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And now, he's gone...	By : SatuChiyoko Category: Yu-Gi-Oh > General Views: 1014 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own YuGiOh!, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-And now, he's gone...
- 1
And now, he's gone...

Warning: Suicide. A few time jumps, but I
hope it�s not confusing or anything�
Enjoy reading ^^

The scent of alcohol hung in the thick air
of the tomb. The tomb wasn't very old but dust had gained every single
centimeter of it. Nobody had been here for almost sixteen years now, not even
her own husband, his father. Nobody, not even his sister nor his brother had
been here in all these years, nobody but him. As a little child he always had
gone to her tomb secretly. For him, it hadn't been allowed to come here,
because he was the one who had killed her. He had killed his own mother. This
was on of these things he was able to remember exactly, it was one of these
sentences he had heard every single day in childhood by his father.
Malik had killed his mother because he was
born.
He inhaled the old air from the room and
opened his eyes. He knew he was drunk, his father used to be drunk a lot too,
and every time his father had been drunk, Malik had been hit by him. Almost
every day. But now, this wasn't important now.
Nothing was
important anymore...
Malik sat down on his mother stone coffin
and turned to the letter he had tried to begin a few minutes ago. But no words
seemed to come into his mind, and the paper reminded blank again. Did he even
want to tell them something? Anything?
He closed his eyes and a sigh escaped his
lips. Of course, he couldn't just go, without a message why he was gone.
Perhaps there were still people that liked him. Perhaps... not.
Ryou had told him earlier that he couldn't
stand being around him anymore. But he loved
Ryou. And now, he wasn't able to be around his love, and soon, Ryou would leave
Egypt. Isis was always somewhere else, never at home, with him, and so was
Rishid. The only person he saw every day, was the person that had brought him
no more than destruction. His Yami would never leave his side, but sometimes,
Malik wished he would. The only person that show interested in him, was his
other half while beating him senseless for no reasons at all.
So nobody was there that still liked him...
and so, nobody would miss him.
Nobody would be sad that he left. But would
they even realize him being not here?
He would never know.

