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So Sick of Love Songs
By : Hideki LaShae
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh > Yaoi - Male/Male
Views: 2103 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0Disclaimer: I do not own YuGiOh!, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. - Chapter List
- 1
Disclaimer: All Yu-Gi-Oh! characters and
references belong to their respective owners. The songs, listed below, belong
to their respective performers and the companies that recorded them and were
used in this story with the best of intentions. Story elements © Hideki LaShae.
No money was gained in the writing of this story.So Sick of Love Songs
By
Hideki LaShae
Katsuya
Jounouchi, Jou to his friends, grabs the stereo remote control as he falls onto
the couch in a lying down position. He hits the power on to turn the radio to
his favorite station.<<
Here I go again, I promised myself I wouldn’t think of you today… >>Jou bites
his lip as he clicks the button to change to the next station. “I’m not
thinking of Seto! I’m not, I’m not, I’m not!”<<
And between now and then, until I see you again, I'll be loving you… Love, Me…
>>“I am not
thinking of Seto. I don’t want to think about Seto! I left him for a reason!”
exclaims Jou, “Not like he’d even understand the reason!” He pushes the button
to change channels again.<<
He's a cold-hearted snake… >>“Damn! You
got that right, Paula!” exclaims Jou, “Seto Kaiba is one cold-hearted snake!
Fucking bastard!” He hits the button again.<<
It’s the hardest thing I’ll ever have to do, to look you in the eye and tell
you I don’t love you… >>Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…“Sorry,
dudes, I’m not talking to anyone today!” exclaims Jou leaning back
further into the cushions.Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…(Gotta change ma answering machine)
(Now
that I’m alone)(Cuz
right now it says that we)(Can’t
come to the phone)Click.
<< Hey, there. This is a machine. You have reached the home of Jou,
>> comes Jou’s voice over the answering machine.Jou turns
his head to look at the answering machine as he waits for the second voice to
come over it.<<
I don’t see why I have to help you with this recording, Jou. You spend all your
time at my place, not the other way around, >> comes Seto’s distinct
tone.<<
You know that’s not the point! Now just read the card, Seto! You’re ruining my
message! >> comes Jou’s quiet whimper.<<
Fine, but only for you. I’ll read the stupid card. If Jou isn’t here, he’s
probably at my place, so you can call him there. If you don’t know my number,
you’re not worth his time and he doesn’t need to talk to you, >>
comes Seto’s voice again.<<
Seto! You’re not supposed to say that! Leave a message after the beep! I’ll get
back to you as soon as I can. If this is Shizuka calling, I love you, sis! If
you’re Yugi, I’ll see you at the game shop when I get off work! >><<
If you’re not with me that is. >> Beep.Jou closes
his eyes to prevent the tears that well in his eyes from falling.<<
It’s the hardest thing I’ll ever have to do, to turn around and walk away
pretending I don’t love you… >><<
Jou… come home, >> comes Seto’s voice as it’s recorded onto the
answering machine, << It’s Valentine’s Day, and I miss you. We can
work through this if only you’ll come back home. >>“I am home,
bastard!” exclaims Jou clicking the button on the remote to change radio
stations again, “I live here! It was only more convenient for you to have me
spend all my time there! That doesn’t mean it was my home!”<< I
will whisper sweet words and cry if you tell me the same. What I hear is just
the old, lame, occupied signal tone… >>“Bastard
Kaiba!” Jou clicks the button again.<<
How many lovers would stay? Just to put up with this shit day after day!
>>(And I know it makes no sense)
FLASHBACK
“Kneel
before your master, mutt…”“I’m not a
mutt, Kaiba!”“Then why
do you come here on your knees begging me for a bone?”“Fuck you!”
“That’s
exactly what I had in mind, mutt!”“Get the
hell away from me, moneybags! I ain’t that easy!”“What the
hell is your problem? I know for a fact that fighting with me turns you on!
You’re already hard and just waiting to be fucked senseless! So why do you keep
pushing me away whenever I try to get more intimate with you?”“So what if
I do get turned on by fighting with you? I’m not just going to fuck you because
you want me to! I won’t obey your every command like some wanton dog!”END FLASHBACK
Jou shakes
his head to clear it of the familiar memory and his hand pushes the button
again.<<
People think I’m hopeless, but to you I’m worthless… >>“I still
remember the first time you ever called me a worthless dog,” says Jou, “I
almost didn’t forgive you for that. It’s one thing to call me a dog, but I’ll
never allow you to call me worthless. But I guess it doesn’t matter now, since
we’re no longer together. Was I really worthless to you? Why did you spend so
much time on me then? Why did you keep trying to get closer to me? Why didn’t you
shove me away?”<<
You love the way I look at you while taking pleasure in the awful things you
put me through. You take away if I give in. My life, my pride is broken. You
like to think you’re never wrong… >>“Wow… if
that doesn’t spell Kaiba with a capital K!” exclaims Jou clicking the button a
few times for good measures, “He did take pleasure in making me feel like shit.
And then I would just look at him with pain filled eyes and a spark of hope
that maybe one day he might like me the way I like him. And he always has to be
right about everything. It’s infuriating!”<<
And for a moment the whole world revolved around one boy and one girl. >>“And for a
moment the whole world revolved around the two of us,” says Jou with a sigh.FLASHBACK
The scent
of roses fills Jou’s nostrils. “Nice flowers. Who are they for?”“Would you
believe me if I told you?” asks Seto brandishing the dozen multi-colored roses
in his hands.“Probably
not, but I’d like you to tell me anyway,” says Jou, “Is there some rich
girlfriend I should know about?”“You know
that I don’t have a girlfriend, Jou. And you know very well that these flowers
are for you,” says Seto, “Now would you like them in a vase or should I pluck
the petals for your bed?”Jou blushes
but he still smiles. “Ha, ha. A vase would be great!”(Cuz you walked out the door.)
“I think I
saw one in the kitchen,” says Seto heading into Jou’s kitchen with the roses in
hand.“Hey! When
were you ever in my kitchen?” exclaims Jou chasing after Seto.Seto
blushes slightly. “You do remember me bringing you soup a month ago when you
were stuck in bed with the flu, don’t you?”“Well,
yeah. You took very good care of me,” says Jou smiling.“I came in
here to make the soup for you. I didn’t want to bring the soup from home since
it might get cold,” says Seto, “I also did the dishes and a bit of cleaning
while I was in here.” He passes the roses to Jou while he opens a cabinet
looking for the vase. He pulls down the simple glass vase and takes it to the
sink to fill with water. “I had noticed this vase while I was working.”“You
cleaned?” asks Jou, “You? Seto Kaiba? Cleaned?”“Well…”
Seto blushes a bright red. He sets the filled vase on the counter beside the
sink and he takes the flowers from Jou, opening the wrapping and placing the
ends of the long stems into the water in the now filled sink.Jou steps
up right behind Seto and watches the brunet clip the roses and place them into
the vase. “You’re good at that.”“I want
them to last a long time for you,” says Seto meaningfully, “You’re well worth
it.”Jou grabs
Seto’s arm and spins him around. He tiptoes up to kiss the taller boy’s lips.
“Thank you!”END FLASHBACK
“Come to
think of it, I wonder if he has OCD? He’s definitely obsessive,” says Jou
nibbling on his lower lip in contemplation, “And he was compulsively cleaning
my place. Yep, that sounds like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder to me!”<<
They’re saying, “Mamma never loved her much” and, “Daddy never keeps in touch.
That’s why she shies away from human affection.” >>Jou’s eyes
widen. “Oh, Seto…”FLASHBACK
Jou slumps
his shoulders and sighs. “I just wish you’d open up to me, Kaiba.”Seto
remains silent and just looks at the defeated back of his boyfriend.“If we’re
even going to have a chance at making this relationship work,” says Jou turning
to face Seto and lock eyes with him, “Then you’re going to have to trust me
sometimes.”“I haven’t
trusted anyone other than Mokuba for a long time,” says Seto, “I’m not sure if
it’s that easy.”“It may not
be, but I’d appreciate the attempt.”Seto sits
down and turns his gaze from Jou’s face. “You know, Mokuba never knew our
mother.”Jou smiles
as he kneels on the floor in front of Seto and rests his head against the
brunet’s knee. He closes his eyes and relaxes. “Why not?”“She died
giving birth to him,” says Seto.“I’m
sorry…”“Don’t be.
She knew the risks. She knew having Mokuba would kill her, but it was her love
for our father that made her want to do everything she could to keep my little
brother. The doctors thought that Mokuba would have problems as well, that he
would be still born or have serious medical problems. It was so long ago that I
don’t remember what was wrong with my mother, but we were all thankful that
Mokuba turned out to be just fine,” says Seto, “I appreciate her sacrifice. I
don’t know what I would do today without Mokuba.”“What was
she like?” whispers Jou.(But it’s the only way I hear your voice)
(Anymore…)
“She was…
amazing,” says Seto, “She could peel an apple in one long spiral. And she had
such perfect hair. It was long and black like Mokuba’s, but no matter what kind
of day she had or how she had fixed it, it was always smooth and sleek and
perfectly in place. But what I remember most is her scent. There was a
different scent for every day of the week. On Monday, she smelled of lavender
soap and Chanel no. 5. Tuesday it was rose soap and matching essential oil. On Wednesday,
she smelled of peppermint hand lotion and a department store knock-off perfume.
