Adult-FanFiction.org : Yu-Gi-OH

Ambivalence	By : PupshitDesu Category: Yu-Gi-Oh > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 4882 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: We do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or any associated properties therein. We do not profit from the creation of this work.

Chapter List
- 11
- 12
- 13
When Jonouchi woke up, he couldn't move. He was being restrained, and it wasn't until he regained more of his consciousness that he realized Kaiba's arm was draped over him. Jonouchi was hardly respecting personal space either, seeing as he was pretty much cuddled up to Kaiba. He felt soreness in his shoulder when he moved. The muscles were cramped from being pressed against the floor.
His eyes were open now, and he was staring at Kaiba in very close proximity. His face looked more feminine when he slept and the muscles relaxed. He hesitated to say that Kaiba looked like a girl, but the fact remained...
He tried to move. He didn't want Kaiba to wake up with him in his arms, and his shoulder was starting to actually hurt. He only made a little distance (as in, an inch or two) before Kaiba stirred and blinked his eyes open. Jonouchi caught his breath and didn't move.
He still remembered the night before, and he was sure that Kaiba did, as well. With that in mind, Jonouchi wasn't sure what to say. He'd have to see what kind of mood Kaiba was in. If he was pissed, then Jonouchi should probably just sit quietly in a corner until he could get out.
However, Kaiba was only groggy, rolling onto his back and brushing his bangs off his face with his hand. He didn't feel very good after sleeping on the floor, and he almost panicked about being late to work when he quickly realized that he was locked in the room and couldn't do anything about it. Did Isono even bother fixing the lock last night? For his job's sake, Kaiba hoped he did.
And picking up his phone from the coffee table, he was pleased to find a text from late that night.
Seto-sama: I didn't want to wake you, but the door works now.
-Isono.
Well, that was at least one thing going right in his day. The only thing, probably, because Jonouchi looked like he was about ready to die in a hole from embarrassment, and he was going to be late to the office. He didn't really know what to do with Jonouchi, and looked down at him before sighing. He didn't have time for this crap. This was why he hadn't gone any further the night before.
He'd assumed Jonouchi was going to wake up like this.
"The door works," he offered, pocketing his phone, "And I need to get ready for work. Mokuba's probably already gone, and you should be able to get breakfast at the kitchen. Just ask for the driver, he can send you whatever. I need to get going."
"Oh," Jonouchi blinked, surprised that Kaiba was just proceeding with business as usual. It seemed he wasn't about to be destroyed. "Okay, thanks. I'll just find my phone..."
Jonouchi stood and searched around for the device. Hopefully, if he kept his mind on what was ahead, he wouldn't feel so awkward. Still, what he'd done the night before plagued him. With how weird he'd felt after fooling around, and how he felt now, it had probably been for the best that they hadn't actually fucked. He hadn't expected it to be so strange like this.
"Hey Kaiba?" Jonouchi pocketed his phone and turned to face him.
"What is it?"
He had one foot out the door, and turned around to look at Jonouchi before sighing.
"I just...want to say thank you. For being smarter than me last night."
It was something of a peace offering, a way to let Kaiba know he was okay with what had happened while making him feel like he was right. He hoped Kaiba wouldn't be upset that he brought it up in the first place. He was acting like nothing had happened at all, which Jonouchi was fine with, but he didn't want to seem ungrateful.
"Like I said before. I don't want to complicate things."
He didn't smile or frown, his face unreadable before he just left the room. It wasn't his idea to get into a heated make out session with Jonouchi on his couch, in his personal office. Which was only because they were locked in together and one of them couldn't keep his sexual desires to himself. He almost felt bad, about what happened, but he couldn't be responsible for being kissed, and Jonouchi had gotten on top of him.
Hopefully nothing serious would come of it. He could at least admit to himself now that Jonouchi was a friend, but not anything else. Kaiba wasn't going to allow him much more than that.
"Right," Jonouchi sighed, leaving Kaiba's office to head downstairs, "I guess that's his way of saying "you're welcome"."
He wasn't exactly in a hurry. He still didn't have any fucking hours at his job, and he didn't have a new job yet, either. The only money he had to support himself right now was from Kitamura, but luckily that wasn't about to run out. He had his rent paid up for a while, and had plenty of spare money for groceries.
Shit. He really needed another job. Somehow, he was even less enthusiastic about Kitamura than before. Did he feel bad for "cheating"? He and Kaiba did technically have sex a little. There was no intercourse, but the intent had been there. The only reason he wasn't riding Kaiba's dick the night before was because Kaiba made him stop.
Jonouchi resolved that he would try not to be weird with Kaiba because of it. Kaiba hadn't asked him to do that shit. He'd vehemently opposed, in fact. He didn't need to be punished with awkwardness because Jonouchi couldn't keep his hormones under control.
Kitamura didn't even need to know, really. It wasn't like he was all that faithful, and he was hardly ever around. Jonouchi still wasn't even sure what the man was after, aside from a quick lay while he was in town. Whatever. He wasn't going to spare any pity for that guy. He didn't even think he'd have sex with him, after what had happened with Kaiba...