************

Malik ran through the sandy streets of the
town. The early sun was hiding behind clouds and wouldn't come out before the
moon had disappeared from the sky. The air wasn't too hot and many people were
outside. The took advantage of the not so warm atmosphere to get their work
done. At noon, nobody would be on the streets anymore, except of tourists.
Ryou and Bakura were here on vacation.
Their father had brought him here, he had to work while Ryou had summer
holidays. Malik hadn't seen Ryou for the last days because Ryou had got an evil
sunburn in the first few days in Egypt. But today, he would be able to see his
friend again.
The Egyptian boy stopped in front of an
hotel where the Ryou and Bakura were staying. He entered and asked for Ryou's
room number. The air in the hotel was cooler than outside and everywhere were
little water pools with fish in it. He hadn't been in this kind of expensive
hotel very often and wondered about how rich Ryou's father had to be.
He climbed the stairs to Ryou's room and
knocked softly on the door. Nobody seemed to answer, so he knocked a little
louder again, and again, and again, as suddenly the door opened. Ryou stood
there, he looked angry and his chocolate eyes seemed to glow as Bakura's always
did.
"Hi" was all, that escaped
Malik's lips and "humph" was the whole answer from the white haired
boy who turned round and left the door open so Malik could come in.
"What do you want?" Ryou sat down
on the bed and glared at Malik while he was crossing the room to sit next to
him. Malik realized that Ryou's voice was unnormal aggressive.
Malik sit down on the bed next to him.
"I just came here to see you. I wanted to talk to you, that's all."
Ryou was just staring out of the window and into nowhere at the horizon.
"What's wrong, Ryou?"
The white haired Hikari looked at him for a
moment, then continued staring outside, his voice aggressive like before as he
began to speak. "You wanted to talk to me about your problems, don't you
Malik?"
"Uh, yes. You see..." Malik's
voice faded and he covered his face with his hands, so nobody would see the
pain in his eyes. Showing his weakness to others felt terrible for him. He
started again, this time his voice as stable as possible. "You see, Isis
and Rishid are always away and I don't even know, where they are. They are
rarely at home, just when something is with my school or something was wrong in
their job. And when they are at home, I don't see them much either because it's
mostly somewhere around 2 a.m."
Ryou still was staring into nowhere. He
chewed on his lip as if he was deep in thought. Malik continued to tell him a
bit surprised that Ryou didn't even seem to listen to him. "When they are
on vacation, I can't go with them. They have lot's of reasons, why it isn't
possible. They are often on holiday while I have school so I can't go with
them. Or it's just a work-holiday and they would have no time for me. Or they
say they need a little times for themselves...
They are ignoring me all the time. Ryou,
please help me, what should I do? Why are they so strange, why don't they want
me around them anymore? What did I do wrong...?"
A small sniffle could be heard through his
hands that were still covering his face. he liked his sister and Rishid so
much. They were the only two people in his life, who had been there all the
time. He loved them so much as someone could love his family. They were all he
still had.
And now, they didn't want him around
anymore.
Malik was carried away from his bitter
thoughts as Ryou whispered something. Now, they were looking each other
straight into the eyes. Ryou's chocolate orbs still held their glowing, and he
whispered something again.
"Hm?" Malik couldn't make out
what it was and so Ryou repeated it once more, this time, much louder.
"You're selfish."
"I'm.. what?" Malik raised an
eyebrow, did Ryou really say this?
"You're selfish!" Ryou jumped up
from the bed and stood there like being able to attack his enemy every second.
The Egyptian boy was too surprised to do anything.
"Malik Ishtar! You are a selfish
bastard! You know that?"
Malik just sat there not able to move. How
could... how could Ryou call him a bastard? Ryou slowly became more and more
louder and aggressive as any time before. He wasn't the type of boy screaming
at others but this time even he seemed to lost his patience.
"You come here all the time, tell me
about your stupid life, about your stupid problems, about your stupid being! I
do not care! I do not care a damn thing about your so big problem, Malik! Don't
you think I have my own? There lot's of people having problem! But they don't
go crying to their best friend! They are solving their problems! I do have my
own! I had a big argument with my dad just this morning! I have enough to think
about now!"
"Ryou, I'm..." Malik tried to
hold back tears. Ryou was screaming at him, Ryou, is only and best friends
wasn't caring about any of his problems. And he thought he could tell his best
friend everything.
"I'm sick of it, Malik! I'm so sick of
it all! I've lost my sister Amane, I lost my mom! I had big problems of my own,
Malik. I still have them. And every time you come here you tell me yours. I'm
so sick of it. I don't want to hear any of it anymore. Stop teasing me with
that! Stop teasing me with anything!"
"Ryou, I'm sorry!" Malik stumbled
towards Ryou and slang his arms around him. he nuzzled his face in Ryou's
shoulder. he was sobbing uncontrollable. "I'm so sorry Ryou. I didn't want
to bother you. I just feel so lonely, I'm sorry, I..."
"No! Stop it! Malik, stop it!"
Ryou pulled away from the hug and Malik stumbled a few meter back. Ryou grabbed
his wrist and pulled him towards the door. "Leave me alone! Don't come
here again! Please Malik, don't come here again. I don't want to see you
anymore..."
Malik's watery eyes widen. Don't come...
again? Never again? But he loved him! he loved Ryou!
"Ryou! Pleaselovelove you... I don't
want to leave..."
And the room became silent, just Malik's
sobs could be heard for a few moments. He looked up to Ryou, who still held his
wrist. They were outside the door, Ryou kept staring at the wall before him. he
wasn't looking at Malik even for a second. Suddenly, he released Malik's arm
and turned round.
"No! Go! Leave, now!"
He door slammed shut.

This hadn't been the Ryou he knew, this
couldn't be his Ryou! And it all felt
so strange...

************

Dear
Ryou,
I
love you. I never thought I would say this, But now, I do. I love you with all my
heart, I love you more than anything else I know. But you just push away.
I
fall in love with you in Battle city, right when I met you. I have met Bakura
earlier, but he was never more than a very close friend. If you can even call a
Yami that. But you were something different. As you came into this big stadium
I directly fall in love with your eyes. They were so much different than
Bakura. They were soft, full of emotion and so pure, something I had lost when
I just a little kid. on consoling the others. He couldn't start crying too.
Ryou sniffled as he wiped his tears with
his sleeve out of his chocolate eyes. Malik... had loved him? Malik had really loved him? Of course, he had said the
three words when they last saw each other, when Ryou had thrown him out of his
apartment. On that special day... And Ryou had never believed it. Malik really
loved him. Him. Malik had said, he looked pure. But he wasn't. He wasn't pure.
And now, all Ryou wished was to be able to tell him this. To tell him that he
was no angel. To tell him that he wanted to be as close to Malik as possible,
to be able to touch him, to be able to kiss
him...
He wanted to tell him, that the apology was
accepted... That he loved him too.
But now Malik was... gone.