She didn’t want to waste her best perfume on everyday use.”Jou dares a
glance up to see Seto in rapture with his eyes closed.“On
Thursday, she smelled of milk and honey. She used to bake cookies on Thursdays
so she always smelled so delicious,” says Seto, “Friday was a delicate scent of
forget-me-nots. Saturday, she was back to the lavender soap with a floral
perfume so she smelled like a bouquet of flowers. On Sunday, she smelled of
roast beef and freshly baked bread.”“What about
your father?” asks Jou.“He always
smelled of aftershave,” says Seto.Jou
chuckles.“He died
when Mokuba was still fairly young. There was a car accident,” says Seto moving
his hand to caress Jou’s hair like he was petting a puppy.“That’s
when you went to the orphanage, huh?”“Yes, and
then you know what happened.”“Yeah,
shit-faced ugly bastard!”“That’s the
most accurate thing I’ve ever heard him called!” exclaims Seto smiling.END FLASHBACK
Jou pushes
the button to change the channels again. His eyes well with tears as he hears
the soulful voice of Aaron Neville singing, << But don’t forget who’s
taking you home, and in whose arms you’re gonna be. So darlin’ save the last
dance for me… >>With
another click of the button, the radio changes stations. The song playing
forces Jou’s mind back in time to a special moment they shared together… the
night they danced together for the very first time.FLASHBACK
The gentle
music fills the air as Seto makes his way towards Jou.Jou smiles
at Seto. “Hey, Seto. Are you enjoying the party?”“It’s
nice,” says Seto, “Your friends seem to be really enjoying it. Are you?”“Yeah.” Jou
looks out to the dance floor where his friends are dancing together.“Would you
dance with me?” Seto blushes.Jou nods
his head and moves onto the dance floor with Seto. He wraps his arms around
Seto’s neck and rests his head on the slightly taller boy’s shoulder.Seto winds
his arms around Jou’s back and holds him tightly as the singer on the stage
starts in with the words to accompany the music.“Are you
ready maybe? Are you willing to run? Are you ready to let yourself drown? Are
you holding your breath? Are you ready or not?” sings the woman on the small stage
with the band.“You look
stunning tonight, Jou,” whispers Seto.“You look
stunning every night.”“Are you
ready maybe? Do you long to confess? Do you feel that you’re already known? Are
you sure of yourself? Would you lie if you’re not?” sings the woman, “You tire
me out. Don’t wanna let that happen. A secret screamed so loud. Why did you let
that happen?”Jou tilts
his head up to look into Seto’s eyes. He smiles and closes his eyes.“So put
your arms around me. You let me believe that you are someone else. Cause only
time can take you. So let me believe that I am someone else,” sings the woman.Seto
captures Jou’s lips in a kiss as they move slowly around the floor together.“Maybe, are
you ready to break? Do you think that I push you too far? Would you open
yourself? Are you reckless or not?” sings the woman, “You tire me out. Don’t
wanna let that happen. A secret screamed so loud. Why did you let that happen?”Jou smiles
as he pulls out of the kiss. He opens his eyes to stare into Seto’s blue eyes.
“I love it when you hold me like this.”“Remind me
never to let you go then,” says Seto smiling back at Jou.END FLASHBACK
<< So
put your arms around me. You let me believe that you are someone else. Cause
only time can take you. So let me believe that I am somewhere else. Let me
believe that I am somewhere else, >> sings the woman on the radio.A tear
slips from Jou’s eyes as he clicks the button on the remote again.<< I
won’t miss your arms around me holding me tight, and if you ever think about me
just know that I’ll be all right… >>(It’s ridiculous.)
“Yeah…
that’s right. I won’t miss Seto’s arms, and I will be all right,” says Jou
wrapping his arms around himself trying hard not to miss Seto’s arms. “He
didn’t need me anyway. I was just a convenience to him. He never loved me… I
just loved him… very, very much…”Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…“I thought
I said I wasn’t fucking talking to anyone today!” exclaims Jou standing
up abruptly and throwing the remote onto the couch cushions. He starts to make
his way into the kitchen.Ring,
ring… Ring, ring… Click. << Hey, there. This is a machine. You
have reached the home of Jou, >> comes Jou’s voice over the answering
machine. Seto’s voices comes over with, << I don’t see why I have to
help you with this recording, Jou. You spend all your time at my place, not the
other way around. >>Jou opens
the fridge and searches through it for the bottle of vodka he normally stores
in the door.<<
You know that’s not the point! Now just read the card, Seto! You’re ruining my
message! >> comes Jou’s quiet whimper.Not seeing
the vodka, Jou settles for pulling out an entire six-pack of sodas. If he can’t
get plastered at least he can get stoned on caffeine.<<
Fine, but only for you. I’ll read the stupid card. If Jou isn’t here, he’s
probably at my place, so you can call him there. If you don’t know my number,
you’re not worth his time and he doesn’t need to talk to you, >>
comes Seto’s voice again.Jou doesn’t
bother with grabbing anything to eat even though his stomach growls hungrily.
He steps back into the living room and sets the six-pack on the coffee table.<<
Seto! You’re not supposed to say that! Leave a message after the beep! I’ll get
back to you as soon as I can. If this is Shizuka calling, I love you, sis! If
you’re Yugi, I’ll see you at the game shop when I get off work! >><<
If you’re not with me that is. >> Beep.Jou cocks
his head to listen to the machine.<<
Jou… it’s Anzu, >> comes the female voice of one of his oldest
friends as the answering machine records her message, << I’m just
calling to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day! I’m sure you’re out with Kaiba
having a wonderful evening, but you know I don’t like calling him unless it’s
important and this message just isn’t 9-1-1 material! Give me a call tomorrow
or something, and we’ll get together to plan out gifts for White Day. I’m
thinking Seto would just love to have you dipped in dark chocolate for White
Day! >>“Fuck that!
Dammit! I knew I should have sent a group email telling everybody I dumped that
bastard!” exclaims Jou falling onto the couch again and grabbing a soda up. He
opens the can and quickly drinks half of it. “But then again, how many of them
would believe that I dumped the guy because I wouldn’t have sex with him? That
just sounds so stupid!”<<
He’s born to love, but we will teach him how to hate, and true love it is a
rock… >>(It’s been months for some reason I just)
(Can’t
get over us)Jou
frantically grabs the remote to the stereo and he clicks the button again.
“Bastard Kaiba! Why the fuck couldn’t he just love me?”<< I
never had a dream come true till the day that I found you. Even though I
pretend that I’ve moved on, you’ll always be my baby. I never found the words
to say, you’re the one I think about each day, and I know no matter where life
takes me to a part of me will always be with you. >>(And I'm stronger than this)
Jou wipes
his eyes to remove the tears from them before they have a chance to fall. “Why
does he always make me so weak?”A new song
starts to play on the radio and Jou looks at it with teary eyes.<<
When I was fourteen I was fallin’ fast for a blue-eyed girl in my homeroom
class. >>“It was
actually a blue-eyed boy in my homeroom class,” says Jou with a tiny smile.<<
Tryin’ to find the courage to ask her out was like tryin’ to get oil from a
waterspout. >>“I’d say it
was a great deal harder than that! Like trying to stay alive in the center of
the sun!” exclaims Jou.<<
What she would’ve said, I can’t say. I never did ask then she moved away. I
learned something from my blue-eyed girl: sink or swim, you gotta give it a
whirl… >>“I never
did ask him…” Jou shakes his head and clicks the button on the remote. “He
wouldn’t have possibly loved me! It wouldn’t have helped to ask him if he did!”<<
Lonely, I’m Mr. Lonely, I have nobody for my own. >>(Enough is enough.)
Jou hits
the power button on the radio, but it only changes stations again. He looks at
the remote and shakes it a few times to see if anything inside is rattling.
When he doesn’t hear anything, he pushes the power button again only to change
radio stations.<<
Love has got me down. A tear just hit the ground. >>Jou just
sits there for a minute crying before he downs the rest of his soda and hits
the button to change the station a few more times. He opens another soda and
pours it down his throat.<<
Love and other moments are just chemical reactions in your brain… >>FLASHBACK
“Guess
who?” whispers Jou into Seto’s ear as he covers his boyfriend’s eyes with his
hands.“Stop this
foolishness, Jou,” says Seto, “I have work to do.”“But you
promised you’d take off early and take me to the amusement park!” whines Jou.“I know,
and I’m sorry, but I have to finish reviewing this contract,” says Seto with a
sigh.“Fine. I’ll
be in the kitchen pigging out on ice cream… if you want to find me that is,”
says Jou sulking away to the kitchen and pulling out a package of cheap ice
cream. He smiles at the fact that Seto knows him well enough to get the type of
ice cream that he likes, even though Seto himself only eats the most expensive
brand on the market, a brand so rich any flavor makes Jou sick just by looking
at it. He sits down with his ice cream container and a spoon and slowly opens
the cardboard packaging. He’s barely eaten a spoonful before warm hands cover
his eyes.“Guess
who?” comes the whisper into his ear.“Hey,
Mokuba…”“Wrong
guess.”“Yugi, what
are you doing in Seto’s house without ringing the doorbell first? You know how
much he hates that!” exclaims Jou.“Wrong
guess.”“Fuck it,
Mai! I told you we couldn’t sleep with each other here! We have to do it at
your apartment!”“What?”
exclaims Seto spinning Jou’s chair around and staring at the mischievous eyes.“Oh, Seto!
It’s you!” exclaims Jou smiling, “Just kidding about Yugi coming into your
house without ringing the doorbell. He’s always so traditional about calling
ahead and ringing when he gets here!”“What about
Mai? Are you sleeping with her?” asks Seto.“What do
you think?”“I don’t
think you have the time to be messing around with her when you spend all day
working, and all evening with me,” says Seto, “Tell me that Mai thing was a
joke.”“It was a
joke. You know I’m still a virgin,” says Jou.“Not for my
lack of trying to remedy that,” says Seto leaning down to kiss Jou.Jou moans
into the kiss, but he pulls away too soon. “I’m sorry, Seto. I’m not ready
yet.”“I know,
and I understand,” says Seto.“That’s one
of the things I love about you, Seto,” says Jou snuggling into the blue-eyed
boy.(No more walking ‘round with ma head down.)
“Love?”
asks Seto swallowing hard.“Yeah.
Love,” says Jou, “Don’t you believe in love, Seto?”“Love is
just a chemical reaction…”“Yeah.
Figured you’d say as much,” says Jou, “But I guess it really doesn’t matter all
that much. I believe in love enough for the both of us, and I do. I love you,
Seto.”Seto pulls
Jou into a warm embrace and passionate kiss. “I care for you as well.”END FLASHBACK
“Care for
you? Care for you? Is that as good as I fucking deserve? I deserve to be loved
gods-dammit! I deserve to be loved!” Jou buries his face into a throw
pillow and lets his tears stain the soft floral fabric. His mind blocks all
sound except for the wails and sobs emitted from his own throat. He cries until
his eyes are red and puffy, then he sits up slowly and wipes them dry with the
bottom of his t-shirt.(I’m so over being blue)
(Crying
over you)“I love
you, Seto. I miss you…”<<
But part of you will never ever go away. Your heart will stay. >>Jou grabs
the remote and presses the channel button again to change the stations.
<< I… >> Press button. << Love… >> Press button.