That heat he'd had in his dream hadn't just been in his head. He couldn't believe how excited he was the night before. He'd never had that kind of thing with Kitamura. He'd certainly never begged for more. Kind of made him wish Kaiba was interested. They wouldn't get along, but at least the sex would be better.
He shouldn't be thinking shit like that, though. Kaiba wasn't interested, and probably never would be. Jonouchi couldn't comfortably make any decisions about Kitamura until he had another job. He had a few interviews, and was trying to get the attention of some managers at a repair shop, but they kept blowing him off. He didn't have any formal education, certifications, or prior job experience.
But shit, he knew how to fix a bike. Motorcycles, too. His father had taught him, before he'd regressed completely into a drunk. The only reason Honda's old hunk of junk had run as well as it did under his treatment was because Jonouchi could help him keep it patched up.
He could hardly prove that, though. If only they'd give him a shot at it so he could show them...
Why couldn't he just make them listen? If he could force himself on Kaiba Seto, couldn't he convince some crabby mechanics to let him fix a bike?
Jonouchi was able to get breakfast by asking politely at the kitchens. The cook seemed surprised that he'd asked at all, but Jonouchi didn't feel right sitting in the dining room expectantly. He wasn't going to put on airs just because he was in a rich guy's house.
He ate quickly, trying to fill his stomach and get a ride to town promptly. He needed to start looking around for jobs again, and he had a lot of places to hit before sundown. He was going to be tired at the end of the day, but it wasn't that important. He didn't have hours at work again until the end of the week.
He felt so awkward asking Kaiba's driver for a ride. Jonouchi was hardly accustomed to being escorted, but the driver acted like it wasn't unusual at all. Well, it wasn't for him, right? It was his job. The person getting into the car probably didn't make much difference to him. Jonouchi wasn't going to complain about a free ride in a clean and comfortable car, rather than an expensive and less pleasant taxi ride.
When he was dropped off uptown, he was turning in slow circles on the sidewalk to decide where to go first when his phone vibrated. Kitamura and Mokuba were the only people who had his new cell number, and Jonouchi hoped to god that it was Mokuba.
Well, it was a booty call, so probably best that it wasn't Mokuba.
Kitamura had stayed more in touch, as promised, but it had only been little things. Estimates about when he'd be in town next, asking Jonouchi if he had enough money. Sometimes he made little bits of small talk, but that was about it. Jonouchi didn't mind the minimal contact. He still felt awkward with Kitamura as a person, and he figured the conversation would pick up when that passed. If it ever passed.
Jonouchi was asked to meet him at some Western-styled cafe a few blocks away. Kitamura claimed he had a surprise, which Jonouchi found suspicious and strange. Still, he walked to the cafe to meet him. It wasn't like Kitamura could do anything to him in public, in the middle of the day (and in the nicest part of town, to boot).
Kitamura was sitting at an outdoor table, dressed fairly casually for once. He was wearing sunglasses, though whether it was to be incognito or shield his eyes from the sun, Jonouchi didn't know. He greeted him with a smile, as usual. It was probably because he was "obnoxious" like an American, but Jonouchi preferred a friendly greeting to stoic nonsense. Kitamura made him feel intimidated at first glance, and Jonouchi was more at ease when he made an amiable gesture.
"You got here quickly," Kitamura noted as Jonouchi sat down, "Were you in the area?"
"Yeah," Jonouchi hesitated, "It's nice around here, so I was hanging out."
He chose not to tell Kitamura about his job hunt. He didn't know what the guy would think about that.
"I see. Are you hungry? I just had breakfast, but I'll order something for you if you like."
"Oh, I've eaten," Jonouchi replied, "I'm not hungry."
"Good," Kitamura stood up, and Jonouchi followed suit, wondering what was going to happen next. They were probably going straight to a hotel. Jonouchi wasn't sure he really wanted to. "Then, let's go find my car."
Jonouchi didn't speak and followed with his brow furrowing as he tried to decide what to do. Did he want to have sex with Kitamura? He wasn't really inspired to do it right now. He didn't even need the cash at the moment. He still had enough grocery money, and rent was paid up. But wouldn't Kitamura be pissed if he turned him down?
It didn't matter. Jonouchi was conflicted, and he wasn't just going to run along with it for Kitamura's sake. He opened his mouth to announce that he wasn't going, but Kitamura spoke before he did.
"Remember the surprise I mentioned?"
"Um," Jonouchi blinked, "Yes?"
"Well, I thought we could drive to the central district so you can go shopping. I didn't really leave you enough money for clothes, I don't think, and it'll be easier if I'm there to pay in person anyway."
Jonouchi stared at Kitamura in shock. Take him shopping for clothes? Jonouchi hadn't acquired new clothes since he'd been in high school. His current jeans were a little oversized and had the hems un-stitched so they'd still be long enough. He couldn't remember going shopping for new clothes since he was a kid, and his mother had made all the decisions at that point.
"Are you sure?" He asked, still wondering if there was some catch he was missing. "You don't have to."
Kitamura laughed, opening the passenger-side door of his American car for Jonouchi.