************

Malik looked up from the letter, his
lavender orbs full of tears. Ryou, his angel. Not really his, but soon he would
be able to dream of the angel all the time. Then, he would own his angel for
eternity and more.
He could dream of Isis and Rishid too. That
they had been a nice little family, that they had been happy, that everything
had been all right. But these words were nothing more than lies, awful lies,
like big black holes. They had never been a happy family. When He had been
young, his father hadn't done anything to make them feel happy, but everything
to make them feel sad and angry. No happy family. Just big, awful lies.
After Battle city, he though they could
have a new start, a new life. Isis and Rishid had wanted to go back to Egypt.
Malik hadn't known if he wanted to go back too, he just went back with them. He
went to school every morning, came back in the afternoon. Isis and Rishid were
normally away, at work or a place he didn't knew about. At first, they always
had been at home when he had come. But as more and more time went by, he lost
contact with them. They didn't spoke so much like in the beginning and he saw
them two times in a week if he was lucky.
Why didn't they want him around anymore?
Just why?

n lan lang=EN-US>I
said you are my shadow, Rishid.
One
of the closest things you can have and the one of the few things that will
never leave you is your shadow. A true servant, always accepting you and the
things you're doing. Normally, a shadow can't save you, but you did. You're
special, Rishid. You always were special to me. The man who cared for me since
I was a baby, the man who were always there on my side, the man who were my
servant, the man who was my best friend, the one who was my brother. That's all
you, Rishid, everything of these things. And you also mean this much to me.
I
hope you haven't forgotten. I needed you in the last time, but you turned
around and left me. I didn't know why. You left me, sis' left me. And I don't
have a clue why you two did that. I'm sad and I want to know:
Aren't
you my shadow anymore?
protected me like Rishid when I was a child. You protected me while I wanted to
kill you. You had the chance to turn round and leave me to face my destiny, my
death. But you came and saved me because you loved me. You have said, you're my
sister and you would never leave me. You loved me with all your heart, because I'm
your brother.
But
now, you left me, Isis. I don't understand why. I love you too and I never
wanted to loose you. You had to stay away from me, so you wouldn't be harmed.
Harmed by me. I could never forgive myself if I would hurt you in any way. I
don't want you to cry because of me. I just wanted you around and live with my
sister and my brother like a normal family. But now, it seems like I have done
something wrong. But what did I do wrong? I don't know, I don't know! I wish
you would have told me...
Don't
you love me anymore, Isis?

************

Isis carefully reached out to t the the
cold cheek. The lavender orbs she had loved so much were closed. She stepped
away from him and left the room, starting to run after her first few steps. She
never wanted to stop running now. She wanted to be away from all this, from
that room, from that house, from that country and also away from him. She wanted to be with him.
She was so confused.
She never meant to be hiding from her
brother. She still loved him as his sister, as much as she could. That wouldn't
change. But then, why he saying all these things. She wasn't at home very
often. Work was always there, she was the whole day at the museum, together
with Rishid. She never meant to hide from her brother. She never wanted to make
him feel like she didn't want him to be around.
always find someone, on the streets, in the bars, it didn't matter to him where
or even who. And Malik didn't care too as long as his Yami wasn't beating him
senseless.
< lan lang=EN-US>He had thought the whole time till now, the
whole day, about Ryou. What happened there... And nothing was going to make
sense. So he just, put theughtught in the last corner of his mind and let them
rest there. He couldn't think about it any more. And going crazy about it was
no possibility.
Isis should be here in a few hours, and he
was supposed to do the housework as every day. Malik stepped into the kitchen
and looked over the mess of dirty dishes in the sink. He sighed and began to
search for a towel in the cupboard while waiting for the water to fill the sink
completely.
He never had to do housework while he was
still a child, while he was still living with his father. They had servants who
had done everything like cleaning the floor or cooking something to eat.
Sometimes, he remembered that he had wanted to help the servants with their
work. They had played with him sometimes though. But at some time, his father
had found and had made sure Malik would never do servant's work again in his whole live. Now, his father was gone,
in the realm of the dead or wherever and Malik was doing this
"woman's" work everyday. A little smiled appeared on his lips at the
thought of how his father would react finding out.
Then, the porcelain plate burst into
hundreds of pieces on the cold stone floor. Seconds later he heard his Yami
screams. But not because of his and Bakura's so called games upstairs in
Mariku' bedroom. It was an angry scream and of course no good omen. Malik
kneeled down to pick up the sharp pieces of the plate he had dropped. When
steps came from the living-room Malik looked up to see his Yami standing in the
doorway, a serious but angry look on his face. Malik's grip around the
porcelain pieces tighten and they shattered once more on the floor as he
watched the big cut on his palm.
This wouldn't be the only blood pouring
this evening. He couldn't take this anymore...
As soon as the thought crossed his mind he
felt the hands of his Yami in his hair as they dragged him into a standing
position.
A hard blow hit him in the stomach.