<< You… >> Again. << Baby… >> Button. << I…
>> Again. << Need… >> Again. << You… >> Change
channels yet again. << So… >>“What the
hell is this? Valentine’s Day?” screams Jou at the top of his lungs. He calms
down after a moment. “Oh, wait. It is. That’s why all the stations are playing
love songs! Fuck! There’s got to be one that’s not playing mushy stuff!”Jou hits
the button a few more times to change the channels.<< I
need more than you’re givin’ me. Skin deep. Get down to the bone. Heart and
soul, I’ve got to have it all. It’s got to be special. >>“Fucking
hell!”(And I’m so sick of love songs)
(So
tired of tears)Jou presses
the button again and gets up from the couch to head into the kitchen again. He
once again ignores his hunger for food and starts digging in the cabinets for
anything stronger than soda. “A good bottle of whiskey would do me a world of
good right now!”After
finding nothing stronger than a mostly eaten box of bourbon cherry cordials
left over from Christmas, Jou meanders back into the living room, trying to
suck the bourbon from the treat without having to eat the cherry and the
chocolate. He finally starts to chew it up as he sits down and opens another
soda to drink.<<
Baby ain’t it somethin’ how we lasted this long. You and me provin’ everyone
wrong. Don’t think we’ll ever get our differences patched. Don’t really matter
cause we’re perfectly matched. >>“Yeah,
Paula. I thought so too. Seto and I were opposites sometimes, but there were so
many times when we were perfect for each other. We didn’t always get along, but
when we fought, we always had the best make-out sessions. Our differences
helped us so many times… like when his car broke down in my neighborhood before
our date.”FLASHBACK
Seto pulls
up in front of Jou’s more or less in tact home. He climbs out after turning the
engine off.Jou runs
out of his house and straight into Seto’s arms. He smiles and gives his
boyfriend a quick kiss on the lips. “Can we go now?”“Enthusiastic?”
Jou nods.
“Let’s go,”
says Seto turning around with Jou in his arms and guiding his blond boyfriend
towards his vehicle. He helps Jou into the passenger seat before moving around
to the driver’s seat and climbing in. He tries to start the engine and curses
when it doesn’t start.“Why isn’t
the car running?” asks Jou slowly.“Fuck!”
Seto slams his fist into the steering wheel. “I don’t know. It was in the shop
for a tune-up just this morning.”“Well… pop
the hood and let me take a look. I know a little bit about auto mechanics,”
says Jou.“Okay,”
says Seto pulling the handle to pop the hood.Jou climbs
from the vehicle quickly and lifts the hood. After a few moments he calls, “Try
it now!”Seto turns
the key and the engine roars to life. He watches as Jou closes the hood and
climbs back into the car. “What did you do?”“Some
mechanics you just don’t trust. They wanted you to have problems so you’d have
to call them to fix it again and pay them big bucks!” exclaims Jou, “But you’re
as good as new now! Can we go?”“I think we
can,” says Seto throwing the car into gear and driving off. “By the way, thanks
for your help with the car.”“No
problem, Seto,” says Jou scooting a little closer to him.END FLASHBACK
(So done with wishing)
(You
were still here)“Seto. I
miss you.”<< A
crowded room. Friends with tired eyes. I’m hiding from you and your soul of
ice. My god I thought you were someone to rely on. Me? I guess I was a shoulder
to cry on. A face on a lover with a fire in his heart. A man under cover but
you tore me apart. >>Jou wipes
the tears from his eyes and gets up for a quick run to the bathroom. He comes
out minutes later to hear, << Oh, Joey, if you’re hurtin’, so am I.
>>“I am
hurting. I hurt because love is a two way street, and Seto doesn’t drive! I’m
so cold without him here to hold me, but if he doesn’t love me, I can’t be with
him anymore.” Jou hits the button to change channels on the radio.<<
And I see you in a different light, your hair falling down with love in your
eyes. In my mind, you’re a beautiful sight. I see you in a different light,
just the way I saw you last night… >>FLASHBACK
Jou opens
his eyes to see Seto leaning over him in the bed they shared that night. He
smiles at the mussed up hair and sleep-filled blue eyes. “Beautiful…”“Yes, you
are,” whispers Seto moving to kiss Jou.“I mean
you,” mumbles Jou before his lips are sealed with the kiss.“I know what
you meant,” whispers Seto after pulling out of their kiss, “But you are much
more beautiful than I!”Jou blushes
at the compliment. He runs his hand through the messy russet locks and watches
the way the sunlight shifting in through the window curtains highlights his
boyfriend. “How many people have seen you like this?”“None that
matter to me other than you,” says Seto.“Did you
love any of them?” asks Jou.“I don’t
love.”“I know,
but I can always hope that one day you might love me,” says Jou, “I’d like to
see love shining in your eyes just once before I die.”“You are
not dying on me!” exclaims Seto grabbing Jou and kissing him passionately.“Not today.
Not for a long time,” says Jou.END FLASHBACK
Jou sighs.
“How many people have actually had sex with him? How many people has his body
loved even if his heart hasn’t loved them in return? Why couldn’t I have been
the one person his heart chose to love?”(Said I’m so sick of love songs)
<<
You were my first love, you were my true love from the first kisses to the very
last rose from the bottom of my broken heart… >>“Our first
kiss… my first kiss ever…”FLASHBACK
Jou walks
down the path, not even paying attention to where he’s going. He runs into a
warm body and knocks them both to the ground. “Dammit! Sorry! Are you okay?”“Get the
fuck off me, mutt!”“Fuck,
Kaiba! What the hell are you doing knocking me down?” shouts Jou pushing
himself off the brunet and standing up.“Knocking
you down? You’re the one who knocked me down, mongrel!” exclaims Seto getting
up and dusting his clothing off, “But I suppose I can’t expect a weak little
dog like you to actually see where you’re going. Blindness must run in the
family.”“Fuck off,
you bastard!” screams Jou swinging his fist at Seto.Seto dodges
the swing and sends his own fist into Jou’s gut.Jou gasps
and mimics the attack, sending his own fist into Seto’s stomach.Seto
retaliates with a well-placed fist to Jou’s jaw.Fists,
elbows, and kicks fly for several long tense moments before Jou purposely kicks
Seto’s feet out from under him.Seto falls
into Jou in an attempt to force the blond to fall with him.Both boys
fall to the ground in a heap of tangled limbs.“Mutt!”
“Bastard!”
Seto and
Jou lie tangled together breathing heavily until Jou shifts uncomfortably and
rubs his erection against Seto’s thigh.“Mutt, do
you have a pencil in your pocket?” asks Seto blushing a very light pink.Jou’s eyes
widen, and his face turns red. “No.”“So you’re
happy to see me,” says Seto looking into Jou’s brown eyes.“Hell no!”
exclaims Jou trying to roll off Seto, but Seto grabs him by the shoulder with
one hand and the waist with the other and pulls him back into their previous
position.“I never
told you to move,” whispers Seto before locking his lips with Jou’s.Jou tenses
as he stares into the blue eyes up close and personal, but his body relaxes
when Seto moves his hand from the shoulder up to the side of the blond’s face.
His eyes slide closed, and he starts to kiss back and opens his mouth willingly
for the tongue that begs entrance.Seto moves
his tongue around within Jou’s mouth as he presses his body tighter against the
other boy’s, letting his own erection be felt.Jou pants
as they pull away from the kiss. He blushes even more as he opens his eyes to
see Seto still staring at him. “Did you close your eyes at all?”“No,”
whispers Seto. He rubs his erection against Jou’s.“Kaiba, do
you have a pencil in your pocket?”“No… I’m
happy to see you,” whispers Seto, “Fighting with you has always been enjoyable
for me. I think I like this too though.” He kisses Jou again; once again
keeping his eyes open so he can watch Jou as they kiss.(So sad and slow)
Jou closes
his eyes on instinct and rolls them over to press Seto’s shoulders into the
ground as he tries to take over control of their kiss. He moans as Seto
relinquishes control for a moment before rolling them both over again and
taking back command of their passionate kiss.Seto
spreads his body out completely over Jou’s when he stops their kiss for a
moment to breathe deeply.Jou gazes
up at Seto with half-lidded eyes. “What are we doing?”“Making
out,” whispers Seto kissing one of Jou’s eyelids.“Why?”
whispers Jou, “I know it feels good, but why?”“Because we
want to?” replies Seto raising an eyebrow.“Yeah,
great reason.” Jou smiles.“Should I
kiss you again?”“Fuck
yeah!”Seto seals
their lips together again and forces his tongue into Jou’s mouth.Jou pulls
away from the kiss breathless and starts kissing Seto’s face and neck as the
brunet above him starts to grind their lower bodies together in a sensual
manner.Seto barely
hears the whispered word “Harder” come from Jou’s throat as the blond kisses
his neck over his pulse point. He forces his hips harder against the other’s as
he grinds their sexually frustrated bodies as one.Jou jerks
his hips up as he releases in his pants. He gazes at Seto lustfully.Seto’s body
shudders as it follows the other’s lead.“I’m gay,”
whispers Jou.“I know
that now,” whispers Seto in return, “So am I.”“I know
that now.”Seto places
a chaste kiss on Jou’s lips. “Should I pick you up tomorrow night at eight?”Jou
blushes. “For a date?”“For a new
start.” Seto’s lips turn up in a slight smile. “And, yes, a date.”“Could you
make it seven-thirty?”“Done!”
Seto rolls off Jou and gets up. He holds out his hand in offering to Jou.Jou sits up
before taking the hand to help himself up. He smiles. His cheeks redden as he
says, “See you tomorrow.”END FLASHBACK
(So why can’t I turn off the radio?)
Jou hits
the power button on the remote and the channel changes again.<<
Bobby Womack’s on the radio saying to me, “If you think you’re lonely now…”
>>“Our first
kiss was the fourteenth. Our first date on the fifteenth of July,” mumbles Jou,
“I guess we won’t be celebrating that anniversary. Have we actually been
together over a year without having sex? How could he stand to be around me
that long? How could I let it go on for that long without forcing him to tell
me he loves me so that we could just fuck like a normal couple?”(Gotta fix that calendar I had)
(That’s
marked July 15th)(Cuz
since there’s no more you)(There’s
no more anniversary)“I needed
Seto to tell me he loved me before I would be able to give myself to him. I’ve
always believed you should love the person you bed with,” says Jou with a sigh,
“Our first year anniversary was so great. Everybody was there at our
celebratory party. Professor Hawkins and Grandpa Motou were talking up a storm
about old times and Egypt, and other similar things. Isis Ishtar and her
fiancé, Shadi, joined them to talk about archaeology. Pegasus Crawford and his
lackey, Croquet, crashed the party, but they didn’t cause any trouble. They
just drank all the wine and left. Mai Kujaku and Ryuji Otogi were stuck in a
corner making out the entire night. That was the night Mokuba and Shizuka
shared their first kiss and started going out. It was their unofficial first
date. So we would have shared an anniversary this year if I were still with
Seto. Seto and I were tolerable hosts, I guess. We met with everybody and
gossiped a little, but we spent our share of time under a kissing fern too. And
of course I couldn’t help but spend a great deal of the night walking around
with a plate from the buffet and munching as we talked to our friends. I
remember seeing Bandit Keith and Ghost there for a few minutes, but I think
security took care of them. Hanasaki and Insector Haga were getting rather
friendly. I saw them eating and talking together, and they shared a kiss, but
it was pretty innocent by the looks of it. Of course Malik Ishtar and Ryou
Bakura were anything but innocent. About midnight, they took their affections
to the buffet table and were having sex on top of it. Most everyone ran home
about then. I think Anzu left with Ryouta Kajiki. I wonder if they were going
home to have sex, but then again, I don’t want to know about Anzu’s sex life!