"I know I don't have to. It's a gift. You look like you could use some new clothes—no offense."
"None taken," Jonouchi muttered, getting into the car. He was still a little confused, but they weren't skipping straight off to have sex, so he figured he'd go along with it. Maybe he'd feel more comfortable after time out with Kitamura.
They went to the large mall that was on the edge of uptown and central. Most of the clothing outlets in there were so expensive that Jonouchi wouldn't dream of going there. It would take an entire paycheck to buy any one outfit, and that was if he shopped cheap. Kitamura didn't seem concerned, however. Jonouchi followed his lead, since he seemed to know where he was going.
"Do you know your size?" He asked. Jonouchi shook his head, his eyes wandering the enormous open space of the clothing warehouse. "All right. Let's look around."
Kitamura grabbed a few pairs of jeans from the shelf in front of them and tossed them over his arm before opening one of them. He looked at it thoughtfully, and then held the waistband up to Jonouchi's neck.
"What are you-" Jonouchi stared at Kitamura suspiciously as he wrapped the waistband around. Then he hummed in satisfaction and replaced the pants on his arm. Jonouchi was stunned into silence for a few seconds as Kitamura continued grabbing different styles and colors of pants, and then finally spoke.
"What the fuck was that?" He demanded, flustered. Kitamura looked back at him, raising one of his funny eyebrows.
"It's just a trick for pants sizes. If the waistband fits around your neck, it will fit your waist."
"Seriously?" Jonouchi tried to figure out the logic of that in his head. How could his neck be the same measurement as his waist? Or, half of his waist, rather. He confused himself trying to think it over and just dropped it. Kitamura seemed to know what he was doing. May as well take his word for it.
Kitamura had about a dozen different pairs of jeans by the time he was done looking over the shelf, and he motioned for Jonouchi to follow as he searched for a dressing room. Jonouchi had a feeling that trying on all those clothes would be tiring, but he didn't say anything about it. He wasn't going to complain about getting new jeans for free. Jeans that were actually in his size and brand new.
When they found an empty dressing room, Kitamura gave him the jeans while an attendant opened the door.
"I'll find you some shirts while you try those on," he stated before disappearing. Jonouchi just watched him round the corner before shaking his head and entering the stall. Figured Kitamura was Mr. Metropolitan. Mokuba had told him he was from California. That was probably why he knew so much about clothing. Or, maybe he was anal retentive about it like Kaiba.
Jonouchi tried on all the jeans he'd been given. They more snug than what he was used to, and he felt a little self-conscious about it, but when Kitamura returned and saw him in the pair he was wearing at the time, he told him he looked fantastic. Jonouchi assumed he probably knew better. The pants fit, so there was no reason to be difficult about it.
The shirts Kitamura brought him were infinitely more frustrating. Jonouchi started getting flustered and irritated in the booth as he tried on several of them. He didn't even know what Kitamura was trying to get him to look like, bringing him snug-fitting shirts and button-ups with seams that followed the curve of his torso. Still, when Jonouchi had a chance to look at himself in the mirror, he thought he looked pretty good. Pretty gay, but pretty good.
He was fed up with shopping by the time Kitamura paid for the clothes. Jonouchi was a little impressed that Kitamura had known what would suit him. It seemed like magic, frankly, but Kitamura claimed it was skill. He launched into an explanation of Jonouchi's body type and colors that suited him and why, but even after that Jonouchi was bewildered. Shopping for himself should be hard enough; Anzu had always complained about it when she needed new clothes. But Kitamura managed to basically do all his shopping for him. Maybe it was a talent.
"Where do you want to go next?" He asked when they stepped back into the main area of the mall. Jonouchi raised his eyebrows. He wanted to do more of this? Jonouchi was pretty sick of the mall by this time, and even if he wasn't, he didn't know if he was comfortable taking any more of Kitamura's money today. The clothes themselves had probably cost him about twenty grand, and that was a low estimate.
"Um, you really don't have to buy me any more stuff," Jonouchi muttered, "This shit is expensive."
"Hmm?" Kitamura seemed a little dazed by the statement, and then he looked outright amused. "Jonouchi, two hundred dollars is pocket money. Don't worry about it. Now come on, let's go see what else we can find."
Jonouchi followed, since he could hardly leave with arms full of bags anyway. Well, he could, but he didn't want to blatantly carry bags full of clothing through two districts and his home neighborhood. It would probably be evening by the time he got back, and at that point he'd just be asking for it.
Kitamura stopped at an area that was a bunch of glass booths for jewelry and expensive perfumes and colognes. Jonouchi was slightly offended, feeling that he didn't need anything to make him smell pretty, and he certainly didn't need any bracelets. He voiced his disgruntled opinion, and Kitamura found it funny. Jonouchi supposed he should be grateful that Kitamura found his mannerisms charming and not annoying.
"I'm not getting you bracelets," Kitamura pointed at what he had his eye on, "I'm getting you a watch, and maybe some cologne, if you're interested."
"A watch?" Jonouchi's brow furrowed. "I don't need a watch. I have a phone."
"It isn't a need, per se," Kitamura agreed, "But I think it would suit you. You'd look very dignified."