************

I
ever thought you wanted me dead. And if I'm right, you are very happy now, are
you not, Yami?
I
don't think you know this, because i never told you it. Even when I know you
hate me, I don't hate you. I never hated you. Sometimes I screamed that in your
face, while you were hurting me. But I never really meant it. Did you know? I
really liked you. I saw you as my brother, always. I guess that's all. Know
what? I still hope you don't hate me that much you told me you would. I still
hope you like me a bit, a really tiny bit. I would be happy to know.
Ryou
has told me once, that a Yami can survive when he owns his Item. I know you rested
in the Sennen Rod all the time till you got free, and now you own that Item. So
you won't disappear?! I wish you a good life, I really mean it. I want you to
be happy.
Because
you are still the other half of my soul.

I
guess, this is the time I have to say good bye. I hope it will be better were
I'm going, and I hope you will all be much happier without me bothering you.
I
will miss you all.

He folded the paper a few times and put it
into the envelop. If he laid it in front of the coffin, they would find it
later, wouldn't they? He lay down on the stone coffin and closed his eyes. The
bottles of alcohol still stood in the living-room at home. Isis would get angry
if she found them, very very angry. He wondered if she would be angry when she
would found him here. Would they even found him? There weren't much people
visiting his mother's tomb...
He wondered too, why he hadn't thought
about this earlier. Why had he kept all the pain for such a long time when this
was such an easy possibility. No more pain, no more worries, no more fear. And
he had nothing to lose.
Malik chuckled as he took the knife out of
his pocket. He didn't even know what was funny. Perhaps the fact that this was
the knife of his family. The knife which had marked every heir of his family
for hundreds of years. The knife that was given to them by the pharaoh. The
knife with what he was marked by his own father. And now, this Knife would end
it all. It would end his life.
And with him, everything would end.
Slowly he brought the knife to his wrist.
He bit his bottom lip. It hurt. He could feel the tears in his eyes, either
from pain and fear. But he couldn't cry. And he couldn't stop. Not now. It was
much too late to stop now. But he was so afraid of what lay before him. He
didn't want to know, he didn't want to know it any longer.
Tears were falling out of his eyes as he
dropped the knife. Both wrists were suddenly bleeding badly. He sniffled and
tried to calm himself. It was the best. It was the best thing he could have
done.
It was the best...
A weak smile crossed his lips as he thought
of his mother. So he was going to see her now, right?
He had always wanted to se her, to know
what she was like.
Yes, it was the best thing he could have
done.
Malik closed his eyes but the smile rested
on his face.
"Mother, I'm coming..."

//Author�s note//
Aww, sorry if there are still spelling
mistakes, but I already used a spell checker. I�m sorry for grammar mistakes
too. I�m still learning English at School, (I�m German) so if you see a few
mistakes and want to correct them and tell me. I�m always happy to learn more.
^^ The idea to this Story just flew into my mind some time ago. I think I like
what I have written. Please tell me what you think, I really want to know.
Review, yeah?
Sayonara! ~Kanika
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And now, he's gone...