Yugi proposed to Rebecca Hawkins during the festivities, so we turned it into
an engagement party too once she said yes. Honda and Miho left the party early,
probably wanting to get their real date underway since the party was too
dull and boring for them, or at least that’s why Honda told me they left when
he called the next day. Espa, Rishid, and Dinosaur got into quite the Duel
Monsters confrontation over the punch bowl too. I wonder if that red ever came
out of Espa’s hair.”(I’m so fed up with my thoughts of you)
(And
your memories)<<
Honey, listen to me. Your love is all I need. You should know that I don’t need
nothin’ that money can buy… >>Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…Jou downs
the last of his soda cans in rapid succession.Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…“What the
fuck is up with everyone calling?” Jou stuffs one of the chocolate cherries
into his mouth and chews it up quickly wishing it had more bourbon and less of
everything else.Click.
<< Hey, there. This is a machine. You have reached the home of
Jou. I don’t see why I have to help you with this recording, Jou. You spend all
your time at my place, not the other way around. You know that’s not the point!
Now just read the card, Seto! You’re ruining my message! Fine, but only for
you. I’ll read the stupid card. If Jou isn’t here, he’s probably at my place,
so you can call him there. If you don’t know my number, you’re not worth his
time and he doesn’t need to talk to you. Seto! You’re not supposed to say that!
Leave a message after the beep! I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. If this
is Shizuka calling, I love you, sis! If you’re Yugi, I’ll see you at the game
shop when I get off work! If you’re not with me that is. >> Beep.<<
Jou. It’s Yugi. I got a visit from Kaiba a few minutes ago. I thought I should
call you. We had a nice long conversation about you, >> comes Yugi’s
sweet voice through the answering machine, << I’m surprised that you
didn’t tell me. Why did you two break up? I thought you had a lasting
relationship! You seemed so much in love and so perfect for each other…>>
Yugi sighs. << I know that you like your privacy, but everyone thought
you two were sleeping together. Kaiba said you’d never had sex, that you
had always denied him. That doesn’t sound like you, but I guess I’ve never been
in that type of relationship with you to tell. If you’re there please pick up.
I don’t want to tell you everything over the answering machine! … Well, I guess
you’re not home. So let’s see… Kaiba came over and asked me for my help. He
said you two had a fight and that you broke up with him. He wanted my advice on
what was wrong and how he could apologize to you. So he explained your
relationship and how you’ve never had sex. I told him about how you always
talked about saving yourself for true love. I think he left sad. I think he
believed you didn’t love him. >>“Make a
long story short!”<<
I think he may be coming towards you to apologize. So, heads up if you’re home!
See you tomorrow. >>“Bye,
Yugi!” exclaims Jou, “See you tomorrow.”<<
Baby don’t you know that I love you, and I’d never put nobody above you. He
could promise the moon and the stars above. Even if he promised me the world,
just remember I’m forever your girl… >>Jou’s
shoulders slump. “Why would Seto come here for me? He didn’t love me. Yes, I
loved him, and I’ll probably die still loving him, but… Love takes two.”(And now every song reminds me)
(Of
what used to be)<<
Here we go. We’re at the beginning. We haven’t fucked yet, but my head’s
spinning. Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you… >>“I didn’t
want sex between us to be just fucking. I wanted it to be making love. But he never
said he loved me, so we never had sex… I sorta wish that I would have let him,
just once, so I’d know how it felt to be loved by him… but it wouldn’t have
been love.” Jou heads into the bathroom and slams the door behind him. He
relieves himself in the toilet while his mind replays some of his exploratory
excursions in the bathroom with Seto. He washes his hand and sticks his head in
the sink to let the cold water wash over it and clear away his thoughts of his
love. He grabs a towel to dry his hair as he walks back into the living room.
He flops down on his back on the sofa as he ruffles his hair with the towel.<<
Have you finally found the one you’ve given your heart to only to find that one
won’t give their heart to you? >>“I have,
Brandy. And it hurts,” whispers Jou as he digs the remote out from beneath his
back where it ended up when he fell on the couch.(That’s the reason)
(I’m
so sick of love songs)Jou presses
the power button and groans as the channel changes again.<< I
don’t need you anymore. >>“That’s
right! I don’t need Seto!”<< I
don’t want to be ignored. >>“Exactly! I
need more that that! I deserve more than that!”<< I
don’t need one more day of you wasting me away with no apologies. Don’t stay.
>>Tears fill
Jou’s eyes again.<<
Forget our memories. >>Jou closes
his eyes and lets the tears fall down his cheeks. “I can’t just forget the best
time of my life.”<<
Forget our possibilities. >>“I wanted
to marry him…”(So tired of tears)
“He’s not
worth crying over!” cries Jou as more tears roll from his eyes. He wipes his
tears away and pushes the change channel button several more times.<< I
watch you sleepin’, your body touchin’ me. There’s no doubt about it, this is
where I want to be. You know it’s so ironic, I had to lose to win… >>“I wish I
could win his love, even if I had to lose a thousand times for just one
victory.” Jou sighs. “Damn you, Seto Kaiba! Damn you to all the hells!”A light
tapping on the door distracts Jou from any more cursing that he might place
upon Seto. He gets up from the couch and wipes his eyes as he moves to the
door, already knowing who stands on the other side. He unlocks the door and
lets it swing open. He smiles weakly. “Hi, Ms. Stone.”“Jou? Are
you crying?” asks the brown haired twenty-one year old woman standing in the
hall with a towel-covered plate in her hands.“Yeah… I
broke up with Seto,” whispers Jou.“Why? I
thought you loved him!” Silver-gray eyes look at Jou with concern.“I do, Ms.
Stone! He doesn’t love me!”Ms. Stone
uncovers the plate in her hands. “Here. Eat a cookie. It will make you feel
better.”Jou
sniffles as he takes a cookie and starts to eat it. He gains strength from the
sweet confection and the chocolate actually does make his heart swell with happiness
for a moment.“Would you
like to talk about it?” asks Ms. Stone.“No…
Besides, I’m sure you have plans with your boyfriend that you got to make it
to,” says Jou.“Yes, about
that. I got into a bit of a mess in the kitchen and I made too much sweets for
Valentine’s Day, and since I know how much you love food, I was hoping you
could take care of the rest of it for me?” Ms. Stone flashes Jou a pleading
smile.“Won’t your
boyfriend mind you giving me cookies?”“Oh, no. He
knows I love you more than him anyway!”Jou lets a
small smile grace his lips when he sees the older woman wink at him. “I’ll take
them. Tell Mr. McCoy that he’d better treat you right or I’ll kick his ass!”“Oh, he
does, but I’ll tell him anyway,” says Ms. Stone before giving Jou a quick kiss
to his cheek and the now re-covered up plate, “If you think it will help, eat
it all tonight. I could make you more later.”“Thank
you,” says Jou before watching Ms. Stone turn away and head into her apartment
down the hall. He reenters his apartment and closes the door, locking it firmly
behind him. He starts to eat a fudge bar as he remembers moving from his
father’s old house into this comfortable apartment building with thanks from
Seto for finding it. He places the plate on the coffee table and lies down on
the couch again. He sighs and closes his eyes.<<
Love everything about the way you’re loving me. The way you lay your head upon
my shoulder when you sleep, and I love to kiss you in the rain. I love
everything you do, oh I do… >>FLASHBACK
Seto slips
into the bed beside Jou and quickly kisses the blond’s lips. “Would you like to
have a little fun tonight?”“I love
you, Seto,” whispers Jou. Inside he wishes for the words to be repeated back at
him.“Good,”
whispers Seto slipping a hand down to the waist of Jou’s boxers.“I’m just
not ready.”Both Seto
and Jou release a sigh of frustration and disappointment.Seto kisses
Jou’s lips again. “Go to sleep then. Pleasant dreams.”“Same to
you,” says Jou as they cuddle together.Seto rests
his head upon Jou’s shoulder, listening to the heartbeat, and he closes his
eyes to fall asleep.Jou strokes
Seto’s hair for a moment before closing his own eyes and going to sleep.END FLASHBACK
(So done with wishing)
(You
were still here)Jou finds
the remote again and suddenly remembers the ‘search for station’ button, which
will only keep the radio on a station for a few short moments. He grins
wickedly as he pushes the button.<<
There’s no comfort in the truth. Pain is all you’ll find… >>“It’s
amazing how well these old guys know their shit,” mumbles Jou, “Only pain comes
from knowing that Seto doesn’t love me. Or could it be possible that I don’t
know that he loves me?” He sighs. “No, if he loved me at all, he would have
told me.”<<
Stay the night. I’d like to spend it with you. Stay the night. Why don’t we
call it a day? >>“Since we
started dating I spent half my nights with Seto, but we never had sex. And he
never pushed me. I was the one who pushed him away.”<<
Show me the meaning of being lonely. So many words for the broken heart. It’s
hard to see in a crimson love. >>“I hate
this feeling of loneliness. I should have just accepted what I had and settled
for it! Seto… I miss you.”<<
One of us is lonely. One of us is only waiting for a call. Sorry for herself,
feeling stupid feeling small, wishing she had never left at all. >>Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…“Fuck!”
exclaims Jou jumping, “Damn phone scared me half to death. Was that song an
omen? Is that Seto? I’m still not answering it!”Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…Click.
<< Hey, there. This is a machine. You have reached the home of Jou,
>> comes Jou’s voice over the answering machine.<<
I don’t see why I have to help you with this recording, Jou. You spend all your
time at my place, not the other way around, >> comes Seto’s distinct
tone.<<
You know that’s not the point! Now just read the card, Seto! You’re ruining my
message! Fine, but only for you. I’ll read the stupid card. If Jou isn’t here,
he’s probably at my place, so you can call him there. If you don’t know my
number, you’re not worth his time and he doesn’t need to talk to you. Seto!