"Dignified? Me?" Jonouchi laughed. Kitamura raised an eyebrow. "Don't fight a losing battle, fella. I don't think I can look dignified."
"We'll see," Kitamura gave him a sly expression that was intriguing even as it was slightly disturbing. Jonouchi did end up with an overly expensive watch. It was gold, but not too shiny for his liking. He'd insisted on a face with actual numbers instead of Roman numerals. Kitamura gave in only because Jonouchi chided him about the fact that he didn't need a watch in the first place.
It felt heavy on his wrist for a while, but by the time Kitamura had found him some cologne, it didn't bother him anymore. He just reminded himself that he'd have to pocket it when he walked through his neighborhood. A gold watch would definitely get attention.
"Um," Kitamura seemed thoughtful after they finished at the jewelry booth. He was helping Jonouchi carry the bags, which Jonouchi had told him he didn't have to, but Kitamura insisted, claiming that Jonouchi wasn't a "pack mule".
"Um, what?" Jonouchi asked jokingly. He couldn't possibly be thinking to buy more crap...
"Your shoes," Kitamura noted, looking at them and pointing with one hand. Jonouchi was starting to think maybe he was gay after all. He looked down at his worn-out sneakers, wiggling his toes inside.
"What about them?"
"You could use new ones," Kitamura stated. Jonouchi scoffed.
"They're still holding together. They're fine."
"Come now, Jonouchi, take advantage of your resources. You don't have to hold on to ratty shoes until they wear out. I'll buy you new ones."
"If you insist," Jonouchi sighed, rolling his eyes. Kitamura happily took this as consent and led the way to the nearest shoe outlet. Jonouchi couldn't believe his energy. He was beyond done with the mall, himself. Then again, Kitamura was older. This was probably what he did for entertainment.
"How old are you, anyway?" Jonouchi queried. It was actually obscenely rude to ask someone their age outright, but Kitamura was an American man. He probably didn't care.
"I'm twenty-nine," he grinned, "And freshly, I might add. Don't worry, I'm not getting wrinkly on you."
Jonouchi snorted, but he was deeply relieved. If Kitamura was more than ten years older, he'd probably have to just leave. That was too much. Ten years wasn't bad. Jonouchi tended to like older people, or people who were more mature than his age group. It was much-needed stability for his immaturity. Hopefully Kitamura was telling the truth and wasn't actually thirty-five, or something. Jonouchi wasn't going to sleep with someone who could legitimately be his father.
"Sweet, sneakers," Jonouchi approached the designer brands that were on display. He did love expensive sneakers. He'd bought a pair, once, but that had ended up being a scam. He preferred to buy from legitimate outlets now, but they were so expensive...
"Oh," Kitamura looked distinctly unenthusiastic, "Well, that's fine, but work shoes would be more practical."
"What? Kitamura, I work in food service."
"Dress for success, Jonouchi," Kitamura winked, walking around to the other side of the aisle. Jonouchi followed him, wondering what he was after. Jonouchi wasn't going to wear some designer leather office shoes. That would be impractical and absolutely stupid.
"Ah, these should do," Kitamura presented a pair of shoes that weren't quite sneakers, though they had the shape and stitching. They were plain and black, which was awfully drab in Jonouchi's opinion. He preferred multi-colored shoes, hopefully white and blue.
"What are those?"
"They're like sneakers, but employers like them a little better," Kitamura had him sit on a bench and sat himself opposite. As he carefully removed the wads of paper from the inside of the shoes, Jonouchi watched with a sense of intrigue. He hadn't really expected Kitamura to be a shopper. He didn't seem gay, and he came off as the type who had his shopping done for him, to Jonouchi. Yet here he was, hand-picking clothing and accessories with such practiced efficiency that Jonouchi wasn't sure he was talking to the same person.
Maybe Kitamura was more interesting than he'd originally seemed.
"Here, try this one," he directed. Jonouchi took off one of his shoes and put on the black work sneaker. Kitamura bent to tie it for him, and Jonouchi cleared his throat uncomfortably. He could tie his own shoes, and he hoped Kitamura knew that. He probably did. More likely, he was taking advantage of how cramped the aisle was. His face was inches away from Jonouchi's lap, and Jonouchi couldn't help but stare at him as he tried to figure out if it was done purposely.
When Kitamura finished tying, he looked up questioningly, grinning when he saw Jonouchi's expression. Jonouchi squirmed uncomfortably and blushed. He couldn't really help it. Kitamura was probably the only person he knew who had a drive like his. Or, rather, Kitamura was the only person he knew who had a drive that surpassed his. They were in public, after all. Even Jonouchi wouldn't think about doing something in the middle of some upscale shoe store. Maybe if he was with a girl, he'd think about fooling around, since the worst that could happen was getting scolded by an attendant. But with a man? Bad idea. He didn't want to deal with everyone's judgment.
"Something on your mind?" Kitamura asked, his dark eyes sparkling with amusement. Jonouchi snorted.
"Nothing you didn't intend, I'm sure."
"Am I that obvious?"
