’t sell yourself short, Seth. A very wise, very special person once told me that you can do anything you put your mind to, as long as you search within yourself and find your inner strength. He also told me, ‘the unexamined life is not worth living'. Remember that, most of all, if nothing else. It means something a little different to everyone, I think, and half the journey is figuring it out for yourself.”
Seth stared back at Joey for a solemn moment, a slightly wistful and confused expression clouding his open face. Finally, he smiled cheerfully again, thrusting his hand out before him once more. “I’ll do that, Joey. It was a real pleasure meeting you.”
Grasping Seth‘s warm hand in both of his own, Joey shook it firmly, reluctantly releasing his hold after a torturous pause. “And you, Seth.”
Joey smiled sadly and turned his back, hands jammed into his front pockets and his shoulders hunched against the cold that tried to penetrate his coat and scarf. He made his way back up the beach from the direction he had come, as Seth returned to the warmth of both the firelight and his family’s embrace.
Joey walked on, not looking back, thinking of Tristan, waiting at the hotel for him, and also of a certain manuscript, locked in a safe deposit box back home in Domino.
After all that had happened, and all the effort he had wasted running away from the good, along with the bad, after all the times he’d shut out the love, in addition to the loss, Joey Wheeler decided that he finally had a story to tell.
~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~
the end
*****
*** Additional story notes - For the curious, it should be mentioned that this particular fanfic was prompted by a number of sources, primarily the great REM-sama and the S/J site, ‘A Dragon‘s Lair‘. The ADL challenges are frequently just TOO good for me to pass up, and this LOLAC deal was the perfect carrot to entice this particular mule.
In addition, this fic is technically a contest prize for LiveJournal user Yami_Chan, who requested a ‘Seto/Jou fic with a sci-fi twist.’ Well, Isaac Asimov it ain’t, but this was the best I could come up with on short notice. Sorry that you had to wait until the challenge was over to get it. Thanks for understanding. **hugs**
Also, this is in part dedicated to the one and only Anez, who sometimes thinks I make Seto a bit wishy-washy, and I’m usually inclined to agree. Usually. :-) This is for you, and your patience with my panicking, and my whining, and my general insanity.
As always, thanks beyond measure are due my lovely beta reader, Jennie B., and my rock of moral support, the incomparable Daisey. The MAS is alive and well, and thank god for that, or I would never have pulled this off.
Story inspiration and various triggers/ideas for the A/U itself are thanks in part to the major motion picture, ‘Minority Report’, one particular episode of ‘Star Trek:Voyager’ that got stuck in my brain, and also the songs, ‘One Moment More’ by Mindy Smith, and 'Only One' by Yellowcard. If any of you would like to have these songs for yourselves, drop me a line at ‘WhosJeebus@aol.com’ and I’ll be more than happy to send them your way. They're both gorgeous, moving, and perfect. Trust me, you WILL cry like a baby. They're THAT good.
So that’s it. Another fic is a wrap, and I’m done running off at the mouth. Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed, and I’ll see you around next time. Hopefully. ***
*****
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