You’re not supposed to say that! Leave a message after the beep! I’ll get back
to you as soon as I can. If this is Shizuka calling, I love you, sis! If you’re
Yugi, I’ll see you at the game shop when I get off work! If you’re not with me
that is. >> Beep.<<
Hey, big brother… it’s Shizuka, >> comes the female voice of his
little sister, << I’m getting ready for my date with Mokuba, but I just
wanted to call to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day! I wasn’t sure if you and
Seto would be at your place or his tonight. I thought you might like a little
bit of privacy at your apartment. I have your present with me, and since you’re
not there, I guess I’ll be giving it to you when I’m over at Seto’s place. So I
guess me leaving a message on this machine is kinda pointless, but you’ll have
a nice message from me when you finally do come home, so you’ll know I was
thinking of you! Have a good holiday, and try not to scream too loud when you
give it to Seto! >>“I should
have answered that one. Maybe sometime I’ll get caller I.D. Yeah. That would be
a great idea, and I could use that to screen my phone calls!” exclaims Jou
grinning slightly at the thought, “But why should I pay for something I’m never
around to use?”<<
For once in your life, be a man. Just tell me the words, cause I know that you
can. Don’t leave me with scars that no one can heal. For once in your life, be
a man… >>“That’s
right. I’m no longer with Seto, so I’ll be home more. Maybe I should get caller
I.D. then.”(Said I’m so sick of love songs)
(So
sad and slow)Jou grabs
the box of bourbon chocolates and starts to eat them, one by one in rapid
succession.<< I
believe you don’t know what you’ve got until you say goodbye… >>Jou sighs
but continues to gorge himself on the fine chocolate. “If there’s one thing I
hate in life, it’s when art reflects reality.”<< I
didn’t mean to fall in love with you. >>“Or is it
when reality reflects art? Whatever, better make it two things I hate!”<<
And baby there’s a name for what you put me through. It isn’t love, it’s
robbery. >>“Hell,
yeah! You go, boys!”<<
I’m sleeping with the ghost of you and me. >>“Sleep
sounds good about now. A good long sleep so I wake up dead…”<<
Lay a whisper on my pillow, leave the winter on the ground. I wake up lonely,
there’s air of silence in the bedroom and all around. >>Jou throws
his empty box of chocolates across the room. “I guess I’ll be waking up lonely
for a while now. I should probably find some rebound skank… just to warm the
bed at night and hold me. But there will be no sex involved. If I didn’t give
it to Seto when I loved him, I sure as heck ain’t giving it to someone else
when I don’t.”<<
Touch me now, I close my eyes and dream away. It must have been love but it’s
over now. It must have been good but I lost it somehow. >>Jou buries
his face in the pillow and curls up in a ball on the couch. He sobs
uncontrollably. “I miss him. I really, really miss him.”<<
You can call me when you want me, if you need a friend you got me. I’ll be your
everything, fulfill your every dream… >>Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…“Go away!”
Ring,
ring… Ring, ring…Click.
<< Hey, there. This is a machine. You have reached the home of Jou. I
don’t see why I have to help you with this recording, Jou. You spend all your
time at my place, not the other way around. You know that’s not the point! Now
just read the card, Seto! You’re ruining my message! Fine, but only for you.
I’ll read the stupid card. If Jou isn’t here, he’s probably at my place, so you
can call him there. If you don’t know my number, you’re not worth his time and
he doesn’t need to talk to you. Seto! You’re not supposed to say that! Leave a
message after the beep! I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. If this is
Shizuka calling, I love you, sis! If you’re Yugi, I’ll see you at the game shop
when I get off work! If you’re not with me that is. >> Beep.<<
Jou, I miss you, >> comes Seto’s voice, << I’m getting
lonely without you around. Please, come home! I miss you so much I even went to
Yugi for help. You know how much I hate to admit any problems to him, even if I
am starting to allow him more into our joint life. He asked me all sorts of questions
about what went wrong in our relationship. He didn’t even know that we had a
big fight and you left. So I told him, everything. I told him about our sex
life! Doesn’t that tell you how much I care for you… that I would talk to my
rival about our sex life? >>“Yeah, I
suppose it does say something, but not what I need to hear. I need to hear the
three words of commitment. I need to hear ‘I love you’ come from your lips,
Seto,” says Jou sitting up straight.<<
Jou… Yugi asked me when was the last time I told you that I love you. He
thought that I might not have said it enough, >> says Seto through
the answering machine.“You mean
at all!”<<
That’s ridiculous! You know my feelings for you. It’s Valentine’s Day, Jou.
Come back home. >>“No. I’m
not going back to you!” exclaims Jou, “You don’t deserve my love!”(So why can’t I turn off the radio?)
<<
She’s just tired of being Cinderella. She can’t live that way no more. Needs a
little affection, a little understanding. Better be careful cause the next time
she comes through my door, she won’t be Cinderella no more. A teardrop trembles
on her face where that smile always was… >>“I can’t
live this way anymore, being treated as second-rate, like a lost puppy, like an
unloved lover…”<<
Why is it that when I just want to tell someone I really love how much I love
him, I start crying? >>(Oh, leave me alone)
(Leave
me alone. Stupid love song)<< If
there’s a prize for rotten judgment, I guess I’ve already won that. No man is
worth the aggravation. That’s ancient history, been there done that… >>“Bastard.
If only I wasn’t gay, I wouldn’t have ever been attracted to him, and I never
would have gone through all this heartache!” exclaims Jou, “I curse the day I
found I was gay! I curse the day Seto first kissed me! And most importantly, I
curse the day I fell in love with him!”<< I
don’t want to run away but I can’t take it, I don’t understand. If I’m not made
for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? Is there any way that I can
stay in your arms? If I don’t need you then why am I crying on my bed? If I
don’t need you then why does your name resound in my head? If you’re not for me
then why does this distance maim my life? If you’re not for me then why do I
dream of you as my wife? >>(Hey, don’t make me think about her smile)
(Or
having my first child)FLASHBACK
“I’m
telling you, Yug’! This is it for me! This is true love.”Yugi simply
smiles. “Feels good, doesn’t it?”“Yeah! It
feels great! I’d like to spend the rest of my life with him. I’m thinking of
asking him to marry me!”“Really?”
Yugi’s eyes widen. “Do you have a ring?”“Not yet.
I’m working on weaseling the financing out of Mokuba’s pocket! He’s Seto Kaiba,
you know, and people will expect him to have an extravagant ring for his
wedding/engagement thing. Mokuba and I went shopping for rings, and we’re
seriously thinking about this platinum ring with three diamonds,” says Jou, “I
have a bunch of money saved up from my paper route, but it’s not enough. I’m
trying to convince Mokuba to lend me the money. He’s still thinking about it. I
think he’s trying to find out from Seto if he wants to marry me.”“Don’t you
think he does?”“Well… I
think so…”“But?”
“He might
want custom rings.”Yugi
laughs.END FLASHBACK
“Well, I
guess I don’t need to worry about the cost of the ring anymore!”<< I
think about you… >>“Yeah. I’ve
been doing nothing else since I broke up with him…” Jou gets up from the couch
and walks over to the window. He gazes out at the tallest building in sight, the
Kaiba Corp building.<<
Waiting for your change of heart… >>For a
moment, as Jou watches the lights of the Kaiba Corp, his eyes catch a glimpse
of a light go off where he knows Seto’s office to be, but once he blinks again,
he realizes that it wasn’t just Seto’s office plunged in darkness, it was half
the building as the other half sent out a Valentine’s message to Domino in the
form of red-light windows shaping a heart. “Seto? What a wonderful gesture for
the people. Couldn’t do that for me though!”<<
When you walk away you don’t hear me say, ‘Please, oh baby, don’t go’… >>Jou turns
away from the lights of the Kaiba Corp building, and he leans against the
window. “He didn’t even ask me not to go…”(Then lettin’ go)
(Turning
off the radio)Jou moves
over to the stereo and pushes a random button.<< I
don’t wanna live without your love. I don’t wanna face the night alone. I could
never make it through my life if I had to make it on my own. I don’t wanna love
nobody else. I don’t wanna find somebody new. I don’t wanna live without your
love. I just wanna live my life with you… >>Jou’s
stomach growls loudly and he moves back over to the couch to grab a cookie. He
takes a small bite. “If Ms. Stone wasn’t so much older than me, and already
taken, and a girl, I would so be asking her to marry me!”<<
Yes, there was a time I thought she had it all. She meant the world to me, back
when the world was small. That was a river; this is the ocean. That never
carried this much emotion. Nothing compares to this deep devotion. That was a
river; this is the ocean. >>“Damn! That
girl can cook!” exclaims Jou, “But I only like her. It was never, and probably
could never be, love. Not like what I feel for Seto!” He sighs.<<
And I can’t fight this feeling anymore. I’ve forgotten what I started fighting
for. >>Jou moves
over to his phone and lifts the handset. He presses the speed dial combination
that will send his call to the Kaiba Mansion. He presses the handset to his
ear. Ring, ring…“What the
hell am I doing?” Jou ends the call and sets the receiver down, “He’s the one
who should be calling me. But he has. I just haven’t answered.”<<
We’ve both traveled down that road, where, in the name of love, anything goes.
So don’t say that word, not the one, we both heard it too much. You may think
you do, but you don’t. It’s just the fear of being alone… >>“Seto…”
<<
Somewhere out there is somebody… >>Ring,
ring…Jou jumps
and hits the talk button on his phone before lifting it to his ear. “Hey.”<<
Is Kira there? >> A young girl giggles.“Sorry.