"Yeah, pretty much," Jonouchi wasn't afraid to be frank. Kitamura hardly seemed upset that he was obvious.
"Well, I hope you don't disapprove of my "intentions"."
"We'll see," Jonouchi answered noncommittally as Kitamura sat up. He wasn't used to being approached quite like that. He'd been approached, of course, but in Japan it was customary to be more subtle. At least, it was with the older ones. And somehow, Jonouchi always managed to get the older ones on his tail.
Once it was confirmed that the shoes fit, Kitamura had Jonouchi wear them out. Jonouchi didn't even feel like himself. He wasn't used to pants hugging his hips and legs, shirts squeezing his torso, new shoes that were strange and firm compared to kicks...
He kept seeing his reflection in the windows of stores as they headed back for the parking lot. It took some time wearing the clothes and seeing himself in them before he really understood that he was looking at himself. And he didn't look bad, not by a long shot. Some designer crap was leaps and bounds better than shit he'd stolen from clotheslines and charity boxes, and his father, but he'd never had anything like it before.
He still wished he could have bought regular sneakers, though.
And he wasn't quite sure about the necessity of the watch, even though it didn't feel so strange on his wrist like it had at the beginning. He stared at it, watching the little second hand tick as Kitamura drove them back uptown. Jonouchi didn't think a watch suited him at all, really. It was too impractical for him. Or maybe too classy. Either way, he was perfectly happy checking his phone for the time. He wasn't old like Kitamura, he didn't need a watch to feel dressed.
His wrist still smelled like the new cologne he'd been bought. Kitamura had made sure he liked it before buying it, thank god, so the smell did appeal to him. It wasn't a scent he could describe. He didn't know enough about that kind of thing to say. But Kitamura had told him there was anise and bergamot. Jonouchi didn't know what those were, but they smelled okay. They suited him.
When they got back to Kitamura's hotel room, Jonouchi dumped all his bags in the closet to be handled in the morning. He figured he may as well have sex, since he hadn't in a while, and Kitamura hadn't put him in a mood or anything. He'd actually been pleasant. Jonouchi hadn't spent so many hours of time with him before sex before, and if it weren't for the fact that sex was a fixed result of their outing, it might be a little romantic.
Romantic? Fuck, now he sounded like Kaiba. Forget that.
"I guess I'll take a shower," Jonouchi stated after he'd slipped his shoes off. Kitamura was in the bedroom emptying his pockets and leaving the contents on the entertainment center. He looked back at him, seeming thoughtful. And by thoughtful, Jonouchi obviously meant vacant. Kitamura's face somehow looked less strange when he was vacant. His curvy lips and angular brows were less intense.
"You don't need to," Kitamura told him, approaching. Jonouchi stopped in the bathroom doorway, raising his eyebrow.
"What's this? Not worried I'm dirty?"
"No," Kitamura chuckled, holding Jonouchi's shoulders and leading him back toward the bed, "But you're about to be."
Jonouchi closed his eyes when Kitamura kissed him. This was new. Usually when they had sex, everything was so deliberate that it was alienating. He was puzzling over Kitamura's motives when his knees hit the bed and he fell back onto it. He looked up to see what Kitamura was going to do, but the man was already coming down on him. Jonouchi tried reciprocating the kiss, trying to get more into it. It wasn't bad, by any means. Kitamura was pretty good at kissing.
But he couldn't get it out of his head that it had been better with Kaiba. Jonouchi didn't know why, even. When he'd kissed Kaiba, it had been awkward and tentative at first. Kitamura was confident and heated, and Jonouchi liked that kind of thing, so for the life of him he couldn't figure out why it just didn't feel the same.
He opened his eyes again when Kitamura straightened. He watched him unbutton his shirt, discarding it and his belt before he crawled over the bed. Jonouchi figured it was a good time to move closer to the headboard to allow for more room, and once he'd settled there, Kitamura met his lips again. Jonouchi could tell he was more into it. Not only more than he'd been on previous occasions, but more than Jonouchi was, obviously. Jonouchi felt more guilty than anything. He should definitely be enjoying this more.
Kitamura had one hand on his face, fingers tangling into his hair. He used the grip to tilt Jonouchi's head and started trailing kisses down his neck, nipping sensitive places. It was more stimulating, and Jonouchi jumped in surprise at the little bites. Kitamura wasn't exactly aggressive, not since the first time (that had been more forceful than anything), but that little bit of assertiveness stirred Jonouchi.
He was starting to enjoy it when Kitamura stopped, making a questioning sound.
"What's the matter?" Jonouchi asked, looking at him. "Don't stop."
"There's a mark on your neck," Kitamura muttered. He seemed to be observing it more closely, trying to figure out what it was. Jonouchi managed to keep his breathing even. He'd completely forgotten about Kaiba's little love bite.
"I got bitten," Jonouchi explained, "I had problems with pests last night."
It wasn't a complete lie, was it?
"Oh," Kitamura seemed satisfied enough with this explanation, and ran his thumb over the mark. "It looks like it's bruising a little. You should keep an eye on it."
Jonouchi didn't answer. He felt Kitamura's lips working against the spot where his "bug bite" was, and felt distinctly uncomfortable. Not only because it made his mind travel back to Kaiba, but because he felt somehow like Kitamura was erasing it.
"Uh, don't do that," Jonouchi muttered, "It's irritated."
Kitamura didn't reply, but he moved his attention to the other side of Jonouchi's neck. When he reached the nape, Jonouchi stiffened at the feeling of teeth pinching the skin and sucking. Not that it was unpleasant, but Jonouchi wasn't sure how he felt about Kitamura leaving a mark.
Shit. Why was he fine with Kaiba doing that, and not his boyfriend? Jonouchi was starting to think he was a bad person. Not a good person who did bad things, but an actually bad person.
When Kitamura was done sucking on it, he planted gentle kisses over it almost apologetically. Probably because it pinched a little. Jonouchi hadn't noticed as much the night before with Kaiba. He'd been too hot at the time. Now, though, he was less impassioned, and the pinching feeling was acutely obvious.
Jonouchi pushed up on Kitamura's chest, and met resistance at first, but Kitamura eventually yielded and sat back on his heels. He looked at Jonouchi questioningly, and seemed like he was about to ask about it, but Jonouchi grabbed his shoulder and shoved him on his back. Kitamura looked surprised, and slightly concerned. Maybe he thought Jonouchi was trying to top.
He didn't complain as Jonouchi unfastened his jeans and started rubbing his erection through his underwear. Whatever discomfort he'd felt about being on his back slowly faded, and he closed his eyes when Jonouchi pulled his pants and boxers down his hips. He wrapped his hand around the shaft, stroking slowly. Kitamura was far more excited than he was. Jonouchi was barely hard himself, and was hoping that he wasn't going to have trouble getting it up. He was the younger of them, and certainly shouldn't have a problem with that.
Kitamura's breathing was shallow, and Jonouchi watched the sheets wrinkle up as he clutched them. It was strange seeing him like that. Usually he just guided Jonouchi to do things, and so forcefully that Jonouchi hadn't thought he had the option to lead. He'd instigated with Kaiba, obviously, but Kaiba seemed far more willing to let things happen to him.
Jonouchi held Kitamura's dick around the base and wrapped his lips around the head, sucking carefully. He rested his tongue over his lower row of teeth to keep himself from scraping anything. He heard Kitamura's breath hitch, and felt self-satisfied about it, but was unable to smirk with his mouth full. He'd only done this once, and even then he'd been guided the whole way through. Not that he was going to get any awards for being good at giving head, but he was proud of the response he got all the same.
When he started bobbing his head, Kitamura's hands got tangled up in his hair, and he felt a little bit of pushing, but not so much that he couldn't move freely. It seemed they were avoiding an incident like the last time. Jonouchi was a little surprised, honestly. Kitamura hadn't seemed very concerned with how little he had enjoyed the experience.
He heard Kitamura's haggard breathing, and felt him bucking up. That wasn't going to fly. Jonouchi rested his forearm over his pelvis to keep him lying flat. He wasn't planning to gag today, certainly not when he could easily avoid it. He was still just shocked that Kitamura was letting him have his way. Jonouchi was grateful for it, since as the leading partner, Kitamura didn't bring the aggression he craved. Not the way he wanted it. Kaiba had done things right. Jonouchi wasn't opposed to being thrown onto his back and pounded, having his hair pulled, being bitten and marked...
He wondered how Kaiba would respond to oral sex. Would he even allow that? Probably not, but Jonouchi wasn't required to be realistic in his fantasies. Kaiba had enjoyed grinding. Jonouchi wondered if he'd moan during oral sex. If he'd start to shake from trying to buck up and not being allowed. He felt guilty about it, but he started to envision the situation while he gave Kitamura head, too fascinated with the idea of doing it to Kaiba not to let himself fantasize outright.
Apparently it was improving his performance, because Kitamura started moaning. It wasn't even breathless, or quiet. He was openly moaning, and the first time he even cut off quickly and caught his breath like he was surprised he'd done it. Jonouchi didn't fight him when he started using the grip on his hair to make him bob his head. It wasn't too much, like it had been the last time. Jonouchi could still breathe, and when he refused to let himself be pulled again, Kitamura eased up.
Jonouchi lifted his head and wiped his lips. He wasn't sure what to think about Kitamura's smell. The musk of sex was arousing, obviously, but Kitamura's individual scent was something he was still unaccustomed to.
"You okay?" He asked. Kitamura hadn't moved, and was still lying flat with his eyes shut. The only shifting he had done was resting one hand on his forehead, his fingers tangling into his bangs.
"Yes," he replied, sitting up unexpectedly and tugging on Jonouchi's shirt front, pulling him into a heated kiss. He was surprised by that, since Kitamura was hardly ever spontaneous, but he didn't fight it. The desire behind it made him more engaged. It was nice feeling wanted rather than just lusted after. It was a strange thought to Jonouchi, since they should both have the same result, but there was an obvious difference he couldn't explain.