Wrong number,” says Jou before hanging up. He drops the phone back into its
charger and moves to the chair closest to the television, where he sits down
with a sigh. “There’s no Kira here. There’s no Seto here either. And to tell
you all the truth, people who call me here, I don’t think there’s a Katsuya
Jounouchi here either. I don’t know where he would be if not here, but I don’t
think he’s here.”<< I
think I dreamed you into life. I knew I loved you before I met you… >>(Cause I’m so sick of love songs)
(So
tired of tears)(So
done with wishing)(You
were still here)“There
always was something there.”FLASHBACK
Jou takes
one look of the tall boy in front of the school, and his heart skips a beat. He
smiles as he heads towards him with the intent of saying hello. Then all of a
sudden, he stares into deep blue eyes, and his mouth refuses to make a sound.For a
moment, both Jou and Seto stare at each other before Seto turns around and
heads into the school without a word.END FLASHBACK
<<
Last night I had a dream about you… >>“Yeah. I’d
say I had a dream last night. A weird dream, but a sexy dream too!” Jou closes
his eyes as he remembers his dream. “Shizuka was here. She was reading a manga,
and she let me see it. I had to take it from her then. She shouldn’t be reading
things like that! It was starring two boys that look like me and Seto. The
blond guy was dressed in a red hooded thing like a shawl that was over a white
dress and jeans. There was someone who looked like Honda there and he was
making fun of the blond guy… I think I’ll call him Manga-Jou. So Manga-Jou
punched Manga-Honda and ran away, right to Manga-Seto. Manga-Seto was wearing a
trench coat and necktie, and that was it. That’s why I had to take the manga
from Shizuka. She’s too young to be seeing even animated penises! But boy was
Manga-Seto packing!”Jou stands
up and starts pacing. He sighs. “Manga-Seto and Manga-Jou had a brief spat of
words of which the only really important ones were when Manga-Seto said he
wanted Manga-Jou to suck him off. Needless to say, Manga-Jou ran away and found
Manga-Yugi, only Manga-Yugi was wearing a woman’s see-through nightgown with a
thong! Manga-Seto came up behind Manga-Jou and pushed him out of the way so he
could face off against Manga-Yugi. Then Shizuka stole the manga back from me
and ran off so I couldn’t take it back. I went to school and met up with Anzu,
and she had a manga too, but a different one than Shizuka. Hers wasn’t nearly
as well drawn, but it would seem to be starring the same two people. Manga-Jou
was naked on a bed. Naked and either bleeding out his ass or that mess on the
sheets was from his release. I couldn’t tell. This manga was in black and
white. Anzu told me that the manga I was looking through wasn’t even the only
‘Seto Kaiba fucks dog Katsuya Jounouchi’ manga she’s seen, and she had more
with her. The manga was actually a tabloid’s exploitation of my relationship
with Seto!”Ring,
ring…Jou listens
for a moment when the phone stops ringing. He shrugs his shoulders and
continues pacing. “That explains the one Shizuka had too, I guess. I was
totally shocked to hear that, but then Anzu gave me another she had with her,
and I got an even bigger shock. Right off the bat, it shows pictures of
Manga-Jou and Manga-Seto all sweaty and naked on the ground, not a bed, they
were outside beneath a cherry blossom tree! Manga-Seto was holding Manga-Jou
down by force and he was touching Manga-Jou’s penis. Not to mention kissing
Manga-Jou’s neck, but then he switched to Manga-Jou’s lips. Then he lifted
Manga-Jou’s knees up to his chest and forced his cock into Manga-Jou’s ass. My
pants were feeling a bit tight by the images even though they weren’t super
graphic. Then the next thing I knew, I was no longer looking at the manga and I
was laying my head down on my college entrance exams that I was taking after
school in an empty classroom. An image flashed through my mind of me naked on a
bed in tortuous ecstasy as Seto sucked me off. So of course Seto chose that
moment to come into the classroom with his briefcase. And he insulted me! I got
up and was going to kick his ass, but he grabbed my hand and put his other hand
over my mouth.”Jou places
his hand over his mouth the same way Seto did in his dream. “I was pissed until
he spun me around and stuck a finger in my mouth. He started kissing the back
of my neck, and I started sucking on the finger. I didn’t even notice him
unbutton my pants or help my right leg out of them,” he says as he slowly unbuttons
his pants, lowers the zipper, and pushes them down his legs, “but they stayed
mostly on my left leg. I guess it is a good thing I went to school commando
that day. I don’t think he’d like having to deal with my boxers. He lifted my
shirt to play with a nipple, and his other hand wrapped around my already hard
cock.” He lifts his shirt to mimic the actions done to his nipple as his hand
wraps around his erection and starts to stroke at a feverishly fast pace. “Then
he released me for just a second, so I guess he must have been unzipping his
pants to pull himself out, cause a moment later he was slamming an already
lubed up cock into my tight, unprepared asshole, and all I did was moan in
pleasure.”Jou moves
his hand from his chest and lowers his hand across his body to stick one
experienced finger up his ass, seeking out the spot he knows all too well from
his solo sexual encounters. He applies the pressure he desires to his prostate
gland as his hand works him closer to release. He falls to his knees as a wave
of pleasure encompasses him and he releases into the air. He removes his finger
from his ass. “Then I released all over my chest, and Seto released inside me
and pulled out. I slumped down to the floor. Then suddenly I was back with
Shizuka looking at a picture of Manga-Seto cuddling up to a sex-exhausted
Manga-Jou, and of course, post-sex, they were both naked in bed. I told Shizuka
she was grounded, then I woke up.”(Said I'm so sick of love songs)
<< I
must be stupid, must be crazy, must be out of my mind to say the kind of things
I said last night… >>Jou takes a
deep breath to calm himself and he gets up, straightening his clothes before
going to his kitchen to get the cleaning supplies and clean his release from
the carpet.(So
sad and slow)<<
Now here’s a clue: her favorite color’s blue. That’s how she’ll feel if she
can’t be with you cause you’re the one who takes her breath away when you look
that way. >>“Blue
always has been my favorite color,” says Jou finishing his clean up and putting
his cleaning supplies away.<<
She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign. She said ‘What you need is
Love Potion Number Nine’… >>“I think I
need a shower now, a nice cold one,” says Jou. He walks over to the remote and
hits the power button on the stereo.The stereo
changes channels.(So
why can’t I turn off the radio?)<<
Know all about, yeah ‘bout your reputation and now it’s bound to be a
heartbreak situation, but I can’t help it if I’m helpless every time that I’m
where you are… >>Jou walks
over to the stereo with a sigh after dropping the remote on the coffee table.
He looks it over for a moment before pushing the button he thinks looks like a
power button.The stereo
changes channels again.(Why
can’t I turn off the radio?)Jou sighs
again and walks into the bathroom, leaving the stereo to fend for itself. He
sheds his clothes and drops them into the hamper before climbing into the
shower stall and turning the water on. He shivers as the water hits his skin,
but he soon relaxes into the cool water. He waits a few minutes before adding
hot water and grabbing the soap to scrub his skin. He climbs from the shower
after rinsing off and grabs a towel to wrap around his waist. He walks into the
living room in time to hear, << Your arms are my castle. Your heart is my
sky. They wipe away tears that I cry… >>“Yeah. They
used to,” says Jou heading into his bedroom and grabbing some random clothes
from the closet. He dries off before even really looking at the clothes. He
gasps when he sees the outfit he picked out was one he borrowed from Seto. He
inhales the faint scent of Seto’s cologne before he pulls on the button-down
shirt and does up the bottom three buttons. He pulls on the pants and
luxuriates in the feel of them against his bare skin. He walks back out into
the living room.<< I
wanted you right here with me but I have no choice you’ve gotta leave. Because
my heart is breakin’ with every word I’m sayin’… >>Jou heads
into the kitchen to grab more sodas, and he returns to the living room. He sets
the sodas on the coffee table and collapses on the couch with a chocolate chip
cookie.(Cause I’m so sick of love songs)
(So
tired of tears)<< If
I was invisible, I’d make you mine tonight. If hearts were unbreakable, then I
can just tell you where I stand… >>“Been
there, done that… broke down…”<< If
you need to fall apart, I can mend a broken heart… >>“All it
takes to mend it… three simple words…”<<
You can run, you can hide, but you can’t escape my love… >>(So done with wishing)
(You
were still here)The
apartment door opens soundlessly, and Seto steps inside carrying a handful of
bags and a large bouquet of roses. He closes the door behind him and slides the
lock. He sets the bags down and holds the roses delicately as he turns to look
at the back of Jou’s head.Jou wipes
the tears from his eyes. “I miss you, Seto! I miss you so much!”<< I
always feel like somebody’s watching me… >>“I miss you
too,” says Seto quietly.Jou jumps
up from the couch and spins around to stare at Seto.“I brought
your Valentine’s presents with me,” says Seto holding out the roses in
offering.“I can’t
accept. We broke up, remember?” says Jou, “How did you get in here? I know I
locked the door.”“You gave
me a key,” says Seto pocketing the small silver-colored piece of metal, “And
you can still accept my gift. You’re still my closest friend, and I never
wanted to break up with you in the first place. I… brought dinner as well. Can
we at least sit down, eat a bit, and discuss this?”Jou sighs,
but his stomach answers for him by growling loudly.“Please
tell me that means you’ll eat with me and we can talk.”“I’ll go
get us some plates…”“No… allow
me,” says Seto heading into the kitchen.Jou follows
Seto and watches him fill the vase with water for the two-dozen red and pink
roses setting on the counter. “Hey, Seto, have you even figured out why I broke
up with you?”“Yes, and
believe me, I’m working on remedying the problem,” says Seto as he quickly but
efficiently prepares the roses and places them into the vase. Then he sets the
vase on the center of the table. He moves to the cabinets quickly and pulls
down two plates with an ornate ivy pattern and matching wine glasses. “Take a
seat, Jou, and just let me take care of you.”Jou sighs,
but he does as asked and sits down in front of his place setting, but only
after getting utensils from the drawer, both a standard British set of fork,
knife, spoon and a Japanese set of mixed-matched onyx and white jade inlaid
chopsticks.Seto smiles
at Jou’s behavior as he steps out of the kitchen and gathers up several, but
not all, of the bags he brought in. He returns to the kitchen and starts to
unload plastic containers. “I wasn’t sure what you would be in the mood for so
I brought Italian and Chinese.”“Right now,
I think I’d eat anything. I’m starving! Let’s eat!” exclaims Jou. His eyes
widen at the sight of all the food, and his stomach growls again. He smiles at
Seto before remembering that he’s supposed to be mad at the brunet and wiping
the smile from his face.“Where
would you like to start? China or Italy?” asks Seto.“China.
It’s closer,” says Jou.“I would
have brought wine, but I didn’t want you to think I was trying to get you
drunk. I brought sparkling grape juice instead. I know you like it,” says Seto
as he pulls out a bottle that looks like it should contain wine and pours some
of the pleasant reddish-purple liquid into the wine glasses. He places small
servings of each of the items on his own plate while at the same time piling on
large portions of fried rice, lo mein noodles, teriyaki pork, curry beef,
dumplings, and chicken with mushrooms onto Jou’s plate. Then he places a
fortune cookie on the edge of each plate. He sits down across from Jou and
smiles. “Enjoy!”(Said I’m so sick of love songs)
Jou lifts
his chopsticks and starts in on the beef with a content little moan. “Okay, so
talk… why am I so pissed at you?”“You’re
upset because you think I don’t care for you,” says Seto lifting his own
chopsticks, “I thought you understood, Jou. I care for you much more than you
know.”“I know you
care for me, and I know that you don’t believe in love,” says Jou in between
bites, “but it’s not good enough for you to just care for me anymore. I need
more.”“I see that
now. If I had known it earlier, you would have received more,” says Seto before
finishing off the last bite of his meager Chinese dinner.Jou quickly
finishes eating his food in silence.“I didn’t
realize that you were so emotionally needy,” says Seto.“Yeah? And
when we started dating, I didn’t realize you were emotionally incompetent!”
exclaims Jou.“I wasn’t
trying to insult you,” says Seto, “I was merely stating a fact.”“So was I!”
snaps Jou.“I didn’t
come here to argue with you, Jou,” says Seto. He opens his fortune cookie and
pulls the paper from it, but he doesn’t bother reading it as he moves to eat
the cookie first.“Maybe you
should have. At least things would have been normal around us then!” Jou cracks
open his fortune cookie and pulls out the little piece of paper. He clears his
throat and reads aloud, “Someone loves you more than you love him.”Seto
smiles.“Fortune
cookies are never right anyway!” Jou looks at Seto’s piece of paper as he
sticks half his cookie in his mouth. “What’s yours say?”“It says
Jou, I love you,” says Seto after lifting the paper and looking at it.“Yeah… like
I said, stupid fortune cookies are never right!”“They are
sometimes,” says Seto.“I’m still
hungry,” says Jou, “You said you brought Italian too?”“Of
course.” Seto once again dishes himself small portions while giving Jou much
larger servings of the chicken Parmesan, fettuccine al fredo, lasagna,
breadsticks, pizza, and cheesy breadsticks.“All my
favorite foods!” Jou smiles at Seto. “You did always know how to treat me
right!”“I’m glad
you approve,” says Seto draining his glass of juice and noticing Jou’s empty
one as well. He refills both glasses.“I do!”