Jonouchi arched into Kitamura's touch when he started rubbing at the front of his pants, and moved forward as he was pulled into his lap. It was reminiscent of the night before, when he'd been grinding on Kaiba, but Kitamura didn't lie down and just let things happen. He held Jonouchi's hips, guiding him to grind. Jonouchi rested his hands on Kitamura's shoulders. It was less awkward than just leaving them at his sides, and the added contact was nice.
He was starting to get excited, at least more than he usually did. Kitamura was more impassioned than normal, though, and seemed less determined to have absolute command of the situation. It made Jonouchi more comfortable, and for a few moments, as he was grinding in his lap, his mind didn't wander back to doing the same with Kaiba.
Then he was pulled back abruptly, and he blinked in surprise when Kitamura flipped around and let Jonouchi fall on his back. It was a little sudden, but Jonouchi wasn't reluctant to get to actually fucking. Not quite as eager as Kitamura seemed to be, but not reluctant.
He tugged his unreasonably tight shirt over his head while Kitamura worked on his pants, and he waited while the other man slid out of his jeans. Then he seemed to remember something, and picked up the discarded pants, fishing through the pockets urgently.
"Um," Jonouchi raised an eyebrow, "Is something wrong?"
Kitamura didn't respond, and looked frustrated, but then he pulled a condom and a small packet of lube out of his pants pocket. Had he thought he'd forgotten them? The idea alarmed Jonouchi, and he resolved that he should just start bringing condoms and lube with him when he went places. Specifically, when he met Kitamura.
...Or Kaiba.
He didn't have time to dwell on it. He gasped when Kitamura grabbed his ankles and pulled him toward the foot of the bed. Jonouchi didn't have a problem with him wanting to stand, if that was his preference, but he flushed red when he was flipped onto his stomach. Kitamura seemed determined to do doggy all the time, for whatever reason. Jonouchi didn't know what to think of it. He didn't feel as insulted as he had last time, but he wasn't sure he was fine with it.
He closed his eyes when Kitamura had him raise his hips and support himself with his knees. Since he was yet undecided, Jonouchi chose to go along with it. He could kick Kitamura away if he figured out later that he wasn't happy with the position. For the moment, though, he huffed against the sheets as a slick finger pushed into him. Jonouchi couldn't really complain about Kitamura's preparation technique (first night aside). He was efficient, but not too fast, like he had enough experience to know the limits. He probably did, if the rumor he'd heard from Kaiba was true.
Jonouchi was starting to rock into his fingers and tug at the sheets by the time he could get two in and out without resistance. Kitamura had never really teased him with fingering before. It had always just been a precursor to actual penetration, which was fine, but Jonouchi preferred being made to want it over having it thrust upon him.
"Are you ready?" Kitamura asked, holding his hip with one hand. Jonouchi realized it was the first time he had ever asked.
"Yes," Jonouchi panted, waiting for the far more taxing feeling of penetration. There was a significant difference between a couple of slim fingers poking around in there, and an unrelentingly stiff cock. Kitamura was a little larger than average, in width most noticeably, and Jonouchi was sure that it took its toll.
Still, Jonouchi wasn't complaining. He enjoyed the sensation when he wasn't getting ripped up, and Kitamura hadn't done that since the first time.
He held his breath as Kitamura pushed in. His mind blanked, and suddenly any ability to think was replaced with an acute awareness of the feeling of pressure and almost unbearable level of sensation in his lower body. He started stroking himself, perhaps prematurely, but he didn't want his excitement to ebb away. He was already starting to get a little disinterested when the initial level of pleasure flatlined and Kitamura was making slow thrusts.
Jonouchi wasn't sure what his problem was. It didn't make sense to be more excited by dry humping with Kaiba than he was by actual humping with his boyfriend. He started getting hotter from it when the pace picked up, but it still wasn't quite enough. Jonouchi's free hand wove into his hair, and he started tugging at it in frustration. He wanted more. He wanted something that excited him like Kaiba had, both in person and in the dream he'd had. Surely, Kitamura was capable of doing something for him...
"Pull my hair," he demanded, and he frowned when Kitamura stopped for a moment.
"What?"
"Pull my hair," Jonouchi repeated, more forcefully. He couldn't see Kitamura's expression, but he didn't move for a second or two. Then, thankfully, he got a fistfull of Jonouchi's hair and pulled back on it enough that it forced him to raise his head. His spine arched, and he cried out when his prostate was struck for the first time that evening. He was more relieved than anything. He didn't want to have boring sex. There wasn't any gratification in it if he had to jerk off afterward.
Kitamura had a hard grip on his hip, and it only got tighter as he started thrusting faster. Jonouchi didn't bother trying to stop the memories of his wet dream from returning. If it made the sex more enjoyable, he couldn't really get upset about it. He wished he could have gone all the way with Kaiba. It was probably just his boner talking, but right now he regretted not doing more.
Jonouchi felt Kitamura's breath on his back. The other man was leaning over him, panting against his skin. Jonouchi kind of wished he would say something. Not so much ask after his well being as...talking dirty, he supposed. He didn't even know why he liked that kind of shit, but it worked for him.
It didn't seem like that was going to happen, though, and Jonouchi wasn't going to ask for it and risk surprising Kitamura into stopping again. He took what he could get, his eyes shut deliberately as he thought about his dream, and about what might have happened that night on Kaiba's couch if he'd been more prepared and Kaiba had been less reserved.
He started moaning, his volume increasing the closer he got to orgasm. He could still hear Kaiba's voice in his head, the things he'd said in the dream, and for some reason his comment about roosters in the henhouse came to mind. Jonouchi disregarded it in favor for focusing on the sexual aspect. He was close, and from Kitamura's responses to all the noise he was making, it seemed he was as well.
He felt erratic, hard, desperate thrusts, and envisioned Kaiba doing it, so lost in the sex that he lost his carefully cultivated self-control. It was a good simulation, even if Kitamura didn't tug his hair the same way Kaiba did, and his body was obviously different. The only thing that was really missing was the corrective measures, in all honesty.
Jonouchi panted, trying to catch his breath enough to say something. He was dangling at the edge of his climax, desperate to get release. The hand that he wasn't using to stroke himself was clutching the blanket hard enough that the fibers began to tear.
"Kitamura," he called, and rather than a verbal response, he felt lips on his shoulder. Good enough. "Kitamura, slap me."
Kitamura made that questioning sound again. He missed a beat, and he straightened, as if he wasn't sure if he should continue. Jonouchi felt the haze of arousal dispersing a little and growled in frustration.
"Just slap me," he almost shouted, and then he cried out in surprise when he actually did get slapped hard on his right buttock. He could still feel the sting when Kitamura stopped pulling back on his hair and shoved his face against the bed roughly instead, forcing him into full downward dog as he pounded into him. Jonouchi responded with shameless moaning, climbing desperately toward orgasm and hoping that the mental imagery would carry him there.
He came first. He shouted, and then shuddered, falling limp against the bed as Kitamura groaned behind him and had his own release almost immediately after. Jonouchi lay flat on the bed when Kitamura let go of his hair and hip, and he felt the weight of the other man falling in beside him. Jonouchi had his eyes closed, and was ignoring the feeling of cum on his stomach and hand for a few seconds so he could get some blood back in his brain.
When he felt it was safe to try, he stood up and staggered to the bathroom to wash his hands and torso. After he got back to the bedroom, Kitamura was still lying with his eyes shut, breathing heavily, the condom discarded on the nightstand. Jonouchi returned and lay down again, and Kitamura spoke.
"What came over you?" He asked, though he sounded more flirtatious than questioning. Jonouchi was interested by that. He'd thought Kitamura would freak out about his demands.
"I like it when things are interesting."
"I see," Kitamura chuckled. Jonouchi couldn't see his face; he was lying on his side with his back to him. "You could have told me earlier, you know."
"I didn't think you were into in that," Jonouchi shrugged as best he could while lying down.
"Oh, I'm into it. I didn't think you were. You seemed very timid."
"What?" Jonouchi turned around, staring at Kitamura incredulously. "Since when?"
Kitamura looked a little cautious, and was leaning away from Jonouchi. Maybe he thought he was angry.
"Apparently I misinterpreted you."
Jonouchi scoffed and lay back down, settling in. The bed was comfortable, and after a long-ass day at the mall followed by hard sex, he was ready to at least get a nap. It was early evening, closer to dinnertime than bedtime. He wondered if Kitamura was staying or not. He never did before, since he always had something important to do. Maybe tonight he wasn't preoccupied. He didn't seem to be in any real hurry.
Through the haze that had settled over him while he relaxed, he heard a phone vibrating. It wasn't his; he left the ringer on all the time since he wasn't at work. He felt the bed shift, and Kitamura got up. Jonouchi heard him walking around the room, heard the shuffling sound of clothes and the metal clinking of a belt buckle.
"Jonouchi?"
Jonouchi opened his eyes and looked at Kitamura, who was now dressed. He'd even managed to get his hair fixed up.
"Kitamura?"
"I have to go," he stated, sitting at the edge of the bed briefly. Jonouchi wasn't even mad. He hadn't been left hanging like last time, and he was pretty much accustomed to Kitamura ditching after sex by this point.
"Yeah, I know."
"I left you some money on the nightstand. If you need help with your clothes tomorrow, let me know. I can get you a taxi."
"Okay," Jonouchi yawned. He honestly didn't know what he was going to do about the clothes. There were four bags, two full of heavy clothes, one for cologne, and the last a box with his worn-out sneakers inside. If he tossed the sneakers and put the cologne in a clothing bag, there'd be two. But he'd still have to find a way to get them into his apartment without getting noticed. He'd probably have to do it at dawn, when the gangs went to sleep and the neighbors weren't awake yet.
"I'll be in touch," Kitamura promised, standing and heading for the door. Jonouchi closed his eyes and sighed tiredly. He felt relatively satisfied, but he was already getting his second wind. It was a little disappointing. When he heard the door shut, he turned of the bedside lamp and set an alarm on his phone. It was an early bedtime, but if he slept now, then getting up at the crack of dawn wouldn't be too difficult the next day.
- 11
- 12
- 13
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Ambivalence