“I’ve
really missed you,” says Seto.“I’ve
missed you too,” says Jou.“Do you
still love me?”“Of course
I still love you.”Seto and
Jou finish eating in silence and drain the last of their juice before they head
into the living room.“And now?”
asks Jou.“Sit down.
I have more presents for you,” says Seto.Jou sits
down on the couch and watches Seto grab another bag and move to sit upon the
couch himself. “These better be some presents if you think they’re going to win
me back!”“First, I
would like to give you these,” says Seto pulling a set of keys from the bag.“Keys?”
“The front
door, the back door, the Porsche…”“You didn’t
trust me to drive that!”“Jou, I
want us to give this relationship another chance, and I want that chance to
last us for the rest of our lives, and so as a first step to that, I need to
trust you. I’m still worried that you might crash the Porsche, but it has every
safety feature money can buy so I know if you do that you’ll come out alive. So
I’m willing to trust you with it,” says Seto, “This is a big step for me…
giving you the keys to my most prized car.”Jou takes a
deep breath and exhales slowly. “Not good enough!”Seto sets
the keys on the coffee table and pulls out a box of chocolates. He sets them
down and quickly pulls out two nine-inch stuffed animals, one that is a
Red-Eyes Black Dragon and the other that is a Blue-Eyes White Dragon.“Nice.
Trying to bribe me with the oldest gifts in the book!” exclaims Jou standing
up. “Excuse me! I have to go to the bathroom!”Seto leans
back and sighs as Jou enters the bathroom. He looks over at the answering
machine and sees it flashing. He stands up and walks over to it. “Six?”Jou comes
back out of the bathroom with water still dripping down his face.“Don’t you
check your messages when you get home?” asks Seto.“I…”
Seto pushes
the play button.<<
You have… six… new messages. >>Beep.
<<
Jou… come home, >> comes Seto’s voice as it’s recorded onto the
answering machine, << It’s Valentine’s Day, and I miss you. We can
work through this if only you’ll come back home. >><<
Nine fifty-five a.m. >>Beep.
<<
Jou… it’s Anzu, >> comes the female voice of one of his oldest
friends as the answering machine records her message, << I’m just
calling to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day! I’m sure you’re out with Kaiba
having a wonderful evening, but you know I don’t like calling him unless it’s
important and this message just isn’t 9-1-1 material! Give me a call tomorrow
or something, and we’ll get together to plan out gifts for White Day. I’m
thinking Seto would just love to have you dipped in dark chocolate for White
Day! >><<
Eleven fifteen a.m. >>Beep.
<<
Jou. It’s Yugi. I got a visit from Kaiba a few minutes ago. I thought I should
call you. We had a nice long conversation about you, >> comes Yugi’s
sweet voice through the answering machine, << I’m surprised that you
didn’t tell me. Why did you two break up? I thought you had a lasting
relationship! You seemed so much in love and so perfect for each other…>>
Yugi sighs. << I know that you like your privacy, but everyone thought
you two were sleeping together. Kaiba said you’d never had sex... that you
had always denied him. That doesn’t sound like you, but I guess I’ve never been
in that type of relationship with you to tell. If you’re there please pick up.
I don’t want to tell you everything over the answering machine! … Well, I guess
you’re not home. So let’s see… Kaiba came over and asked me for my help. He
said you two had a fight and that you broke up with him. He wanted my advice on
what was wrong and how he could apologize to you. So he explained your
relationship and how you’ve never had sex. I told him about how you always
talked about saving yourself for true love. I think he left sad. I think he
believed you didn’t love him. I think he may be coming towards you to
apologize. So, heads up if you’re home! See you tomorrow. >><<
One thirty-one p.m. >>Beep.
<<
Hey, big brother… it’s Shizuka, >> comes the female voice of his
little sister, << I’m getting ready for my date with Mokuba, but I
just wanted to call to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day! I wasn’t sure if you
and Seto would be at your place or his tonight. I thought you might like a
little bit of privacy at your apartment. I have your present with me, and since
you’re not there, I guess I’ll be giving it to you when I’m over at Seto’s place.
So I guess me leaving a message on this machine is kinda pointless, but you’ll
have a nice message from me when you finally do come home, so you’ll know I was
thinking of you! Have a good holiday, and try not to scream too loud when you
give it to Seto! >><<
Two fourteen p.m. >>Beep.
<<
Jou, I miss you, >> comes Seto’s voice through the machine, <<
I’m getting lonely without you around. Please, come home! I miss you so much I
even went to Yugi for help. You know how much I hate to admit any problems to
him, even if I am starting to allow him more into our joint life. He asked me
all sorts of questions about what went wrong in our relationship. He didn’t
even know that we had a big fight and you left. So I told him, everything. I
told him about our sex life! Doesn’t that tell you how much I care for you…
that I would talk to my rival about our sex life? Jou… Yugi asked me when was
the last time I told you that I love you. He thought that I might not have said
it enough. That’s ridiculous! You know my feelings for you. It’s Valentine’s
Day, Jou. Come back home. >><<
Three p.m. >>Beep.
<<
Jou, I love you, >> comes Seto’s voice through the machine.<<
Four forty-seven p.m. There are no new messages. >>Jou gasps.
He looks at Seto with wide eyes. “What?”“Jou… I
know that I’ve never told you before, but things have never been easy in my
life, and then you came into it and it was so easy to fight with you. Then we
found it was so easy to kiss each other and turn all of that violent energy
into sexual tension,” explains Seto staring straight into Jou’s brown eyes. “So
when I realized that I had fallen in love with you, it seemed so… right and so
very wrong at the same time! It would have been too easy to tell you and get
hurt if you didn’t feel the same, so I tried to complicate it. Then you told me
you loved me, and I thought you realized I felt the same way! I didn’t
understand that you needed me to say the words to make you understand. I
thought that you understood just by how long I kept you around. By how long I
waited for you to make love to me. I love you, Jou!”“All this
time you loved me and you never said anything! We could have been fucking each
other like bunnies months ago if you’d only said you loved me!” exclaims Jou,
“The only reason we didn’t have sex is because I wanted to wait for my first
time to be with someone who I loved and who loved me!”“What?”
snaps Seto, “I thought you were still having problems with the fact that we’re
both guys!”“No! I got
over that years ago! I’m totally cool with my sexuality! I was waiting for you
to say you loved me!” exclaims Jou.Seto moves
over to Jou and pulls him into a warm embrace and a passionate kiss. He pulls
away abruptly. “I have one more present for you!”Jou smiles
happily. “What is it?”Seto pulls
a small box from his pocket and passes it to Jou. “Open it?”“Is it an
engagement ring?” asks Jou.“No. Not
yet, but soon,” says Seto with a smile. “Now open the box!”Jou smiles
and opens the box. He pulls out a platinum locket on a matching chain. He opens
it to see Seto’s picture and hear Seto’s voice clearly say, “I love you, Jou,
with all my heart.”(So sad and slow)
“I love
you, Seto!” exclaims Jou.“I love
you,” says Seto, “Would you care to dance with me? I notice you have the stereo
on.”“Speaking
of the stereo. It was a great birthday present, but I think it’s broken. The
power button doesn’t work!” exclaims Jou.(So why can’t I turn off the radio?)
(Why
can’t I turn off the radio?)“Actually,
I programmed a lock into it so you wouldn’t be able to shut it off when I
wanted it on, and I wanted you to hear the music on tonight,” says Seto
blushing, “Sorry.”“You will
un-program that in the morning,” says Jou.Seto lifts
the remote and turns the station to his favorite. He drops the remote again.
“Would you please dance with me?”Jou
snuggles up to Seto’s chest. “Of course I will. You’re my boyfriend.”The two
boys start to dance along with the music.<< I
knew that we belonged together long before I knew your name and the only thing
I longed for was a sign to prove you felt the same. Somehow I knew your every
secret just by looking in your eyes. From the very moment I met you, I was
thinking of the rest of our lives, >> comes the pleasant voice of the
woman singer.Seto holds
Jou tightly and leans down to kiss his lips as they sway to the music.<<
Just say to me, I’m gonna love you ‘til the end of time. Somehow two hearts
have made a friend of time. Eternity, eternity is on our side. I’m not afraid
to say forever. You have made me feel so sure. ‘Cause I know it’s everlasting
and I’ve never had this feeling before. >>“Tell me
you love me,” whispers Jou.“I love
you,” whispers Seto in return, “Wear that locket and let it speak to you even
when I cannot.”“It will
never leave my neck,” whispers Jou.<<
Keep telling me. I’m gonna love you ‘til the end of time. Somehow two hearts
have made a friend of time. Eternity, I’ll love you for eternity. Caught in the
tide and it brought me to you. Under a spell, and now I know that dreams come
true… >>Seto kisses
Jou’s neck.<<
I’m gonna love you ‘til the end of time. Somehow two hearts have made a friend
of time. Eternity, eternity, is on our side. I’m gonna love you ‘til the end of
time. Somehow two hearts have made a friend of time. Eternity, eternity, is on
our side. Is on our side… >>Jou squawks
as Seto suddenly lowers him into a dip he wasn’t expecting. A moment later
though, he’s moaning as Seto pulls him upright into a heated kiss.<<
I’m gonna love you ‘til the end of time. ‘Til the end of time. Somehow two
hearts have made a friend of time. Eternity, eternity, is on our side.
Eternity, I’ll love you for eternity. >>Jou steps
out of Seto’s arms and grabs the remote. He presses the button to change the
radio back to his favorite station.<<
And when the night falls, loneliness calls. Oh, I wanna dance with somebody. I
wanna feel the heat with somebody. Yeah, I wanna dance with somebody… with
somebody who loves me… >>Jou passes
the remote to Seto. “Turn it off. I’m tired. I’m going to bed.”Seto
presses the button combination to turn the stereo off.Jou heads
to the bedroom door. “Are you coming or going?”“Coming
preferably,” says Seto.“I’d prefer
that too,” says Jou.Seto takes
a deep breath before rushing over to Jou and holding him close.“If you
have any business to do, you might want to take care of it,” says Jou before
going into his room, “and another thing… you’ll want to go to bed naked.”Seto heads
into the bathroom. When he enters the bedroom naked, he notices Jou lying on
the bed in nothing but his glorious flesh. He doesn’t even notice the other
items in bed with his boyfriend. He walks towards the bed and climbs into it.“Now before
we do this, you have to know, this is your Valentine’s present from me, and as
such this time we do it my way or you don’t get any tonight! Understood?” asks
Jou as Seto moves to kiss him.“I’m all
for it! Show me what you have in you, Jou,” says Seto, “Command me.”Jou lifts
the blindfold from the bed beside him. “Lie down and let me get this on you!”Seto’s eyes
widen. “Why?”“Because…
every time you kiss me, you keep your eyes open. It’s a little unnerving to
always have you watching me up close like that. I sometimes wonder if you’re
looking for zits or something!” exclaims Jou.“That’s not
it. You look so beautiful when I kiss you. Your face contorts into this
expression of pure rapture that I find completely gorgeous,” says Seto.“Oh.” Jou
blushes. “Anyway, I want this to be special. Just do this for me tonight. I
won’t leave it on you all night, just for the beginning.”“I trust
you, Jou. Don’t make me regret the decision to go along with this,” says Seto
as he lies down on his back and closes his eyes.Jou secures
the blindfold over his boyfriend’s eyes, and he smiles as he kisses the other’s
lips. “Thank you.”“Happy
Valentine’s Day, Jou.”“Right back
at you,” says Jou. “Now… where should I start? So many options!”“How long
have you been dreaming of this?” asks Seto.“About a
year. I came up with this idea around Valentine’s Day last year,” says Jou
straddling Seto and starting to massage the brunet’s shoulders, “I’ve gone over
it in my mind so many times in so many different ways.” He moves to kiss Seto’s
jaw and neck.“And in
this dream… what am I doing to you?”Jou blushes
even though Seto can’t see. “This isn’t about me… This is about me wiping away
any memories you might still have of all the lovers you’ve had before me… This
is about me proving my worth to you…”“Jou…”
Jou kisses
Seto’s lips to silence him, and his hands move down to rub and pinch the
hardening nipples. He slides down to lick and nip at Seto’s erecting penis.“Oh, Gods,
Jou!” gasps Seto, “You’ve been practicing!”“Bananas
are good for more than just snacks!” exclaims Jou.“Damn lucky
banana! But all the better for me!”Jou grabs
the bottle of lubricant from the bed and opens it, pouring some of it onto each
hand. “Now, hold still and don’t move, okay, Seto?”“I’ll hold
still,” says Seto.Jou moves
one of his hands down to slide a single finger into his own ass hole while his
other hand makes a ring around Seto’s hidden opening.Seto gasps…
a clear sign that he’s surprised by Jou’s sense of dominance.“Are you
okay with this?” asks Jou still circling the opening with his finger, “Are you
okay with me taking you?”“You can
make love to me whenever you wish to,” says Seto apprehensively. He bites his
lower lip.Jou slides
his finger into Seto’s opening and starts to stretch it to accept something
bigger.“I’ve never
been taken…”“What?” Jou
stills for a moment. Then he remembers his task and continues to stretch both
his own body and Seto’s.“I’ve never
been taken… I’ve… I’ve only had one lover before, a woman who helped me learn
who I was… Oh, Gods, Jou! Do that again! Yes! Yes!”“I never
knew you were bisexual, Seto,” whispers Jou sliding a second finger into each
opening and continuing to strike at their prostate glands.“I’m not.
She helped me learn that… I didn’t enjoy being with her,” says Seto moaning
slightly, but he stays true to his word and doesn’t move even though his hips
do twitch occasionally with the need to thrust against Jou’s fingers.“So… you’ve
never been with a guy?”Seto shakes
his head and his blush shows beneath the blindfold.Jou slowly
adds the third finger to both virgin openings. “We’ll have to change that. In
just a few moments… But you know,” he pants, “I always thought you had tons of
lovers in your past. Why didn’t you ever tell me you didn’t? Why didn’t you
ever tell me that you were a virgin to gay sex?”“I thought
you might think…”“What?”
“That I was
just pretending to be gay as a way to get under your skin…”Jou smirks.
“Oh, you’ll get under my skin later. You can guarantee it. I won’t always
dominate, although it is nice to have you obey my every command. Now… am I
hurting you? You look a little tense.”“I’m okay.
I can handle a little pain; especially for the pleasure you’ll be giving me
soon! I’m ready, Jou!”“I’m almost
ready myself,” says Jou taking another brief moment to scissor his fingers in
his own ass before withdrawing both sets of fingers and grabbing up the bottle
of lube again. He pours more of the thick liquid into his hands and closes the
bottle before tossing it onto the floor. He moans as he grabs his erection with
one hand. His other hand seeks out Seto’s erection to massage the lubricant
onto it. “You’re so big, and you feel so good.”“Jou!
Please… give it to me now!” exclaims Seto, “As quick as you can!”Jou kisses
Seto’s lips before lining up his opening with the tip of Seto’s cock. He sits
down as quickly as he can, forcing the penis inside him.Seto throws
his head back and moans.Jou removes
the blindfold from Seto’s eyes. He smiles when he sees the passion glazing over
the blue eyes.Seto looks
down at their joining and blinks several times. “I’m… inside you? But… but you
were preparing to take me! Surely you must be in great pain!”“I prepped
myself while doing you. I didn’t want you to think you could just take me
whenever you wanted. I wanted you to realize that for this relationship to work
sexually, we’ll need to compromise with sex, each taking turns taking the
other,” says Jou, “Now… should I start moving, big boy? You feel so good inside
me.” He wills his muscles to clamp around the thick member inside him.Seto moans
again. “Can I move now?”Jou blushes
and nods his head. “Um… you can take over control now if you want.”Seto pulls
Jou down against his chest and kisses him hard on the lips. He rolls them both
over and starts to thrust in and out of his boyfriend’s tight ass. “You feel so
good, Jou, so tight and hot and perfect!”Jou moans
loudly and clutches to Seto as they make love to each other. Moments later, he
screams out his release.With a
final thrust, Seto fills Jou with his seed and collapses onto his chest. “I
love you, Jou.”“Damn! I
love you too, Seto!”“If I ask
you to marry me on our anniversary, would you say yes?”“Are you
asking for the date of the ceremony to be our anniversary or the date of the
proposal to be our anniversary?” replies Jou.“Both. Our
second anniversary for the proposal and our third for the ceremony,” answers
Seto.“Double
yes, now can we go to sleep or do you want to take a shower first?”“We should
probably sleep now, and we can take a bath in the morning. You probably
couldn’t stand right now anyway,” says Seto slipping out of Jou and cuddling up
to his side.Jou
blushes.(Cause I’m so sick of love songs)
(So
tired of tears)(So
done with wishing)(You
were still here)(Said
I’m so sick of love songs)(So
sad and slow)(So
why can’t I turn off the radio?)(Why
can’t I turn off the radio?)“I’ll
always love you, Jou,” says Seto.“Will you
go get the necklace for me?”Seto groans
slightly as he climbs from bed and he heads back into the living room to fetch
the necklace for his blond lover. He returns with the chain and charm in hand
and passes it to Jou.Jou secures
the necklace around his neck and opens it to hear it speak once more, “I love
you, Jou, with all my heart.”Seto returns
to the bed and pulls Jou into an embrace as the blond closes the locket.Jou smiles.
“Let’s sleep now, lover.”Seto kisses
Jou’s lips before they cuddle together under a blanket and fall asleep.The End
So Sick – Ne-Yo
The Lover After Me – Savage Garden
Love, Me – Collin Raye
Cold Hearted – Paula Abdul
The Hardest Thing – 98 Degrees
Calling You (Operator) – Aqua
Story of a Girl – Nine Days
Worthless – No Secrets
Points of Authority – Linkin Park
One Boy, One Girl – Collin Raye
Savage Garden – To the Moon and Back
Save The Last Dance For Me – Aaron Neville
Put Your Arms Around Me – Texas
Don’t Turn Around – Ace Of Base
Shimmer – Shawn Mullins
Never had A Dream Come True – S Club 7
Life's a Dance – John Michael Montgomery
Mr Lonely – Bobby Vinton
Shut
Up and Dance - AerosmithGunning Down Romance – Savage Garden
Remember Me This Way – Jordan Hill
Skin Deep – No Secrets
Opposites Attract – Paula Abdul
Last Christmas – Wham!
Joey – Blonde ConcreteIn A Different Light – Doug Stone
From the Bottom of My Broken Heart – Britney Spears
We Belong Together – Mariah Carey
Forever Your Girl – Paula Abdul
Why Can’t I? – Liz Phair
Have You Ever? – Brandy
Don't Stay - Linkin Park
If She Would've Been Faithful – Chicago
But I Do Love You –
Leann RimesCareless Whisper – Wham!
Stay The Night – Chicago
Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely – Backstreet Boys
One Of Us – A-Teens
Be a Man – Aqua
Affirmation – Savage Garden
Ghost
of You and Me - BBMakIt Must Have Been Love – Roxette
I’ll Be Your Everything – Youngstown
Cinderella – Vince Gill
Love Love Love – Dreams Come True
I Won't Say I'm In Love – Hercules
If You’re Not the One – Daniel Bedingfield
I Think About You – Collin Raye
Change Of Heart – Cyndi Lauper
Simple and Clean – Kingdom Hearts
I Don't Wanna Live Without Your Love – Chicago
That Was a River – Collin Raye
I Can't Fight This Feeling – Chicago
The Fear of Being Alone – Reba McEntire
Somebody – Reba
McEntireI Knew I Loved You – Savage Garden
Digital Love – Daft Punk
Mirror Mirror – M2M
What Are You Waiting For? – No Secrets
Love Potion No. 9 – The Clovers
The Right Kind of
Wrong – Leann RimesEvery time We Touch - Cascada
Leave (Get Out) – JoJo
Invisible – Clay Aiken
Crash and Burn – Savage Garden
Escape – Enrique Iglesias
Somebody’s Watching Me – Rockwell and Michael Jackson
Eternity – Dreams Come TrueI Wanna Dance with Somebody (Who Loves Me) – Whitney
Houston- 1
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